By now, you're probably wondering something like--"Why in the universe did she blow up the Christa and nearly everyone aboard!?! They're the whole show, for goodness sake!!!" Well, if there's one thing I've learned from watching Star Trek, it's that dead doesn't neccesarily mean dead. There are always loopholes--spacial anomalies, mysterious energy beings, Vulcan Katras and cloning. Very rarely is anyone important gone for good. Except for that one time... (hehehe)
Enjoy the story.

Irony was an Andromedan.

Radu couldn't believe it. His head spinning, he tried to sort out the confusing implications of this discovery. One of his own people had killed his friends. One of his own people was working for the Spung! It seemed impossible, unthinkable. Everything he'd ever known rebelled against the very notion.

But here she was. A girl, barely his own age, her auburn hair now running freely down her shoulders in flowing waves. This was Irony? The famed assassin, renown throughout the quadrant for his--her ruthlessness? Impossible. And yet true.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, he wondered how many more surprises his poor hearts could take. In the past several days, he'd had one shock after another, a succession of startling occurrences.

He was drawn from his speculation by the realization that the conversation had continued on without him. If he was to get any answers he'd have to listen for them now.

Tuning back in, he heard, "So they were all destroyed?"

"Yes, my lord."

"A pity we couldn't save the ship, but sacrifices must be made. At least We have the boy." Shank's face twisted into a cruel smirk. "Warlord Shank shall enjoy disposing of you."

Radu said nothing, still too dazed to manage an intelligible answer.

"Sir," broke in a corpulent Spung by the Warlord's side.

"What about the girl? Shall we put her with the others for now?"

"Yes, of course, and bring the boy as well. Warlord Shank shall need time to prepare before he tortures him to a painful death," he said as casually as if he'd been ordering lunch.

"As you wish, Warlord."

Radu found strong arms on either side of him, directing him toward a side door, then directing him forward. He was hauled down another dank hallway, wondering at his future. Was this truly to be the end--tortured to death by his greatest enemy? It didn't seem quite fair.

He straightened and looked around. The passage was similar to the one he'd been through before, made of crudely hewn rock. The guards were the same, cold, unforgiving Spung soldiers. And Irony was here too.

He looked closer. Odd... The warriors were treating her in the same manner they were him, clenching tightly to her upper arms, eying her suspiciously. Could it be? Is she a prisoner too? he wondered, awestruck. Nah... He dismissed the possibility out of hand. Spung and Andromedans were enemies, the concept ingrained in them since birth. They didn't trust her simply because she was Andromedan, ally or no. That must be it.

He inspected her objectively, curious at her identity. For several days he'd wondered who was behind that mask, the mask that was now clenched tightly in her left hand. Now he knew, and almost wished he could return to his earlier ignorance. She was pallid, so pale she looked as if she'd never spent a day in the sun in her life. Her auburn hair tumbled in waves down her back, uncut in traditional Andromedan fashion, and she was thin. If he had been even slightly concerned for her well-being (which, as he sternly reminded himself, he wasn't), he would have said too thin. He hadn't noticed before; her bulky flightsuit utterly obscured her figure. One might take this fragile appearance for weakness, but Radu wasn't fooled. He also saw the strong, determined chin, the confident walk and straight-backed posture, knew that her body must be well-muscled beneath the flight suit. He would not underestimate her.

Irony turned her head slightly, and caught him looking at her. She returned his stare fullfold, locking eyes with him.

Some say that the eyes are a window to the soul. Whether this is true or not, what Radu saw in those deep blue pools shocked him. So much pain... Her eyes were filled with a lifetime of sadness, anger and regret, yet contained a fire he couldn't help but admire.

His hatred for her slipped momentarily, confronted with those eyes. Quickly, he brought to mind images of the Christa, his friends and family. To his great relief, the wall slammed up again, protecting him. Animosity was all he had left, and he needed it to face what was ahead. He was glad she was suffering--suffering like she'd made him suffer.

"What kind of Andromedan are you?" he asked, astonished.

She looked at him for a long moment, before replying curiously, "What kind of Andromedan are you, STARDOG?"

He was taken aback by the answer, and didn't know quite how to respond.

Fortunately, he didn't have to. At that moment, they arrived at their apparent destination. Heavy Tritanium doors opened long enough for the warriors to shove them inside.

Radu was thrown to his hands and knees, his hair falling in front of his eyes, blocking his vision. Through a haze of flax, he caught sight of figures standing in a loose semi-circle around them. He pushed his long hair back and attempted to stand up. As he pulled himself to his feet, he received yet another shock.

They were all Andromedans! Every single one of them.

What in the...? Radu wondered, as they began to move forward.

"Little One!" cried an elder, as he moved to greet Irony. He mussed her hair affectionately. Others surrounded her and seemed to welcome her home. They all spoke Andromedan, in voices that, for the first time in ages, didn't sound like shouting.

Radu watched all this with growing confusion. What was going on around here!?! It didn't make sense! First a ruthless assassin, then a Spung traitor, and now an accepted member of an Andromedan society, the enigma that called itself "Irony" continued to grow. And what about the Andromedans themselves? What were they doing here--still slaves to the Spung over a decade after the end of the war, far away from the rest of their race?

He stood at the edge of the group staring in bewilderment until someone noticed him.

"Who is your little friend, my dear?"

She turned to him, hesitating a moment before answering, "This is Radu 386. He was onboard the vessel that was my latest mission, and he was...a bit of a surprise."

"Well, whoever he is, he's welcome to our home, such as it is." The woman smiled grimly at this. Being welcome in such a place wasn't anything to be happy about. "You're a long way from home, my dear. We haven't seen another Andromedan for many years."

"Come and tell us of the outside world," urged another. "We haven't heard any news of the war in a very long time."

Before he quite knew what was happening, he was sitting in a story circle with the others staring at him expectantly. There were dozens of them, perhaps fifty or sixty in all. Aside from Irony, none of them were younger than thirty hatchings, and many were far older. They all had a careworn look about them, and most had at least several noticeable scars.

They were waiting for him to begin. He cleared his throat, praying that they would believe what he was about to tell them. "The war has been over for over twelve years," he began quietly. Conscious of their disbelieving gasps, he continued, "The Stardogs beat the Spung back and the hatchery was liberated. We are a free people now, and we've settled a new planet. We've even formed an alliance with the UPP."

They sat in stunned silence for a moment, before breaking into a flurry of speech.

"Are you sure?"

"Is it possible--?"

"I can't believe it!"

He sat, watching their pandemonium in silence. Within a few minutes, they were back under control. "Whether you believe me or not, it's true. All of it." He searched their faces, hoping to find trust there.

They seemed uncertain, wanting to believe him, but at the same time, afraid to. One by one, their gazes shifted to Irony.

After a few moments, she noticed this, and asked indignantly, "What are you looking at me for?"

"Well, you have known him the longest...," someone rationalized.

"For a day or two! And we're not exactly on fabulous speaking terms!"

Still, they looked to her for verification, and she finally conceded.

Great, Radu thought, they want Irony to tell them whether or not to trust me. I'm doomed...and I sound like Bova!He smiled at the thought, then remembered a moment later and his mood came crashing down.

Irony interrupted his musings. "I think we should listen to what he has to say," she surprised him by saying.

It seemed that this was all the Andromedans had been waiting for. With that, they began to rejoice. The end of the war, the freedom of their people had finally come (or at least news of it) and the only appropriate thing to do was to party like there was no tomorrow (and who knew, there might not be).

They danced as if it were a holiday, sweeping Radu up into the festivities, cavorting until the lights went out, signaling the beginning of the sleep cycle. Undaunted, they sang the rejoicing songs, voices blending into a rich tapestry, filling the dank cavern with music.

It was all so much like home that it made Radu want to cry. This is just what they would have done on any major holiday. Sometimes celebrations on New Andromeda lasted for days, the people not growing weary until long after the sun had risen and set several times. Andromedans did not always use their advanced psysiology for warfare.

This celebration, however, was shortened considerably due to some time constraint Radu was unaware of, but could guess at. He had a feeling that the Spung would be coming for them soon enough. He did his best, though, to try to forget that detail, as it seemed the others did.

When they finished their hymns, some began to beg Radu to tell them about New Andromeda. He didn't have the heart to deny them, and suddenly found himself in another circle. He had never liked talking to large groups, not even at home, but did so anyway. As he began, stuttering and faltering, he found himself supremely nervous. Soon, however, as he began to describe with more detail the beautiful blue mountains and oceans, he nearly forgot that he had an audience at all.

He finished, and someone else began telling a story. This one was familiar to him, as it was to every Andromedan child. It was the fable of the wise Rallan(similar to an Earther king or ruler), who lived in the ancient days when tribes warred against each other, and Andromedan killed Andromedan. He looked upon the fighting and saw the destruction it caused. Praying to Yon for an answer, he was given an solution. The Rallan decreed that all Andromedan eggs would be brought to a single location every year, and combined, so that no one would know who their child was, and what tribe he or she belonged to. In this way, no tribe was able to war against another, for fear that they might kill their own brethren.

Radu suddenly found himself wishing that Harlan was here to listen to this. The Earther had assumed that the Andromedan practice of mixing their eggs was to make them better fighters. In reality, it was exactly the opposite. Andromedan eggs were combined to prevent them from fighting at all. He smiled at the thought. Harlan would have--

Harlan! In all the excitement, he'd nearly managed to forget the events of the last few days. Radu felt an instant onrush of guilt. Here he'd been, having a good time, frolicking and singing, while they were...they were... He pushed the thought back. It was time to get down to business.

He located Irony, and pulled her aside. "I think you owe me an explanation," Radu said quietly.

"So I do," returned Irony. "So I do. Come with me."

She led him to a dark corner, sitting down and gesturing in the blackness for him to do likewise.

He sat, and found that he could see nothing, even Irony a few feet away from him was barely distinguishable in the blankness.

He heard a small noise, as if someone was rummaging for something, and then a small light cut through the night. Irony had found a flashlight within one of her many pockets and set it between them.

"There," she said, with a small amount of satisfaction. "All right, ask away."

He opened his mouth to ask, but then closed it, not sure where to begin.

"Wait a moment," Irony said again. She opened a pocket and began to search through it, muttering unintelligibly as she went. She continued through several more, before apparently coming upon the object of her fancy.

"Here it is." She held up a small device, and ran it back and forth around her head, then her shoulders and continued down. Finding nothing, she turned it toward Radu.

"What is that?" he asked, distracted.

Holding a gloved finger to her lips, she proceeded silently. As she ran the device near his midsection, it abruptly let off a low whine. Searching, she experimentally held it near his left arm, then his right, focusing it until she smiled in triumph.

Reaching to his right elbow, she withdrew clutching a small object between her first and second fingers. Holding it up for him to see, she crushed it and dropped it to the floor.

"Listening device," she informed him.

"So they heard everything that's happened?"

She looked at him in surprise. "Well of course! They're forever trying to discover what we're plotting."

He nodded.

"So, where were we? Oh yes, I was just about to give you the answers you wanted." She held up her hands in supplication. "Where would you like me to start?"

"How about the beginning?"

She sighed. "The beginning. I suppose that's as good a place as any." Taking a deep breath, she launched into the tale. "During the occupation, there were those who spoke out against the Spung, those who fought them. All those who were caught doing so were taken away, never to be seen again. It would have been simpler to kill them, but the Spung realized the rebels would become martyrs to the people in death. It was better that they just disappear.

"They built this mining installation and sent them here. Sent us here. Those you see before you are the remainder of the great Andromedan rebellion." Irony looked out at them, thought she could see nothing beyond her small circle of light. Pausing for a moment, she added "I guess they kept us on, even after the war was over, because no one knew about us. They all forgot so easily.

"We were fine for a while, mining away at the asteroid's metal deposits. A couple of year ago, however, all that changed. The asteroid ran dry. There's not much left to mine anymore, just a few leftover mineral deposits. With no purpose to serve, we were of no use to the Empire, which meant..."

"They didn't have a reason to keep you alive," Radu realized.

"Right. We were in a bad spot, so we started to formulate an escape plan. It didn't work, obviously, but it did draw attention to me, since I played a large role in it. This bigshot who was visiting--"

"Warlord Shank."

She nodded. "He noticed me, and decided that I might be useful after all. With my Andromedan strength, stamina, and my own variation of resourcefulness, combined with the fighting skills they taught me, he thought I could serve him well. And so I did." Her voice was dripping with revulsion. "I became Irony, doing his bidding, capturing traitors to the Empire and instilling fear into the hearts of it's enemies. I was a good little soldier. In return, the rest of the community was kept alive until I botch up, and I got to visit them between missions. Some deal, huh?"

Radu didn't know what to say. On one hand, he might have done the same thing if their positions were reversed. On the other, her arrangement had resulted in the death of the only family he had.

"Yeah, right," he replied. "And meanwhile, my friends got killed."

"I had no choice!" She seemed to be almost pleading him to understand. "Shank will carry out on his threat. I've already screwed up once, and someone payed the price..." Irony squeezed her eyes shut in a vain attempt to hold out the memory. "It won't happen again.

"And besides..." She looked furtively around, then brought him closer and looked him in the eye. "Can you keep a secret?"

He nodded. "Of course I can."

"I mean a truly, terribly important one. Even if you are tortured, or dying, you must promise me not to reveal this. It could ruin everything."

"I will," Radu promised again, his curiosity piqued. What could be so important as to warrant this much secrecy? This seeming to satisfy her, she grabbed a nearby blanket and threw it over their heads, forming a makeshift tent.

Speaking in a voice so low that Radu himself could barely hear her, she began, "I'd never killed anyone before. I...I didn't know if I could, so I formed a backup plan."

Radu's hearts began to beat rapidly. Was it possible...?

"When you found me, I was placing devices onboard your ship, but they weren't explosives. I did set some off around the ships outer hull so it would look like the ship itself blew up. It was simple, really--"

Radu grabbed her wrist, the blood pounding in his ears. "Get to the point!" He had to know the truth.

"They're not dead. I didn't kill them. I used a Lumanian miniaturizer on the ship." She fumbled in her breast pocket, withdrawing a small box. Opening it, she showed him the contents. Inside was a tiny Christa, perfect and whole.

"They're alive," Radu said, stunned. "They're alive!" He laughed with joy and relief. Reaching out for the box, he inspected it closely. The Christa was frozen in place, but otherwise seemed fine.

"How do you keep them in there?" They should have been trying to fly out or through it, and he couldn't imagine that the box was strong enough to hold the ship if they did.

"Shhh. Keep your voice down, even the walls have ears." She continued, "The ship and everyone inside it are in stasis. Not a second has passed for them since the explosion. They probably haven't even realized that you're missing."

Radu couldn't stop looking at the Christa. It was certainly a sight for sore eyes. He'd thought never to lay eyes on the ship again. It seemed a miracle.

His joy was abruptly halted when the box was snatched out of his hands. Irony tucked it back into her pocket.

"What'd you do that for?"

"You can have it back again later. First, you have to do something for me."

"What?"

"You'll have to wait and see. For now though," she said, removing the blanket from their heads, "you'd better get some sleep. We've got a long day tomorrow." With that, she lay down and covered herself with the blanket.

Not knowing what else to do, he lay down next to her. With all that was on his mind, he assumed that sleep would be a long time coming. Within five minutes, however, he was asleep and dreaming, tired by the day's activities.

Nearly asleep, he felt half of a blanket slip over his shoulders. Smiling sleepily, he felt his eyes close as he slid into blissful unconsciousness.

The next day truly was long. It was also a day of the hardest physical labor he had ever done.

Spung guards came for all of them the next morning. They were led at gunpoint, going deep within the heart of the asteroid. Radu watched as the others picked up tools and began chipping away at the walls.

Feeling something sharp poking him in the back he turned, to find a guard gesturing for him to start working. Picking up a tool, he went over to stand next to Irony.

"I thought you said that there was nothing left to mine!" Radu whispered.

"There isn't much, but Yung(our Warlord) insists that we get every last bit of Dutronium out of this asteroid. He doesn't believe in wasting slaves."

"You there!" shouted a warrior. "No talking. Get back to work!"

Radu bent his head and started to work.

Several exhausting hours later, he looked up in time to see a rock slide nearly cover an old Andromedan. Several others rushed over to help him, though the Spung quickly hurried them back into line.

"This is dangerous!" Radu whispered.

"Well, duh! If it weren't the Spung would do it themselves," Irony said, equally quiet.

"Why does Shank risk you on menial labor, if he considers you so valuable?" Or me for that matter? The Warlord had seemed extremely anxious to torture him. He had a feeling Shank would not be happy to hear that he had died near painlessly in a rockslide.

"He doesn't know about it. Yung's a little bit paranoid. He thinks he needs as many people in the mines as he can get. So whenever I'm home, I do my duty. Not that I mind--gives me a chance to catch up on things with the folks." She smiled tightly.

Radu nodded, pretending to understand, though it still made little sense to him.

There was little conversation after this, and many more hours passed without mention.

When the guards began to gather them together, Radu looked up with surprise. The work had begun to blur together in a mindless whirl of activity until time had lost all meaning.

He allowed himself to be herded to the door and through the halls, along with the others, back into the large, empty room where they slept.

Feeling grateful that this day was over, he made his way to the sleeping area and collapsed with exhaustion. As he felt a shadow fall over his still form, he cracked an eye open. Seeing Irony, he groaned, "That was the longest day of my life!"

Unsympathetically, she told him, "Well it's not over yet. We've got a lot to do."

As he started to get up, she put a hand on his shoulder, saying, "Get some rest if you're that tired. I've got some things to set up in the meantime." Wondering what she meant, he managed to do so almost immediately, and Irony went over to talk to the other Andromedans.

About an hour later, he was awakened and pulled to his feet. He wasn't at all surprised to find Irony standing in front of him. He was, however, slightly astonished by her next words. "Time to go!"

"Go where? We're locked in."

"Well we wouldn't be leaving if there weren't a way out, now would we?"

Puzzling over the logic of that statement, he was silent for the moment.

Misinterpreting his silence as reluctance, she said, "Listen, I have a plan, but, as much as it galls me to say so, I need your help to make it work. And the sooner we get out of here, the sooner you get you friends back and we get our freedom."

"You're right, I guess. Lead the way." Though Radu still had no real idea what her plan consisted of, he was willing to go along with it anyway. It's not like I have much choice! he thought. He wanted to get out of here as much as anyone.

She went to stand with the rest of her community against the far wall, near a large boulder. As he watched, several people heaved and pushed at it until it was well away from the wall, to reveal a dark hole behind it.

"It's a tunnel to the outside, a way out," someone informed him.

"Gentlemen first!" Irony encouraged. Despite her words, she moved forward to enter ahead of him. Whispering goodbye to her comrades, she stepped inside and quickly moved out of sight.

Hesitating a moment, he suddenly(and rather unfortunately) remembered that he wasn't terribly fond of dark places.

"Coming, Stardog?" Irony asked from inside.

Who knew what horrible things awaited him beyond this cell? He'd certainly had his fill of them so far. But the others were alive, safe on the Christa, and that gave him the courage to face that was ahead.

Swallowing his fear, Radu stepped into the darkness.

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