(TOS, K/Ciani, K/f, K/f, NC-17, 1/1)

Disclaimer: Paramount owns Star Trek. I have just borrowed the characters. No infringement is intended.

If you are under 18 or easily offended, don't read this story as there are quite a few mentions of sex.

Trust Me!

It's really true. She left me and she won't come back.

Why? She says I cheated on her! She says I can't be trusted. Me. Captain, no Admiral, Kirk can't be trusted.

She's gone. She took all of her things and she's gone.

What am I going to do? I love her. I really do. And I need her, too.

So what happened, why does she think I cheated. .....

OK, Jim. Taping this won't help if you don't come clean.

She was supposed to be in a meeting last Tuesday. All day. But the ambassador got sick. So she decided to surprise me for lunch. She used to be sweet like that. So she saw us.

She found me with Susan. I didn't hear her open the door or I would have stopped. She must have seen something, too. Now she says I was cheating. I wouldn't have done that. I promised Lori I wouldn't make love to anyone else and I haven't. I keep my promises. I can be trusted. Those women never meant anything. Not to me. It can't be cheating if I didn't care about them, can it? It never changed how I felt about Lori.

Lori's changed now, this last week. She was so hard today. I never knew she could be like that; she even refused to talk to me. Refused to see reason.

But I need to think back. Perhaps. Yes...Last Monday.

Before all this happened. It was my turn to cook. I left work a little early, stopped by the store. Lori always teased me about my fondness for fresh food, but I'd missed it in space. One of the luxuries I'd found again in my life with Lori. Anyway, I had the chicken cut up and in the teriyaki marinade when Lori got home. I cut the tomatoes into chunks while she changed. I had the wine poured when she came into the kitchen. We shared a welcome home kiss tasting of wine. She sipped while I washed the lettuce, then she slipped her arms around my waist while I tore the lettuce. It was so warm and homey.

Then, the other Lori came out, the sexy wench that was all mine. I'd been so pleased to meet this part of her personality. I loved her mind, her ambition. I'd have settled for those. But I loved this Lori, too.

She slipped her hands into my pants, tugged them down, tossed them aside. Still leaning against me, she rubbed her hands down my buns and back up. I played her game, slowly tearing the lettuce, not finishing so she could play.

She ran her fingers over me, slipped one hand between my legs, toyed with me there. Her other hand slid around my waist under my shirt. She ran her thumb over my nipples, teasing me. I got so hard, so good and hard. Then, she asked me for her dinner. All innocence, as if she hadn't just been seducing the cook.

No stir fry had ever been cooked so fast. She refused me my pants, but let me wear the apron until the food was done.

We ate more slowly than I thought possible. Me in only my shirt. Her licking her lips of the teriyaki sauce, making sure I noticed every flick of her tongue.

When we finished, she led me to the sofa, took a last sip of wine. She pulled off her slacks, strutting her stuff for me. I reached for her, but she told me 'no.'

She straddled me, slid onto me. She was tight and hot.

We didn't last long, but gods it was good. I carried her to bed and held her. She always liked that. We did the dishes in the morning.

Then, Tuesday. What a day! I'd settled a conflict between Gerald's Planet and their main moon, Wilson. Some silliness over their solar power satellites. Simple matter. I got the ambassadors together and worked out a schedule for the current satellites and an agreement to build another one soon.

They trusted me to do what was best. I'm that sort of officer.

Wilson's ambassador had a really sexy aide, who made a pass at me. Since everyone else had left - we were finishing up the paperwork, I took her up on it. She was hot and willing.

Heck, she asked me. I was just making her feel good. Me, too.

So hot, so wet, so exciting there on my desk.

Great way to start the afternoon. I was nice and relaxed. Got a lot of paperwork done. Finally got the budget for the academy finished and signed off. I even got those extra hours of high gravity calisthenics added in. Here at headquarters, it's all in how you play the game.

I got home on time that evening. It was Lori's night to cook, so I settled onto the couch with a book. After an hour or so, I began to get hungry, which led me to wonder where she was. I called her office. They told me she was unavailable.

That's always meant that she's in an important meeting and can't be disturbed. I knew she was meeting with the Andorian Ambassador that day, so I just assumed she'd ended up in a late meeting. I grabbed a sandwich, read a while longer, and went to bed.

After my lunch treat and the special dinner with Lori the night before, all I could think about was sex. I've heard some men talk about needing a break, but for me more sex has always meant wanting even more. In space, that sometimes made life uncomfortable. Those weeks after shore leave were always uncomfortable, except when I was hooked up with Uhura. She was hot and nearby. Too bad she wanted someone who'd remember her name every time, not just most of the time. And Janice was, well, she was convenient, being my yeoman and all, but she wanted more out of her career, and, since she was bright and capable, it made sense as an officer to promote her off ship. .....

Ok, back to last week. I took a quick shower, lay on the bed, and started thinking about women and sex and more women and... Soon I was in the best fantasy I've had in a long time. I was lying naked on a huge bed. The sun was shining from both sides of the room. I was so hard I ached, but I just knew that I'd get mine soon enough. Then these two beautiful women approached me.

Nyota on my right and Lori on the left, crawling toward me, very sexy approach. I could only see their heads and shoulders. One so dark, such smooth skin, sculptured hair, dark red lips. The other pale, long lashes, softly draped hair. They smiled at me, then approached my groin. Uhura licked her lips.

She lifted her head slightly, as did Lori. Their lips met as they kissed, deeply. I love to watch two women kiss.

Then they smiled at me again, Lori's lips darker than before, matching Nyota's. Together they bent downward.

Their mouths met again around the head of my cock. Their tongues lapped at me, swirling over the head, touching each other around me, then giving me the attention. I could feel Lori's hand sweeping across my thigh, then cupping my balls.

She was so good at that. And Nyota's hand holding my shaft as those two beautiful faces and tongues worked me over.

Gods, it didn't take long for that fantasy to cause me to shoot off. I wiped myself up and drifted off to sleep, thinking I should remind Lori that the sheets needed changing.

What am I going to do without her?

So Wednesday morning, I got up, got dressed. I noticed something strange about the bathroom but couldn't figure it out. At the time I thought maybe Lori had changed the hand towel color or something like that. But I wasn't sure. So I went to work. I called her office. I was told she was fine, but unavailable. Again. I asked her aide to have her call me.

A couple of times during the day, I thought about her, our courtship, how special she was to me. I remembered how turned on I was by her. An admiral and a sexy woman. Power at work and the home life I needed after a decade and a half in space. The best of both worlds. And she was a good conversationalist, liked things I liked. An amazing woman. We had such a good time. We used to be so close. I really liked having a woman who loved me, and trusted me. Just me, not the Starfleet Officer. And I wondered where she was.

That evening, still no Lori. This had gone on long enough. I called her office. Again, unavailable. I told them they had better put me through or I'd call security. No luck.

I'd already changed into my jeans, started dinner. So I put the veggies in the fridge and went to change back into uniform. An admiral has a bit more clout than some guy in jeans.

That was when I noticed her clothes were gone. Well, I found a ratty pair of slippers in the closet and some socks in the bathroom. Oh, I figured out what was wrong in the bathroom.

Her shampoo and toothbrush were gone. The creme rinse was still there, the one I liked to borrow.

I pulled on my tunic, beginning to think there was a major problem. Back in the living room, I realized one of her paintings was gone. One was there, over the mantle - the one she gave me for Christmas. Either we'd had a very weird break- in or something. I was getting pretty worked up over this. I didn't think Starfleet would ship her out and not tell me. But even if they did, would she take her paintings. Or her hiking boots.

I made it to the door. I was sure her office held the secret, someone there would tell me. As I opened the door, the computer terminal sounded the urgent message beep. Oh good, I thought. It must be Lori.

Well, it was. Sort of. It was a lawyer informing me that Lori and I were separated, at her request. Contract not to be renewed.

I was shocked. There was no explanation. I had no idea what to think. After all, I married this one, invited half of Starfleet to the wedding. I'd wanted to have a family with her.

Heck, I put up with her crying spells when she'd had the miscarriage; I'd even cried with her at first, real tears. I'd wanted that baby, too. But she carried on for a long time. We could have another. So I held her because she needed me. I tried to be there for her. Surely she knows that.

And for a month I only had sex at work or some club. I gave her everything and she left me. No note, no warning. I started to get angry and went to her office anyway.

She was nowhere to be found and no one would tell me anything, except that she wasn't there. She had called in to take a few days off, but told them she would check in periodically.

Her staff thought she was with me.

Finally I went home. And thought about Lori. I thought I could trust her. I couldn't believe she'd left me.

Finally, though, I slept.

Thursday. Three major meetings. Planned a summit for New Peru and New Chile to discuss joint ventures in genetic engineering to avert disaster when their planets passed through a space-dust cloud. Gave a speech at the academy on proper interaction with alien species. My home turf. Starfleet. I've always had what it took to be a good officer. Just never quite seemed to figure out women.

That evening I attended a Starfleet reception. One ambassador and a couple of aides made it clear they'd like my company. So I took one of them up on it. The Andorian. I always liked variety, and blue was pretty different to look at.

And she was small and easy to hold. And smelled, well, different. Not really good, but alien. We had sex in her entry hall, in her shower, in her hallway. I always liked a woman I could wrap around my waist when I took her.

I felt pretty good as I made my way home. Still it was lonely in that empty apartment. Lori had always been fun to talk to. I missed that. Another night.

Friday morning I got the legal papers. Adultery. She claimed. She couldn't wait two more months for our contact to end, she wanted out now. But adultery! No one claims adultery these days.

I finally got in touch with her lawyer. She didn't ask for any money, or anything we owned together. She just wanted out. Out now. He said she wouldn't sue for separation under the adultery charge, if I'd sign the papers without it. I asked him to ask her to reconsider. To tell her I loved her. He told me essentially that I should 'keep it in my pants' if I wanted an exclusive contract to work out.

So I sat there alone wondering about the injustice of it all. Wondering what Lori had found out. Had she noticed the red marks I didn't quite get healed last week from the Cerliean woman. I'd used the regenerator, but sometimes that doesn't get everything. Gods that woman had been something. About 20 cm taller than me, built very sturdily. But I could never resist a challenge. And that Cerliean hammock she had in her cabin. I just had to make one hard thrust and that hammock swayed just right to do all the work. Heaven on earth, or in low level orbit anyway. And her mouth, what she did with her tongues. That's how I got those bruises.

But I can't see how Lori would have known. I got the ones on my chest taken care of, and I don't think Lori checked out my thighs that night. Of course I don't always remember everything when things get carried away.

Or did her aide tell her that he's seen me with that cute Vulcan woman. Reminded me of Spock, just a bit. So logical.

Such a brilliant mind. And somehow it was logical for her to take me to the embassy for lunch. And logical for it to be private and logical for her to scientifically sample the anatomy of this particular human male. If only Lt. Hanson hadn't seen me two-finger her good-bye. Still he's known for his discretion and it was just fingers he saw. He doesn't know just how talented Vulcans can be.

I must have sat there for hours trying to figure out what she could have found out, and what in the world she could be so upset about. Even if she found out about my other women, she must know I never made love to them. That takes caring.

And I love Lori. Only her. I thought she trusted me enough to know that.

Then this morning, I met with her lawyer to sign the papers. I asked him again to ask her to forgive me for whatever it was. He told me that I shouldn't have sex with busty, blond bimbos in my office if I expected not to be found out eventually.

That did it. I knew what had happened. I told that lawyer to tell Lori 'it meant nothing. She can trust me.' He laughed and told me she'd thought I'd say that. And she'd said to forget it.

She must have come by last Tuesday and seen me with Sharon. I must have forgotten to set up the no-interrupt lock.

And she's mad and hurt. I never meant to hurt her.

What am I going to do now?