With commercials for the sale,
And an ad for all these women's clothes,
Was ignored by every male.
But lurking in a cranny,
Was the monster transvestite,
And going to a women's sale,
Is every TV's right.
It burst out from its hiding,
And made it to the cage.
No one dared to stop it,
'T was in a fearful rage.
And as the cage ascended,
All the men beneath,
Started to a' wailing,
And a gnashing of the teeth.
It marched out of the pit cage,
This mighty transvestite,
And the casting of its shadow,
Turned the day into the night.
It headed down to Halifax,
And headed into Sears.
With it's three inch heels and teddy,
It was a sight my dears.
It ran in past the counter,
It grabbed everything in sight,
Its face was streaked with coal dust,
And women screamed in fright.
But coming from the pet shop,
Was a little girl called Mary,
And she carried in her hand,
A little bright canary.
A brilliant yellow was the bird,
It chirped its little song,
And she headed into Sears,
Not knowing what was wrong.
The TV saw the little girl,
And then it saw the bird,
Then it turned around and ran,
Which really was absurd.
It seems that it was really scared,
It headed for the pit,
And up until the present day,
No more was seen of it.
Some folks think that canaries,
Were used to detect gas,
Because their constitutions,
Were as delicate as glass.
But nothing's further from the truth,
It now has come to light,
The reason for canaries,
Is the dreaded transvestite.
2nd. March. 1996.
Back to Table of Contents
Back to HOME PAGE