The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy Timeline
This file was based on the Book _The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy_,
_The Restaurant at the End of the Universe_, _Life, the Universe,
and Everything_, and _So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish_
by Douglas Adams.
I have put some arrows
to help the reader follow
every character
sequence of events, how each one has iteracted with this
confusing time-travel Universe
I am using the correct (but seldom used) convention of 1 billion
= 1012. See the main page
for more references.
This timeline contains spoilers. Those who haven't read the books and
wish to do should not read this page.
And remember: Don't Panic
Big Bang
The Universe is created (?)
3 millionths of a second later
All known gods come into existence
20,000 million BC
Silastic Armorfiends of Striterax
some thousand million BC
The Vogons acquire their final shape; they never evolved again
17.5 million BC
Deep Thought is build, and begins his 7.5 million years calculation
of the Answer to the Ultimate Question of
Life, the Universe, and Everything
10 million BC
Galactic Empire - with economical prosperity, rich people
spend money in the Planet-making industry of Magrathea
Deep Thought calculates the Answer to the Ultimate Question
of Life, the Universe, and Everything
The Earth, the computer designed by
Deep Thought to calculate the Question to the Ultimate Answer,
is built
5 million BC
Magrathea becomes the richest planet of the Galaxy. The Galactic
Empire collapses. Magrathea enters into suspended animation
2,000,003 BC
The Golgafrinchans trick 1/3 of its population to leave the
planet in a ship
2 million BC
Disaster Area's show at Krakafoon
Zaphod, Trillian, Arthur and Ford are trapped in
Hotblack Desiato's suicidal ship. Arthur and Ford escape to
the Golgafrinchan's ship B. Zaphod and Trillian return
to the Present
The Golgafrinchans come to Earth.
They may be the ancestors of Mankind
1,999,999 BC
Krakafoon's desert becomes a paradise
1,999,997 BC
Wowbagger the Infinitely Prolonged insults Arthur Dent
1,999,995 BC
Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect find an eddie in the space-time
continuum and go to the Future
1.8 million BC
Homo habilis (real)
c.1700 AD (?)
The Dordellis Wars wipe out the Pirates
September the 3rd, 1781 AD
Birth of Zaphod Beeblebrox, in Betelgeuse Five
c.1800
Zaphod
and Ford Prefect,
still kids, raid Yooden Vranx's
Arcturan Megafreighter
1951
Birth of Arthur Dent
1966
Ford Prefect comes from Betelgeuse to Earth
c. 1970
Death of
Yooden Vranx, President of the
Imperial Galactic Government. Zaphod decides to become President
1971
Zaphod Beeblebrox becomes the President of the
Imperial Galactic Government
1978
Arthur Dent
moves from London
1979
Probably at this time, after the solution to the
Krikkit problem,
Arthur Dent is left in planet Krikkit

March, 1981
Zaphod Beeblebrox
,
disguised as Phil, comes to Earth, and
takes Trilliam from
Arthur Dent
August 27, 1981
Cricket Match between England and Australia begins
(real)
Tuesday, September 1st, 1981
The Cricket Match between England and Australia ends in a draw,
but England wins the Ashes by 3 - 1
(real)
Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect come from the Past.
They meet Slartibartfast and go back to some other time

Thursday, September 3rd, 1981
The
Vogon Constructor Fleet destroys the Earth.
Arthur Dent and Ford Prefect escape.
Note:
Nemo pointed to
me that in the Hitchhikers Game this date is 1982-10-04; since
this date is a Monday it is obviously wrong
Earth Population: 5,000 million (real)
Zaphod Beeblebrox steals the _Heart of Gold_. Trilliam
goes with him
Arthur and Ford are thrown into the void close to Barnard's
Star, and they are rescued by the _Heart of Gold_.
September 4th, 1981
The _Heart of Gold_ comes to Magrathea, in the Horsehead Nebula
September 5th, 1981
Prostetnic Vogon Jeltz attacks the Heart of Gold. They escape
with the help of Zaphod's grand-grandfather
After some adventures, they go to the Restaurant at the
End of the Universe
February 1982
Arthur Dent returns to Earth. He meets Fenchurch in her brother's
car
April 1982
Arthur Dent meets and loses Fenchurch again
Summer 1982
Arthur Dent meets Fenchurch again, they remain together for
a long while
2981
Revolution comes. The marketing division of the Sirius
Cybernetics Corporation are the first executed
576 thousand million and 5560 AD
The Big Crunch, or Gnab Gib: the Universe collapses and terminates
Zaphod, Trillian, Arthur and Ford come to
the Restaurant at the End of the Universe.
They steal Hotblack Desiato's ship, and return to
Year 2 million BC
The Prophet Zarquon returns
The precise date of the destruction of the Earth by the Vogon Construction
Fleet can be calculated this way:
- It happened on a Thurday in some year of the 80s
(The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy)
- Two days before, the English - Australia match for the Ashes finished
(rather spetacularly, with three alien ships invading the playing field;
but the aliens made England win the match and the ashes -
Life, The Universe, and Everything)
- The destruction of the Earth happened in the first days
of September (So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish)
So, I searched for all Ashes in the 80s where the last test was
close to September and England either won or lost by a small margin
(so that an Alien invasion might reverse the outcome). The only
possible candidates were the 1981 and the 1985 Ashes. But the
1985 Ashes ended on a Monday (September 2), while the 1981
Ashes fit nicely into the timeline.
Created: 1997
Please send any comments to
albmont@centroin.com.br
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