Why People Abuse

Recently there has been a tendency to redifine the term to reflect the most common cause of domestic violence in the West. It has been proposed that domestic violence should be called 'partner or ex-partner violence'. A more radical view is that it should be called 'violence committed by male partner or ex-partner'. In the West, this is the most common type of domestic violence and the term 'child abuse' can cover other aspects of domestic violence.

Thus such a definition would make other cases of domestic violence invisible.

This problem is particularly true with Asian women. Many Asian girls who were forced into marriage by their parents and relatives and want to escape their situation are victims of domestic violence under the current use of the term. If we redefine the term, they are not. They may still suffer abuse when they grow up, no longer to be viewed as a case of child abuse. Where are we going to place them?

Married Asian women may also suffer verbal and emotional abuse as well as physical abuse from their in-laws other than their own husbands. Are they not to be viewed as the victims of domestic violence? Should domestic violence resources not be wasted on their cases?

The simple truth is that people abuse because they can get away with it. In most culture, men have more power than women. But this is not true to every individual relationship. In some cultures, age grants you power. And where power imbalance is, the possibility for abuse is always there.

Culture is no excuse for violence. But it is essential to understand the cultural difference when you address the suffering of victims. Asian culture may throw some surprises for the white feminist understanding of 'domestic violence'. But leaving the term where it is does not defeat the white feminists. They were right in one fundamental aspect.

Domestic violence stems from power imbalance. It takes a saint not to abuse unchecked power. Adressing power issue is a step forward in solving the problem.