And The Winner Is...

Mulder: "I think it wants to give us something."

Scully: "What's that in its hand?"

Gumby: "I'm Gumby, dammit!"

From the mind of Aaron Slack
April 13, 1999

The Runners Up

Alien: Alas, poor Gumby, I knew him, Mulder. A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. He hath borne me on his back a thousand times. And now how abhorred in my imagination it is! My gorge rises at it.

Mulder: There hang those lips that I have wished to kiss so often. (Thinking, while glancing at Scully out of the corner of his eye.)

Alien: Where be your gibes now? Your gambols, your songs, your flashes of merriment that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one now to mock your own grinning? Quite chapfall'n?

Alien addressing Mulder: Now get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let her paint an inch thick, to this favor she must come. Make her laugh at that. Prithe, Mulder, tell me one thing.

Mulder: What's that my lord?

Alien: Why is thy hand upon my lady's very nice asseth? (Ass, in case you didn't know.)

Mulder: It is very nice indeed, but tell me, my Lord, how did you know?

Alien: I know many things, knave.

(With apologies to Shakespeare!)

Alexis Faust & Chris Bally | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Alien (cheerfully): Dana!

Scully (also cheerful): How are you?

Gumby: Hi Mulder!

Mulder: Geez, I hate these Action Caption reunions!

Ludo | April 16, 1999

--------------------

In exchange for a dance with the beautiful red-head, the visitor makes an offering to her partner...

Kathryn | April 13, 1999

--------------------

Don't take candy from strangers Scully, even if it is a licorice allsort.

LIZ | April 13, 1999

--------------------

Scully: Mulder, you know what they say: 'Beware of Aliens bearing gifts!'

Jess Idres | April 14, 1999

--------------------

Mulder: Scully, this proves that Gumby is simply a goverment plot to convince the populace that green individuals are a normal occurrence, in preparation for colonization.

Scully: [sotto voice] Shut up, Mulder, or you get us both eviscerated. [louder] We...come...in...peace. We...love...Claymation.

mobiustrip | April 11, 1999

The Contenders
(in chronological order)

Scully: "No, no, no. He said Samantha! Not gumby, SA-MAN-THA!"

Mulder: [thinking] "I've really got to work on my alien communication skills."

Kate Anderson | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Alien: "I will trade you this bendable action figure for your partner.. ."

Mulder: "Hell yeah, that's an original!"

Dark Saber | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Unfortunately, Pokey was sick the day of shooting. Here's the next best thing....

"This is my new friend Mokey!"

KidCat505 | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Wait Scully, I think he's trying to tell us something. What is it boy? Gumby's in trouble?!

ms-spooky | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Scully looked at the alien and then at Gumby, laughing slightly.

Mulder: What is it, Scully?

Scully: Aliens are grey, huh? Looks like you were wrong, Mulder!

Mulder: Isn't that that guy from my dream? (points at Gumby)

Scully: Don't try to change the subject!!!

Frodo Underhill | April 11, 1999

--------------------

This week on the X-Files...Scully finds herself mysteriously intrigued by a tall attractive stranger with a rather large gumby.

Adrienne | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Thanks, guys . . . Wow . . . First of all, I'd just like to thank the Academy . . .

Melvin F. | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Scully: Remember, he gets a bowl of kibble in the morning and be sure to walk him by 6 PM or you'll be cleaning up his clay...

Anne Packrat | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Alien: "We have been monitoring the Earth's airwaves and we have made this statue for you of who we believe is your leader, Gumby. Now I am in search of your leader and his assistant, Pookie."

Scully: "No, that's Pokey, and they're not our leaders."

Alien: "It's not pokey! It's true I tell you!" And is that a "poke me in the ribs" crack?"

Scully: "No, the horse's name is Pokey, and you really need to get away from the tv for a while and get something to eat. You need some meat on those bones."

Alien: "I vaporized the last person to make fun of my ribs!"

Mulder: "Uh, Scully, let's not make him mad. I'll take you to our leader Gumby..."

Strawberryshake | April 11, 1999

--------------------

One scene that didn't make the initial movie release: as Scully and Mulder race to escape the disintegrating alien Antarctic breeding colony, they must dodge a recently awakened alien still carrying his sleep toy.

Q | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Scully: The gestation renders the victim's bones porous and jelly-like.

Mulder: Oh no, it has another victim!

Gumby: I'm SUPPOSED to look like this! Help! Pokey! Anyone! Help!

Q | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Alien: I made this for you Scully. It's a sculpture of me.

Scully: That's pushing it a little.

Mulder: Eh, oh. Is that one of those flexible Gumbys?

Justin Cherry | April 12, 1999

--------------------

Mulder: Hey, Alien, if you give me that posable Gumby, I'll let you join me grinding Scully.

Alien: YEESSSS!

Scully: C'mere greeny. Let me wrap my arms around you.

Justin Cherry | April 12, 1999

--------------------

I'm sorry to tell you this, but there was a mix-up in the maternity ward.

You won't see your son for a while, though. He ate Mr. & Mrs. Gumby.

Rachel | April 12, 1999

--------------------

Alien: Please forgive me for not groveling in your greatness. Oh Powerful Masters Mulder and Scully. But I come bearing a gift! We bring you this gift in hopes of reconciling our fatal mistakes of the past. Please except our humblest apologies. Here is your sister Powerful Master Mulder, Samantha. The time travel has altered her DNA a tad.

Mulder: WHAT?! This isn't SAM!

Scully: Let it go Mulder, at least you got her back!

Jennifer | April 12, 1999

--------------------

Scully, what is that thing?

I don't know Mulder. To me it looks like an alien being.

Look it has Gumby.

Mike Brooks | April 13, 1999

--------------------

See, Scully? The aliens _can_ reproduce by themselves....and look at the result!

Erin | April 13, 1999

--------------------

Scully: "A Gumby doll for me? How sweet! But how did you know it was my birthday?"

Mulder: "He must be telepathic!"

Alien: "Nah! I just looked it up on a website."

Aaron Slack | April 13, 1999

--------------------

Mulder: "I think it's trying to tell us that the little green guy is yours, Scully."

Scully: "You mean that thing in its hand is my baby?!!"

Mulder: "I wonder if aliens have to pay child support?"

Aaron Slack | April 13, 1999

--------------------

Hold on a minute there, twinkletoes. You got a permit to carry that?

Lori | April 14, 1999

--------------------

Scully: And now, for the alien's final trick. He will astound you with the mysterious 'disappearing Gumby'. Watch Mulder, this is great.

Gumby: Oh #$*&!

Lori | April 14, 1999

--------------------

what's that in your pocket?

Jackson | April 14, 1999

--------------------

In the oddest alien revelation to date the alien ambassador reveals to Mulder and Scully the fact that Gumby is the alien God!

Mulder: Who would've guessed...Gumby....Wow!!

chaotichappenings | April 14, 1999

--------------------

Wow, that's a remarkable self-portraying sculpture... I didn't realize that aliens were such good artists!

MacZeal | April 14, 1999

--------------------

mulder: scully! that alien has gumby!

scully: it IS a conspiracy, mulder, they're trying to lure young children in!

fc | April 14, 1999

--------------------

Alien: "Look at this freak! And humans are afraid of me!!!

KDLENE | April 15, 1999

--------------------

Tragedy today, as beloved children's hero 'Gumby,' DIED at the age of 43. Apparently, he walked into the "x-files: the book" book instead of the "sex-files: with hookers" book, which he had intended to enter. No word yet on the whereabouts of Pokey.

puddlesky | April 15, 1999

--------------------

Here Mulder hold Stretch for me while Scully and I dance the night away!

Sue | April 15, 1999

--------------------

"Okay, you can have the Washington Monument! Just put Gumby down!!"

Mark Swearingen | April 15, 1999

--------------------

Although Scully was willing to go on the double date if it would ensure better relations between the alien colonists and the human race, Mulder felt stupid for having fallen for the "you'll just LOVE my sister, she's short but really very cute" line again...

Cuts | April 15, 1999

--------------------

Thank you for your cooperation sir, we'll take the alien from here.

Brad Wohlers | April 16, 1999

--------------------

Mulder: So Pokey was an alien all along...I had no idea the infiltration was so deep.

Scully: There's nothing deep about this.

jp1245 | April 16, 1999

--------------------

Mulder: Scully, no don't hug him! He's an alien!!!

Scully: Oh Mulder, you and your stupid x-files - how many times do I have to tell you . . . there's no such thing as aliens! Besides - how dangerous can he be? After all, he's holding Gumby!

Astaria | April 16, 1999

--------------------

Scully welcomes her long lost grandfather, who brings with him gumby as a peace offering.

Allybear | April 16, 1999

--------------------

Too many jokes... must not butcher Shakespeare!

Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!

C. H. | April 16, 1999

--------------------

SCULLY: I think it does understand english

MULDER: YEAH, but just a little, I said I was hungry and could go for a bowl of GUMB "O"......

Rick Maier | April 16, 1999

--------------------

After the demise of the Syndicate, the Alien colonists have decided to take a different approach to achieving global domination: turn the inhabitants of Earth into loveable little clay figurines!

Here, Mulder and Scully meet with a new source who shares with them the first successfull human/clay hybrid: Gumby Spender!

Holly N. | April 16, 1999

--------------------

Scully & Mulder at FBI refresher course for hostage negotiation.

Scully ... "O.K. Mr. Dino-Alien! You've shown good faith in returning the clay boy, but we can't even begin to deal until we are guaranteed Pokey is all right!"

mingo | April 17, 1999

--------------------

Frohike dressed as alien: Mulder, I know you've been after little green men for a long time so I have come up with a deal. I'll give you my cousin Gumby here for your beloved Special Agent Scully.

And The Winner Is...

Mulder: "I think it wants to give us something."

Scully: "What's that in its hand?"

Gumby: "I'm Gumby, dammit!"

From the mind of Aaron SlackApril 13, 1999

The Runners Up

Alien: Alas, poor Gumby, I knew him, Mulder. A fellow of infinite jest, of most excellent fancy. He hath borne me on his back a thousand times. And now how abhorred in my imagination it is! My gorge rises at it.

Mulder: There hang those lips that I have wished to kiss so often. (Thinking, while glancing at Scully out of the corner of his eye.)

Alien: Where be your gibes now? Your gambols, your songs, your flashes of merriment that were wont to set the table on a roar? Not one now to mock your own grinning? Quite chapfall'n?

Alien addressing Mulder: Now get you to my lady's chamber, and tell her, let her paint an inch thick, to this favor she must come. Make her laugh at that. Prithe, Mulder, tell me one thing.

Mulder: What's that my lord?

Alien: Why is thy hand upon my lady's very nice asseth? (Ass, in case you didn't know.)

Mulder: It is very nice indeed, but tell me, my Lord, how did you know?

Alien: I know many things, knave.

(With apologies to Shakespeare!)

Alexis Faust & Chris Bally | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Alien (cheerfully): Dana!

Scully (also cheerful): How are you?

Gumby: Hi Mulder!

Mulder: Geez, I hate these Action Caption reunions!

Ludo | April 16, 1999

--------------------

In exchange for a dance with the beautiful red-head, the visitor makes an offering to her partner...

Kathryn | April 13, 1999

--------------------

Don't take candy from strangers Scully, even if it is a licorice allsort.

LIZ | April 13, 1999

--------------------

Scully: Mulder, you know what they say: 'Beware of Aliens bearing gifts!'

Jess Idres | April 14, 1999

--------------------

Mulder: Scully, this proves that Gumby is simply a goverment plot to convince the populace that green individuals are a normal occurrence, in preparation for colonization.

Scully: [sotto voice] Shut up, Mulder, or you get us both eviscerated. [louder] We...come...in...peace. We...love...Claymation.

mobiustrip | April 11, 1999

The Contenders (in chronological order)

Scully: "No, no, no. He said *Samantha*! Not gumby, SA-MAN-THA!"

Mulder: [thinking] "I've really got to work on my alien communication skills."

Kate Anderson | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Alien: "I will trade you this bendable action figure for your partner.. ."

Mulder: "Hell yeah, that's an original!"

Dark Saber | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Unfortunately, Pokey was sick the day of shooting. Here's the next best thing....

"This is my new friend Mokey!"

KidCat505 | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Wait Scully, I think he's trying to tell us something. What is it boy? Gumby's in trouble?!

ms-spooky | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Scully looked at the alien and then at Gumby, laughing slightly.

Mulder: What is it, Scully?

Scully: Aliens are grey, huh? Looks like you were wrong, Mulder!

Mulder: Isn't that that guy from my dream? (points at Gumby)

Scully: Don't try to change the subject!!!

Frodo Underhill | April 11, 1999

--------------------

This week on the X-Files...Scully finds herself mysteriously intrigued by a tall attractive stranger with a rather large gumby.

Adrienne | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Thanks, guys . . . Wow . . . First of all, I'd just like to thank the Academy . . .

Melvin F. | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Scully: Remember, he gets a bowl of kibble in the morning and be sure to walk him by 6 PM or you'll be cleaning up his clay...

Anne Packrat | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Alien: "We have been monitoring the Earth's airwaves and we have made this statue for you of who we believe is your leader, Gumby. Now I am in search of your leader and his assistant, Pookie."

Scully: "No, that's Pokey, and they're not our leaders."

Alien: "It's not pokey! It's true I tell you!" And is that a "poke me in the ribs" crack?"

Scully: "No, the horse's name is Pokey, and you really need to get away from the tv for a while and get something to eat. You need some meat on those bones."

Alien: "I vaporized the last person to make fun of my ribs!"

Mulder: "Uh, Scully, let's not make him mad. I'll take you to our leader Gumby..."

Strawberryshake | April 11, 1999

--------------------

One scene that didn't make the initial movie release: as Scully and Mulder race to escape the disintegrating alien Antarctic breeding colony, they must dodge a recently awakened alien still carrying his sleep toy.

Q | April 11, 1999

--------------------

Scully: The gestation renders the victim's bones porous and jelly-like.

Mulder: Oh no, it has another victim!

From the mind of Aaron Slack
April 13, 1999

The Contenders
(in chronological order)

Scully: "No, no, no. He said Samantha! Not gumby, SA-MAN-THA!"