But right now, we are just getting started.

January 6, 1999

Question:

Here's my moral dilema: I have only one sister, 5 years younger. She's got 3 kids. 3years ago she was homeless so I bought a house for them(I still rent cuz I make less than 20k a year) but they were supposed to buy it from me in 1 year...I gutted the house and rebuilt it new for then, and they destroyed it. they never pay rent on time and usually borrow rent from my mom. I AM kicking them out this year, but I feel guilty even though I shouldnt. And my mom has really layed the guilt on thick. She says I'm stealing everything for myself. I am single with a ten y/o boy so I do have to get on with my life, too! I guess what i'm asking is....am I really a scrooge?

It's too bad you can't pick your family as you would your friends. As with friends, you can dump them and get new ones if they bug you too much; family you can't! On those lines, you are unfortunately stuck with sis, but that doesn't mean you have to let her bring you down to her level.

There are some people that are homeless through no fault of their own; fate has dealt them a lousy hand. The rest are homeless because of what they did or didn't do. Your sis falls under the second set of circumstances and she's proving it to you in your home. You nee to give her the boot for your own good, and a scrooge you're not. You have already gone out of your way to help her and she is repaying you by trashing your belongings and not paying the bills. Your mother, on the other hand, is basically blaming you for her other daughter's shortcomings; the fact that she's paying the other one's rent at times is helping no one at all.

So, I say it's time for you to put yourself first, and kick her ass to the curb before she totally ruins your house. You've done your part and it hasn't been appreciated so move on without her. Your sis will eventually have to get her act straight, and then you might consider offering up some help once again, but not until then.

Good luck!

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