How Women Get What They Want Women are under the illusion they don't have to ask men for anything - that if the man really loved her, he would automatically and instinctively know what she needed. Yeah, right ... As if the dysfunctional drone even knew you were in the room, let alone knew what you were feeling. A woman has a better chance of finding a bathing suit off the rack that fits than finding a man who knows what she is going through. Ironically, however, men like to feel needed - like they're her knight in shining armor. Unfortunately, most turn out to be needy, like her nightmare from The Shining. Therefore, it is important that a woman ask a man directly for what she wants, not indirectly. He is not a mind reader. He doesn't even read a map, how's he going to read a mind? How To Ask A Man To Do Something Always remember these five important rules when asking a man to do something: 1. Make sure the man is conscious. 2. Crash the hard drive on his computer and line the bird cage with the sports section. 3. Be brief! Limit your nagging harangue to two, three hours, max. 4. Reward him for cooperative behavior. Offer to cook him something that doesn't have a peel-back cover. 5. Punish him when he refuses to cooperate. Microwave his remote on high power for 55 minutes. Rotate 1/4 turn, and microwave again for another 35 minutes. 6. Use "would you" or "will you" instead of "you'd better" or "do as I say and no one will get hurt". The Right And Wrong Way to Ask A Man How you ask a man to do something makes all the difference. Women think that a subtle nuance or slight turn of phrase will have no effect whatsoever on the resolve of their mucho-macho muscular moron. It does! Which is why you should always use "would you" and "will you" instead of "could you" and "can you". For example:
Do say: Would you please take out the garbage?
Do say: Would you like to go out to a nice dinner Saturday night?
Do say: Would you mind watching the kids while I take a night off with my
girlfriends?
Do say: Would you take me to a movie this week?
Do say: Would you like me to listen to you talk about your day some more?
Do say: Would you consider getting a vasectomy?
Do say: Would you like to take a vacation?
Do say: Would you get out of my life? |
