(You didn't think I was going to pass this one up, did you? ;-) )

Mulder's mental health is on a downward spiral. His descent has been swifter this season than in the past, but he's been heading downhill ever since the pilot. The events of his childhood were like a spring coiled inside him, just waiting to push him over the edge. I think there would eventually have been a crisis no matter how he decided to live his life, but I can't prove that. What I can do is trace how the events that we have witnessed have interacted with his psychological make-up to cause him ever-increasing troubles.

I know some people are going to say "Mulder's been nuts from day one," but there's nuts and then there's nuts. Watch the first couple of episodes again: Mulder is cocky. He wears his X-Files weirdness proudly, like a badge of honor. He's cynical, certainly, but still upbeat. He's excited, happy even, when they lose those 9 minutes. He's wide-eyed with wonder. You don't have to focus on the Angst!Mulder episodes of season 4 to see that those qualities have changed -- it's apparent in every episode (except for maybe Synchrony, which was completely lacking in authentic characterizations).

I want to speculate for a moment (OK, several) about what Mulder's life was like between the abduction and the pilot episode of TXF. Samantha was abducted, laying down the complex web of psychic traumas that has come to dominate Mulder's life. But I think those traumas were quickly compartmentalized and repressed. Not just the facts of the matter (which Mulder is now so obsessed with recovering), but the emotions, too. I'm not talking about total amnesia -- I think that at any point, if you had asked him what happened he would have been able to tell you that his sister had disappeared under mysterious circumstances and everyone in his family was quite distraught. But emotionally, it would have felt like something that happened to someone else, and he would have been likely to deny its centrality in his life. Given his intelligence, charm, and good looks, and his use of this defense mechanism, I think that he probably put together a pretty good semblence of a normal life and normal persona.

And who could blame him for this? Who, in his shoes, would not want to defend himself from such intensely negative, threatening emotions?

(In other words, i do not subscribe to the "Mulder on meds" school of thought that appears sometimes in pre-XF Mulder fanfic -- I think that only recently has he even approached that level of overt suffering).

I wish that I knew what prompted him to undergo regression hypnosis for the first time, because I think that's a *huge* milestone in his development. You don't voluntarily give up a defense that's working well. Maybe being dumped by Phoebe was the precipitating crisis. Given the loss of his sister and his concomitant perceived loss of his parents' love, he is probably extremely sensitive to issues of abandonment. Anyway, something made the old trauma flare up with a vengeance, and he had to retrench, find some new way to protect himself. Given his talents, it's not surprising that intellectualization was his next defense of choice. Turn her disappearance into a mystery to be solved. Focus on the intellectual aspects of it, to stave off the emotional aspects. Also, by trying to solve the mystery of her disappearance, he can deny what he subconsciously sees as his fault in the matter. "See? I never wanted her to disappear! I'm trying to get her back!"

This is where he's at when he first meets Scully. The abduction has taken center stage in his life, and his discovery of the X-Files allows it to be the center of his professional as well as his personal life. But emotionally he seems to be functioning pretty smoothly, just your average brilliant, charming, handsome guy.

He has no idea what's in store for him, both in terms of the external forces arrayed against him, and the internal forces waiting to bring him down.

So. I think it's important to realize just how little Mulder knew about the conspiracy when the show began. His reactions in the pilot seem to indicate that this is the first hard evidence that he has personally encountered, rather than hearing it from other sources. Of course, with the advent of Deep Throat, evidence starts pouring in. Sure, it's all stuff that can be interpreted in multiple ways, but any of the available interpretations should inspire fear, loathing, and paranoia. Mulder would never have made it through those past seasons without Scully; he has drawn on not only her material and intellectual resources, but her emotional resources, from day one. She swiftly becomes part of his coping, part of his defenses, allowing him to proceed along avenues that he couldn't have handled before.

You know that scene in Conduit where he's crying in the church? Most of us probably took that at the time as an indication of something habitual. "Wow, what a caring, sensitive guy -- he's reminded of his sister, and he cries." I'd like to suggest that that may have been the first time since his childhood that he cried about Samantha. Forced by circumstances to confront the trauma more closely than he had before, and buoyed by Scully's support, he finally allowed himself to appraoch his original emotional reactions to the abduction.

Of course, as soon as he has come to depend on Scully, she is taken from him. He can't function without her; a near-breakdown results. His attack on Duane Barry during the interrogation. His disordered sleep (that line in 3, "I don't sleep," always gives me chills). His raw misery and need in 3. His freaking out and finally collapsing in One Breath.

She comes back, he pulls himself together, but he just can't get a break. His work is just one horrifying discovery after another, his parents keep getting drawn into the mess (they are of immense importance in Mulder's psychic landscape) and it appears that they can't be trusted, his life and Scully's life are continually endangered... His limited coping resources are constantly being stretched to their utmost, allowing the underlying long-repressed trauma to bloom, consuming him until he can find some way to resolve it once and for all.

Whew! I could go on in more detail, but I won't! I think this framework provides a good explanation for a lot of Mulder's selfish, unprofessional, and ill-considered behavior in season 4.

The main question is whether Fox William Mulder is obsessed to a greater degree now than he was at the beginning of his X-Files collaborations with Dana Scully. To a point it would appear that this is the case, which can be borne out upon reflection of key episodes this season, and to some degree episodes of the previous three seasons.

In the first season of the X-Files, the viewer came to understand from the very first episode, that FM was an unconventional FBI agent. He was described as brilliant by others in the FBI but had already been judged as quirky and not just because of his uncanny serial killer profiling abilities, which earned him the tag of "Spooky". This moniker proved to be more than just apt for his deductive skills, it reflected the young agent's intense interest in the decidedly "spooky" X-Files nobody else wanted to pursue. In this first season the viewer came to understand the motivations behind FM's passion for these cases, and this had to do with the mysterious disappearance of his sister Samantha who is believed by him to have been abducted by aliens. The emotional strain of having this mental burden was evident early on in the episode "conduit". This would have probably been the first time, FM had come face to face with his past trauma, head on, in an official capacity, in such depth.

It has to be remembered that up until he was partnered with DS, his trifling with the paranormal and the conspiratorial would have been assumed amateur at best. If DS does end up dying after all this is over, she would have left as a legacy, the positive influence upon FM for the need for meticulous acquirement of proof, and not just headlong investigation without necessary cross checking. FM would have been more apt to practice good investigative techniques from his experience in the VSU but it was really his mind that did the work, with possibly other agents doing the necessary follow up. Opening up a new line of investigations known as the X-Files required him to be a little more "well rounded". As the series has progressed, it is evident that FM is more and more unwilling to go through the proper channels, and do things by the book, with the result that DS has been doing more of that, while FM goes off by himself. This has become progressively the case as the fourth season has worn on. It is reminiscent of what The Beatles went through toward the end of their union. They had been a great collaborative team for so long, but toward the end, they were using session players, for the four individual band members. To some extent, FM and DS have been doing the same, working quite separately and only regrouping at the end.

In a certain way, the partnering of the two has lead to some extent to the unhinging of FM's mental state. The beginning of the partner ship had brought the agent a feeling of closeness to another person, something he had not had in a long time. It appeared early on in the first season, that FM had a loner status in the FBI, to some extent cultivating it, as a way of shutting himself off personally from others. To some degree, FM has regressed back to this state, he has felt increasingly stifled along the X-Files time line and gone off on his own path, many times leaving Scully behind. The immense propensity and capacity for guilt on the part of FM, is probably making him more distant toward DS these days after finding out about her cancer. When once her confidence and protection would have been welcomed, now these are being pushed away, however without her grounded nature and influence, he is lost to his demons, as evident in the episode of the same name, where he decides to get his head drilled. He knows he has problems, but he decides to use suspect means of dealing with them, while being in denial about being a victim himself, like some of the other victims in cases he has encountered them in. One that strongly stands out is Lucy Householder, from the episode "Oubliette". FM feels a great degree of empathy toward this character. Lucy's sacrifice for the other kidnap victim, was a perfect mirror of how Fox wished things had been with him and Samantha. He respected Lucy for her actions because they reflect Fox's wish that he had been taken instead of his sister, in the same respect, Lucy carried out what Fox wished he could. It is no wonder that at the end there Fox cries by Lucy's body, as this sinks in.

What the child, Fox, may have undergone after the abduction of Samantha is open to speculation. There may have been a hint of drug therapy for Fox after this traumatic event had occurred. In the episode "Born Again", he appears very angry and hostile towards the drug "Thorazine" being prescribed for the child in that episode who was suffering from behavioural problems. Could FM himself have been subjected to this drug as a child for therapy or treatment for his own behavioural problems or some diagnosed emotional dysfunction as a result of his traumatic experience with Samantha with respect to her disappearance? Or from reading case files with regards to the drug in question he may have come across as part of his psychology course work?

He became a psychologist as an adult. Could this be taken to mean that he possessed an intense interest or need to understand the mind and all its mysteries, traumas etc, due to a vested interest in understanding his own emotional/mind state? The viewer has come to learn that FM is nothing if not obsessed. It would fit his profile that he would immerse himself deeply in this field to perhaps help himself somehow to come to terms with whatever mental nemeses he had.

From the beginning the seeds have been sown for the breakdown or near breakdown to come. Many things have occurred along the way to make him more obsessed than ever before. If he thought he already had a personal stake in all this through Samantha, he must have completely re-evaluated this when he discovered his father was a key player in the project/cover up/conspiracy etc. As if this wasn't bad enough, his mother, who had played the innocent and unknowing up until "Talitha Cumi", may have been involved with evil both ways: on the one hand married to a man heading one arm of a sinister project, and on the other, having an affair with the one who may have been responsible for putting her husband to death, as well as having his own stake in the project. Surely Fox has been milling these events over in his head for a while now. All this in addition to Scully's abduction (his own partner and friend had become a victim), an experience which probably haunts him still, may have taken its toll. All of this has added an even greater strain and burden on the shoulders of FM, with the result that the above may have possibly contributed to FM's partial psychological breakdown, or at the very least, advanced it further than it might otherwise have. The once excitable agent (ref "Pilot"), that jumped up and down after finding out that he and Scully experienced missing time, has been replaced by a world weary man, tired, sad, angry, and thoroughly depressed and disillusioned with humanity, with the grim knowledge he has uncovered, and that there is much more at stake than even he could have possibly realised back in those early innocent days.

Things as they stood up until that point, made the events which occurred in "TFWID" and "Paper Hearts", truly soul searching for the man who is slowly coming to the realisation that things are out of control and duty to his job had to stand aside for more personal matters. The fact that he veiled his personal needs under the umbrella of performing his FBI role in "TFWID" tells us that he has to a degree lost the plot, even his own rules, as stated in "Soft Light" when he told Scully that Det Ryan was putting herself above the case and the job, something he emphatically stated was forbidden, were being ignored for his own personal pursuit. He desperately tried to find a connection with another human being, in his own quirky way (by way of past lives no less), someone who was not Scully. He has only Scully to whom he may confide and identify with. There is no guarantee, however, that the duo discuss personal matters with each other on a regular basis. This no doubt, is damaging to the two of them as both are probably completely isolated emotionally and socially from other people. In addition, Scully herself is unwilling to excise her own demons, and has shown herself to be unwilling to look deep within herself and acknowledge her abduction fully. Fox probably sees this in her and so it seems logical that he would try to connect with someone else instead, or at least try to.

The classic episode, "Paper Hearts", sees him questioning the very belief he has that his sister was taken by aliens. The very thought of him even entertaining the possibility that it may have been explained as something more down to earth yet just as horrible is earth shattering, since from the beginning the viewer has been told he adamantly believed in her abduction and how it took place. This massive self doubt in his memories, which he steadfastly held onto for so long, would have been overwhelming, and this led to his unprofessional course of action when he disregards the safety of himself and others and takes Roche out of prison. He must know the truth-seemingly at that point in time, at all cost. At the end when he is with Scully, he appears very shaky indeed, and the viewer senses that FM's spirit has been definitely broken in some form. His willingness to keep looking for the answers has not waned, in this four years, but his quest now has an even greater edge and desperation to it, than it had in the beginning.

FM is still as focussed on his quest as he ever was. It appears he has even more reason to be so now than when the X-Files first began. He has however abandoned any notion of conducting these investigations, under the guise of a FBI agent. To some extent he has been kidding himself all along. One thing is for sure, however, and that is that now he is tackling these issues more as a man, a son, a brother and a friend, and it has little to do with serving the public as it once did when he first became a FBI agent. The job has allowed him access to resources which have aided him in his quest. Everything he has found out so far has made him even more driven now, now that his family has been found to be so enmeshed in the whole saga. No man is invincible however, crushing blows take their toll eventually and the target falls. The obsessiveness, which has lead, to some horrifying revelations have laid the foundation for a complete mental breakdown, which has already begun.

"M" is for Mulder but does MADMAN lately seem more appropriate? Is Mulder's MENTAL state becoming dangerously imbalanced? How has the definition of Mulder changed during his quest for the truth?

Fox Mulder never had it easy. His homelife was shattered when he was only 12 years old at the time his sister Samantha disappeared. No longer would he hear her call him butt MUNCH. No longer would he have to fight her for control of the TV in order to watch The MAGICIAN. She had simply vanished without a trace and he had been unable to prevent it. Whether his parents said it outright or not, Mulder felt that he was somehow to blame and the remainder of his childhood produced a MALADJUSTED young man. He MOURNED the loss of his sister and never forgot her until he finally found a purpose...a MOTIVATION. He would make it his MISSION in life to find the truth behind Sam's disappearance and maybe one day bring her home. His MANTRA became "I Want To Believe".

After finishing college and joining the FBI on the fast-track, Mulder found himself an apt pupil in the behavioral unit. He had the uncanny ability to understand the MONSTERS he was chasing and could get into their MINDS to understand their MODUS operandi. He was considered a MAVERICK by the Bureau especially after he discovered the X-Files. But Mulder used his abilities to garner enough favor to study the MYSTERIES the case files held in order to begin his true quest for The Truth. On the outside, Mulder appeared to be an arrogant, cocky young agent but he wore a MASK to hide his emotions and his true MONASTIC existence. His time and energy were devoted to his solitary pursuits of MYTHS and MARVELS that others would scoff at...except for one agent. When Dana Scully was assigned to the X-Files division it was a MATCH made in heaven. They built a strong partnership based on MUTUAL respect. With the help of Deep Throat, Mulder's first MENTOR, and the Lone Gunmen, a MOTLEY crew that were indispensable, they set out on what would now become a united quest. Their MOTTO was "The Truth Is Out There".

For several years, the partners toiled in search of MONSTERS, MYTHS, and MUTANTS. They quickly seized upon a new MAXIM. "Trust No One." The X-Files division was yanked out from under them but they endured until one day Scully was abducted. Mulder felt helpless once again, unable to protect the people he cared about but MIRACULOUSLY, Scully was returned to him. Mulder had weathered the incident but all too soon his world began to shift beneath him. It began with the word MERCHANDISE. Spoken by his own father, this word encapsulated uncertainty and MISTRUST, forcing him to redouble his efforts. In search of further information on his father's past dealings, Mulder was directed to a MINE with a MOUNTAIN vault and more clues that became painful to accept. A MIDNIGHT meeting with his MOTHER offered him a piece of the puzzle which only fueled his guilt and he became even MOODIER, if that is possible. His search for truth and answers was now a MONOMANIA.

A METAMORPHOSIS has occurred and the change is not for the better. Mulder has begun to act like a MAROON and MAROONS Scully more often, even ditching her with the MIGHTY MORPHING Bounty Hunter. His temperament is increasingly MERCURIAL and his MORALS appear to be slipping. This is not to say that he's corrupt, but his single-MINDED pursuit of his goal is causing him to MISLEAD and MANIPULATE others for his own purposes. Mulder's sanity is a thin tightrope that he is currently traversing. He has seen MIRACLES and MAYHEM. He has been deceived, inveigled, and his truth has been obfuscated. Mulder has been MANIPULATED from day one and it has now caught up with him. When he uncovers the truth, he may find himself forced to become one of the Cigarette Smoking Man's MINIONS, hiding the truth for the good of MANKIND. Would this potential outcome destroy Mulder? Scully has been Mulder's most faithful ally through all of this and she will be there when the final truth is revealed. Whether he realizes it or not, Mulder's hope for sanity and stability has been standing next to him for the last five years. It's clear to many of us, and hopefully Mulder will soon understand, that Dana Scully is his MESSIAH.

Fox Mulder is not the same man we met in Season One. Scully has weathered some changes herself but she has become a stronger person and held on to her sanity. Not so Mulder. He's been working on a hairtrigger and it seems the gun may have gone off in "Gethsemane". In Season Four, his troubles started in the two-part story of "Talitha Cumi" and "Herrenvolk". Mulder was running around in circles while his ordered world came crashing down around him. He skipped the country once again to go off in search of his sister even as his mother lay on her deathbed. He hasn't had an easy time of late but by "The Field Where I Died" it is quite obvious that he's in a bit of a tailspin. His fairy tale ride in "Paper Hearts" and desperate acts of self-abuse in "Demons" underscore the major differences between the Mulder we once knew and the man we are faced with today. The maverick Mulder of Season One is not completely lost but, if he can't pull himself back from the abyss with Scully's help, we might see the last of the man we once knew and find ourself with a madman.

What are the main differences in Mulder's character that strike a chord with the faithful viewer? One of the most obvious is the transition of his eagerness to a kind of desperation. Think back to his unbridled enthusiasm in the pilot episode when they lost nine minutes at the site of the orange X. Throughout this entire case he was practically giddy at finally finding the evidence that he always knew existed. Sure they had the big boys breathing down their necks, but this didn't stop him from being excited and motivated even further. The truth was out there and he felt he was closing in on it. His eagerness was infectious when he got Scully to experience the thrill of making the dots connect between the seemingly implausible facts of the case. The Mulder we are faced with in Season Four is a much more muted version of that man...and a bit more manipulative. There have been several instances where Mulder presents a potential case in a way that will allow him liberties for his own personal gain and satisfaction. He is playing fast and loose with his authority and is walking a fine line with his professionalism. This is not a fact that is lost on Scully. In "The Field Where I Died" she let him know that she had concerns and in "Paper Hearts" she called him on his physically abusive behavior toward the prisoner. Mulder has become desperate and is acting out his frustration.

Another change has been in Mulder's level of trust. He was never naive, being suspicious of events even in his childhood, but his maxim has changed from "I Want To Believe" to "Trust No One". Of course, he still wants to believe, but the fact is, he and Scully have been manipulated and misled for years and the strain is showing. He has gone from the hunter to the hunted. There is an air of defeat about him. Even in Season Three he seemed earnest in his convictions saying to Scully that he felt more strongly than ever that the truth was in the X-Files. Now he seems to be playing a game of catch-up, always a few steps behind the men who are holding the answers he craves. Mulder's entire demeanor used to express a cocky, self-assured agent who believed in himself whether others did or not. He had faith in his convictions and would find a way to prove them to people, and his main target was Scully. But now it seems that even with proof, the main truths he seeks are beyond his grasp. What seemed inevitable with enough determination now seems impossible or, at the least, improbable. Other than Scully, there are few people he trusts and the structure of his life has been weakened. His sister was taken early, his father is now dead, his mother's life was threatened, and his trust in her is now diminished. If not for Scully his savior, I'm convinced he would be pushing up daisies already.

The final major change in Mulder is a shift from a focused quest to an obsession. I remember in "Anasazi" when Mulder was flipping out on the hallucinogenic drugs in his water supply, he scared Scully with his yelling and arm waving. Mulder doesn't need drugs anymore. He borders on scary with his pathological obsession and his search for Sam and The Truth. "Nothing else matters," he said in "The Pilot". At the time, it seemed to be a positive character trait...the passion and determination. Now it is becoming a bit worrisome. And Scully is not blind to this change. In the past, Scully has joked with Mulder about his mental state. In "Deep Throat" she humors Mulder by saying, "Mulder, you're crazy." In "Jose Chung's 'From Outer Space'" she says, "Mulder, you're NUTS." And in a serious, meandering conversation on a rock in "Quagmire" Scully waxes eloquently on his megalomaniacal characteristics. No more jokes. He's really there, friends and neighbors, and it may be a bumpy ride for the rest of the trip.

I can't help but feel that Mulder's obsession has increased to a dangerous level; dangerous for him as well as others. Losing sight of his responsibilities as an FBI agent, he seems to be using his position mostly for his own ends. He's speeding down a rollercoaster incline and is in serious danger of derailment. Scully has always been there to ground him and offer support of any kind, but she is facing some major issues of her own and may bend under the burden of a maddening Mulder. If anyone can see him through this and bring him back safe and mentally sound, it's Scully. They are each other's support system and have the ability to reach each other across more than this earth-bound plane. If Mulder was able to reach Scully and offer support in "One Breath", then the Dana Scully I've come to respect more and more through Seasons Three and Four will see Mulder safely home.