CHAPTER THREE
Day 4
Once again Deanna Troi, former counsellor of the USS Enterprise, stood at the window of her office overlooking the gardens of the Starfleet grounds. A message from Will had come through in the early hours of the morning. He'd sounded slightly wistful when he spoke. She missed him already. In that Kathryn Janeway was right. Every time Will left, she missed him; the part that completed her life was gone, albeit temporarily.
"But I can see you've made progress, Dee," he'd told her just before closing communication. "How is she now?"
"Coping as well as she could, I should imagine. She is unbelievably courageous. I haven't seen that kind of valour and self-sufficiency in anyone in a long time, considering what they'd been through."
"And they'd been through hell, as I heard."
"Correct. Lost in an uncharted quadrant, a certain element of caution that prepares one for first contact…nothing like that existed. They had no frame of reference, other than - "
"The Federation Handbook."
"Yes," she sighed as Will smiled. "That was their only law and according to their logs, breached from time to time…"
"I understand that one can be driven to contravene the laws. We've done that often enough on the Enterprise… So, how long will you be working with her?"
"I made some breakthrough yesterday. I…today I'm sure she's going to fight me all the way. If it weren't that Starfleet made these sessions mandatory and - "
"And?"
She'd given another deep sigh. "And it is my opinion that she go through with it, Will. She's carrying a very heavy burden; it's weighing her down. It's vital that she start the grieving process. She hasn't had time - "
"It's a damned shame that Commander Chakotay didn't return with them - "
"That's why it's so important that she talks about it. At the debriefings, everything was reported so unemotionally and business-like. An air of efficiency concealing a great, great sadness, Will. I'm…"
"You feel her sadness, Dee?"
" So much of it, I'm afraid I am going to implode…"
"Dee…"
"But don't worry. I have you to talk to, haven't I?"
"And she has you now to absorb her sorrow. It's too great for one person to bear, Imzadi."
"One tragedy too many."
"Imzadi…my thoughts are with you today. I think Janeway needs more than a counsellor right now…"
He had closed communication and left her thinking about his last words. The closest friend Kathryn Janeway had was no longer with her. It was more than just working side by side with deferent crew and senior officers. It was what Captain Picard and Beverly Crusher shared for so many years before he finally proposed to her, unable to bear the thought of parting with her forever.
Kathryn Janeway had stopped the session suddenly yesterday, just after stating that Commander Chakotay had proposed to her. The news had not come as a great surprise, Deanna thought wryly, considering how hard Janeway found it to talk about her first officer, a man who'd been by her side for seven years, one who'd seen with her the dawns and sunsets, the peaks and valleys of worlds unknown to anyone in Starfleet. While it pained her to talk about Chakotay, delivering her conscious thoughts in a stream of heated anguish, she did talk about him, a dark gleam creeping into her eyes, dark and soft...
Still, a proposal, an engagement was nowhere mentioned in the ship's logs, nor at the debriefings.
Janeway had left her office leaving Deanna gaping for a moment. Now, the Enterprise Counsellor waited for Kathryn Janeway to return. A few minutes ago she received a message that Captain Janeway was on her way and would be in time for the session.
That message had come from her sister, Phoebe Janeway. Phoebe was married to a Bajoran woman named Kira Rodea, a first cousin of Kira Nerys.
"Don't worry, Counsellor. I'll carry her there, if necessary. She has to talk about him, okay? She has to acknowledge her pain. It's there and it'll blow her up if she's not going to be careful. My mother swears she'll chain Kathryn to your chair…"
Captain Janeway's mother, stepfather and sister cared. That much was clear.
There was a knock on her door. When Janeway entered, she looked…
"Captain?"
"I didn't sleep last night, if you must know."
"I'm sorry - "
"Don't be. It's your job, remember?"
Janeway made her job sound ugly. It was ugly, she thought, the way she had to delve into the minds and hearts of her charges. It was ugly the way they responded sometimes. Sighing inwardly, Deanna beckoned her to sit down.
"This feels familiar," said Janeway after shifting snugly into the chair. "I could stay here, you know…"
"Captain…"
"You may continue your interrogation, Counsellor."
Deanna closed her eyes a brief second before she gazed at Janeway again.
"Captain, I understand you're bitter. But right now, I have a few questions to ask. You left suddenly
yesterday."
"I apologise for that hasty retreat. I was…"
"Upset?"
"You could say that. I'm ready now."
"Good. The proposal, Captain. You mentioned that you asked that he defer it. Why was that?"
"I wanted it to be on the planet. Xerxes, as I've told you, was so beautiful with its natural vegetation, its waterfalls, its…basilicas..."
"Basilicas? That's the first time you’ve mentioned that there were temples."
"The one tucked away in the first city of Xerxes. The city was called - "
"Thessaly."
"Yes."
"You met with the Chief Legate Oberon Suhl."
"Aye. He pretty much gave us free reign of the first city after we told him we'd explore first before beaming our crew down. He was a very agreeable man. All smiles with hidden agendas. They resemble the Arcosians of the Alpha Quadrant. Anyway, we took the shuttle and moved around in low orbit. About that time, Seven of Nine hailed us."
"Why was that?"
"She and Harry Kim discovered a space time fracture. Seven said if it were possible for Voyager to do it, we could create a wormhole, even an unstable one that could bring us closer to home..."
"As I understand, Voyager was escorted to the aperture of the wormhole by Xerxian battle cruisers."
"Who's telling this story?" Janeway asked acidly.
"I'm sorry. The message from Seven of Nine?"
"She informed us that there were battle cruisers guarding the fracture."
"Why did you not react immediately?"
"I…we…were simply too happy. We wanted to explore the Thessalonian Temple before returning to Voyager. We had to conclude business with Xerxes first. The temple with its massive outdoor altar was…was…"
There was a long pause. Deanna witnessed the way Janeway lapsed into the same reverie of the previous days. Her face contorted in pain. She waited until Kathryn was ready again.
"I - " she swallowed, "wanted Chakotay to propose to me there, at the altar…"
"You were overjoyed."
"Until that moment unaware that trouble was looming."
"I'm sorry - "
"The temple was beautiful, full of white columns interspersed with statues of their forebears. Like Venus, David, you know, the ancient Greek statues - "
"I know."
"Well, there was this altar at the top of a flight of steps, flanked again by smaller columns and in the middle was the centrepiece. Once at the top of the altar, it was…there was a large circle where the centrepiece stood, about ten metres from the edge of the top step. The circle was adorned with beautiful triangular small mosaics, all along the edge. We - "
"What, Captain?" Deanna prodded softly.
They'd both been awed at the simple opulence, the air of sanctity that hovered there. They were alone.
Alone.
"Now, Chakotay," she told him, "you can propose to me…"
"Kathryn, my love, we're on hallowed ground."
"Yes, and what can be more hallowed," she parried, "than you asking me to marry you, right here?"
"He proposed. Then we left, walking towards the shuttle about a hundred metres away. By the time we joined Voyager again, we received another message, this time from the Xerxian Holy Council."
"They wanted to know who the person was who walked on the hallowed circle of the altar…" Deanna said, the details of which had come out of the debriefing.
"Yes. It led to a stand-off between us. Chakotay wanted to go immediately - "
"You stopped him, why?"
"There was no need. We could negotiate our way out of it, I believed."
"But the negotiations failed, didn't they?"
"From the outset. Their law was very clear though we were totally unaware of it."
"They wanted to execute, according to their law, the person who walked on the hallowed circle. How did they know?"
"Something about stepping on it must have triggered an alarm somewhere, as if they were just lying in wait for an unsuspecting person to do so. We - Chakotay was it."
"They had not had a sacrificial execution in a hundred years," Deanna added, quoting from the debriefings.
"Chakotay was adamant that he go to pay the - the price."
She shivered as she remembered their last conversations, Tom Paris's apprehension. She and Chakotay were in her ready room, hammering out a deal. They were certainly not going to remain in the area, nor have anyone be slaughtered for the pleasure of the inhabitants.
"I must go, don't you understand, Kathryn?"
"But, Chakotay, you can't!"
"I must. The penalty must be paid - "
"The penalty is death. Death by - by burning on that very altar! I need you in my life. I've never needed anyone more…"
At that moment, Commander Tuvok hailed them. Both of them left for the bridge.
"Look, Captain…" Tom's voice was soft, tinged with concern.
"Captain Janeway, we expect the person who violated our holy law to beam down to Thessaly. Voyager will remain here until he is delivered to us."
The voice of the Chief Legate, once dripping with sweetness was now hard, edged with disdain. Kathryn noted something else about him. He looked thrilled too, as if he'd silently been waiting for one of them to contravene their law and now they had their victim.
"If we do not comply, Oberon Suhl? What then?"
"Captain, your vessel is surrounded by six of our battle cruisers. We not only outnumber you, our firing power is highly superior to Voyager's. You have no option. Once you have delivered the scoundrel to us, our vessels will accompany you to the wormhole where they'll make sure Voyager goes through to your destination."
"A…wormhole?"
"We have the technology to create artificial wormholes. This one will take you to your home quadrant."
"What? Is that the pay-off? We provide you with a lamb to be slaughtered for your ritual gratification and in return you send us…home?"
"That is correct, Captain Janeway. You have twenty four hours."
The screen went blank suddenly, leaving her stunned. She glanced at Chakotay whose gaze still remained on the viewscreen, though his face looked impassive. What the hell was going on in his mind? Was he going to accede to the Xerxians' demands?
"Chakotay, we can get out of this - "
"Not possible, Captain. You heard them. Don't you see we're surrounded? One move to escape and we're cosmic dust."
She swung round to Tuvok, with Seven of Nine standing on the level just behind the command chairs.
"They are correct about their technology," Seven of Nine declared. "Even if Mr Kim and I can manage to compute a way for us to create a wormhole, we still need the technology of the Xerxians. We cannot do it without their assistance."
Kathryn thought she heard a note of desperation in Seven's voice.
"I can go, Captain. Voyager may be shunted into a sector that will require another two years to travel towards Earth - "
When her commbadge beeped, she hit it angrily.
"Janeway here. What is it, Lessing?"
"Captain, I can go. It would not be wise for either of the captain or the first officer to make the sacrifice…"
"Get this, all of you," Captain Janeway ordered, "no one is leaving this vessel. Do you hear me? Not so long ago, this crew with this man leading you were on the point of mutiny to prevent me staying behind in the void. We came up with a viable solution then. It is possible we can do the same now."
"Unfortunately, Captain," said Tuvok, "they have powered their weapons - "
That was when the first salvo from a Xerxian cruiser hit Voyager on its port bow. The ship trembled in the aftermath, throwing everyone off balance.
"Report!" Janeway yelled.
"Our shields are down, Captain."
"What?"
"Torres to Janeway!"
Janeway hit her commbadge.
"Report, B'Elanna."
"Damage to the hull on our port bow. It will take at least four hours to restore power to get the shields up again."
"Damn."
"My thought exactly. Is there nothing else to be done?"
"None for the moment. We're working on it."
"We can engage maximum warp, Captain. That should put enough space between us - " Paris said.
"What, and limp into the ships waiting near the wormhole?"
"It's worth a - "
The next moment Voyager was hit astern. The ship rocked and teetered before Tom Paris restored balance.
"Damage!"
"Captain, hull breach on decks fourteen and fifteen. Our deflector shield is gone. Some damage to the starboard nacelle," Tuvok's voice droned.
Janeway gave a sigh, swept her hand through her hair and gave Chakotay a wounded look.
He nodded.
"Harry, hail Oberon Suhl."
Moments later the face of the Chief Legate filled the main viewscreen.
"Well, have you made your decision, Captain Janeway?"
"Twenty four hours. You said twenty four hours…"
"Good. We expect your first officer on Thessaly then. Once he has beamed down, your vessel will be escorted to the wormhole - "
"I - "
"That will be all, Captain Janeway."
"They were not ready to negotiate or at least give Commander Chakotay a fair trial?" Deanna Troi asked, her voice pained. Wesley Crusher had once violated a law on Rubicun III and the punishment was death by execution. If Captain Picard hadn't disobeyed the Prime Directive…
"No," Janeway replied. She was again busy twirling the ring around her finger in an agitated manner. "No. No negotiations. Just deliver the perpetrator into their hands."
"What happened then, Captain, in the twenty four hours granted you?"
"My first officer went down to the planet. By the time I woke up, Chakotay was gone. They - "
Janeway swallowed hard.
"They showed his - his body on the altar…burning…"
"That was the last you saw of Commander Chakotay?"
"Yes."
"What happened between you the night before?"
"What, you want me to tell you that we shared my bed? That he loved me, then drugged me so he could go and be the lamb?"
Deanna's face was tight. She couldn't smile, There was nothing to smile about.
"You had an argument, Captain Janeway. Can you tell me what transpired?"
"That night we were in my quarters. We had given the senior officers some assurance that we'd try our very best to deal with the situation. The enemy vessels held their fire. If by the next morning we were not ready to beam someone down - "
"Commander Chakotay…"
"Yes. If we were not ready, they'd destroy Voyager and her crew."
"Chakotay wanted to go immediately and get it over and done with, saying Voyager had a real chance of getting home. What was one life compared to a shipful of lives? The needs of the many outweighing the few."
"Very like Spock."
"I told him that I’d go, in his place. That made him livid."
"Livid? Why?"
"Voyager," he said, "must reach home led by her captain of great valour and distinction. What is a ship if it is not commanded by her captain? That was his issue."
"And yours, Captain?"
"Grandstanding once again, according to him."
"Captain Janeway, much of what you're telling me was never included in the official logs. Is something amiss here?"
"What the hell do you want, Counsellor? A pound of flesh? I died with him, if you must know, There's nothing left of me…in me…except a - "
"Great vacuum filled only with longing…"
"How dare you! Are you my executioner? Chakotay outfoxed me, that's what. When I insisted that I would go in his place, he relented finally…"
Chakotay had given her a long, ponderous look, then narrowed his eyes.
"What…?" she'd asked him.
"You want to go, Kathryn? What then of us?"
"We can still have us," she whispered, her voice sounding strangely otherworldly, as if they were already apart.
"Still?"
"Yes."
"Then we'll have our wedding night, beloved. They cannot take that away from us."
"Never…" she said, her voice muffled as he pulled her closer, and drew her slowly towards the bed…
They made love. It was filled with pain, with anguish, with pleasure, with the knowledge it would be their last night together. Mouths that sought constant connection with great desperation, hands that kneaded, pleasured, caressed. In surreal motion they moved together, sweating bodies joined, sang a melody of harmony, of sanctity. There were tears.
The tears were what she remembered most of that night.
Tears. Her mouth felt suddenly thick, moist. Agitated hands brushed her cheeks and she realised she was back in the present, her hands wet.
"He…"
"He drugged you, Captain, in the early hours of the morning. Before he left, he put his ring on your finger while you were still sleeping…"
"Yes…"
"He knew he wanted to die…he knew. He wasn't going to let me go…"
"No. But it's not over, is it, Captain?"
"What…what do you mean?" Janeway asked.
"I'm so sorry, Captain. But somehow, something is out of place, not adding up. I believe that is the missing piece to the puzzle, the piece that will let you begin the grieving process."
"You think I am lying?"
"Yes, indeed, I do, Captain Janeway."
"I told you everything, dammit all!"
"Now I want you to tell me the truth."
"There is no truth!"
"I cannot agree with you, Captain. The way you're shifting, my sensing of your emotions? All is not right…"
"Isn't it enough that my own mother and sister and stepfather are conspiring against me, now you too?"
"If they do, Captain Janeway, it is solely because they care about you and love you. If I do, it's because I would like to be your friend."
"I have no friends. The only one I had is dead, and I let him die!"
****
END CHAPTER THREE