Dear John, I wanted to write to you ever since I read the first of your wonderful articles on the Rochester Running Page. ("Articles"- there’s a misnomer if ever there was one.) John, I have already embarked on the apprenticeship to become a Journeyman. I have passed the irrevocable gate of knowing it is possible to run more than 42 kilometers and, humbled by what that means, have been seeking guidance as to the "Where?". Not the "Why?" I know the "Why?" - it is in me already, brooding, coiled, waiting to stretch itself out – achingly long and ancient. And I can work out the "When?" and the "How?"- that’s technical. The "Who?"- is easy. The highest me, locked in the terrible and beautiful dance with the basest me, in the Yin/Yang joy of manifestation. The "What?" has changed in the Deepening of the Distance, for I have been running a while now. And so it was that I sought a guide to the "Where?", and bless you John, you bring it. You bring it right home. I return from your writings moved and sometimes in overflowing ache/joy that I already know a little of these landscapes that you have mapped. I know them for the fields of the Divine, both barren and wondrous. I am in awe of them and frightened to go there as I always am before the "Setting Out". Knowing I will find familiarity in those spaces and deliverance in those lessons, I have the courage to go along there by the Long Path. To find another way into the Ashes. Bless you, your magnificent memory and your penetrant plume. Many travel but cannot bring that Otherworld back for the tribe. You hold those places inside your heart and bring back a glimpse, so we too can venture with you, even if only for a few moments and even if only in the faintest shade. You testify. Shaman, be you thricely blessed for you invite. You have truly invited my heart to run on that trail with you and I know it will be done. And when at last I meet you, I will probably cry a little. I am a bit frightened of that day, for it will be a long one, and I don’t know how my measure will be. I hope that it will be enough. It will be good enough for something, of that I feel certain, and so I will go in peace. To finish with another’s words as you often do. – I realized that what draws me back to the 100 mile distance is the emptying of myself that is required in order for my finish, I empty all that is John out and then have the opportunity to refill it with better stuff. It doesn't happen perfectly, most of the old stuff, the old behavior and attitudes come rushing back in ASAP, but as an unexpected gift of God's grace maybe only 99% comes back, not all the pettiness, jealousies and resentments fill back in. The other 1% is filled with good stuff, the simple stuff, the kind stuff, stuff I want to be made of. This emptying of my last drop of blood into the Divine Cup is what must be done. I have long known that it must. And now I know this long-running as a way of accomplishing that – thanks to you. Peace, Susanne.
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