Buffy's eyes shot open. She had been having that dream ever since she had left Sunnydale, and each time it got worse.

Her eyes filled up with tears and she started crying uncontrollably. "Angel, I'm so sorry." she cried out while the hot tears spilled down her cheeks.

Suddenly the light flicked on. "Buffy?" a worried voice called, "Are you okay?"

Buffy nodded her head as she drew her knees up to her chin. Then she spoke softly, "I was remembering...."

"Angel?" the worried voice asked.

"How could I not remember him? What I did to him?!" Her voice trembled and slowly grew shrill. "Pike, I-I, GOD! Why did this have to happen?!?!"

"Hey, calm down. It'll get easier." Pike comforted.

"No! It won't! It only gets harder!" Buffy glared at him, her voice intense. "Do you know what it's like to have to kill the only person you love? How much it hurts inside?"

"No..." Pike said. looking down at his hands.

"Well I do." Buffy replied. "And every night I see his face, his eyes filled with confusion. I hate myself for I did to him." She ran her fingers through her hair and sighed wearily.

"You need some rest." Pike said as he stood up and made his way to the door. "I'm sorry..." he said as he turned off the light and stepped out of the room.

Buffy drop kicked the vamp to the ground. "Damn it!!!" she whispered. She looked around franticly. Her eyes landed on a long stick. The vampire jumped up at her, fangs bared.

Buffy scrunched up her nose in disgust. "God, Angel never looked that bad vamped out. Neither did Spike. Oh, oh....." She pointed to her mouth. "Um, there's something stuck in your teeth... Did you have a cheerleader for dinner?"

The vampire closed his mouth and looked at her, confused.

Buffy shook her head, "Them cheerleaders, they give you gas you know."

She knew that he was off-guard now. She dropped down and used her hands to spring up. She caught a hold of a tree branch and kicked the vamp. He fell to the ground, hard. Buffy swung around and landed on the other side of him. She grabbed the stick. "Sharp enough." she whispered. The vampire was up again. This time he wasted no time and charged at her. Buffy dropped down into her fighting stance. She did a round-house and delivered three swift punches to his stomach. She punched him in the face before kicking him to the ground. She raised the stake high and plunged it into his chest. The vampire let out a shriek of anguish, then turned to dust. Buffy stepped back and watched the last trails of dust fade away with the wind. Then it hit her. "So much for escaping my destiny." she muttered.

"Pike, it was so, so me!" Buffy exclaimed.

"Well you are the slayer Buffy, of course it's like you to slay." he said sarcastically.

Buffy rolled her eyes at him. "I know. I just though that if I left it would, I don't know, stop or something. But now I realize it's never going to stop, no matter where I am. Here in L.A., in China, or Sunnydale." she said slowly.

Pike looked up, "You going back?"

"Yeah, I think I have to. It's been almost two months, and I miss everyone so much." she said, her eyes filled with pain.

"I'm gonna miss you." he said seriously.

"I'm gonna miss you too." Buffy said, closing her eyes. "I'm always going to be missing someone."

The cold night air made Buffy shiver. The night was foggy, dark, and silent, like the way Buffy felt. She couldn't go home yet, she wasn't ready for that. She knew where she had to go, needed to go.

When she reached Angel's apartment she debated on whether she should go in or not.

Her fingers trembled as she turned the knob. She closed her eyes tightly and stepped in, the door slammed shut behind her.

Slowly she opened her eyes. "Oh God..." she breathed, "It's like he's still here...."

She bit her lip and slowly looked around the room. Her eyes lingered on some objects more than others.

Slowly she began walking through his apartment. She stopped and fingered some objects. Some brought back memories that made her smile, and some made her cry. When she reached his bed she dropped her duffel bag on to the floor.

Then, without warning, she collapsed on the bed and started sobbing. Everything that she had endured in the past year came out in those tears. She cried for what seemed like hours on end.

Then, finally she stopped. She slowly sat up, and with her head throbbing she slipped off the ring Angel had given her.

She stood up and picked up her duffel bag.

"Goodbye, Angel." she whispered as she shut the door, leaving the ring on his tear stained pillow.

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