I Can Change
© Alicia, Nov. 5, 2002

I can change, I can change
I am not limited or resigned to disaster
and everywhere I turn I see
I'm a brand new me!

I've fallen
I didn't choose to leap
point A to B to C
steps I ignored when I reached

I am graded
it's a poor report
I am in a problem
with no rewind as a last resort

But I can change
Even if it were the end
I'd know the answer to give
Understanding won't be empty, I can give myself time

Change me, change me
I'm not in this place alone
I don't wanna belong
I'll someday be home

I'll move on, wait it out
Use what I have, leave it behind
Don't give it a name, it's not Your design
I don't wanna get used to this

Gimme boredom, gimme entertainment
I don't like my brain to work
Shut it off, live my denial
People annoy me in my life

The world is depression in it's purest form
does it matter what goes right or wrong
the days last too long
you can't see them going on and on

Oh God don't let me be
I'm willing to let you change me
Inside out, whatever counts
The need's too big to be denied

Reading, writing, watching, the way
I let them touch me
If the small things make something big
I change them all, I actually get it

Give up my fantasies
They're all wrong anyway
It's naughty, you can't have sex with me
and masturbation just makes me hungry

Speak clearly, I'll do that now
I'll only hide what's mine
You need to hear it I have no fear
Thought it was about entertainment

The point matters to me
Someday there will be a real need
Someday there will be me
'Til then I'll stay accessible

And I can change anything
It's all me, You in me
I am You in my innermost part
You can change me, I'll still be me.


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