January 27 - 28, 2001 - All the Rest

ALL THE REST – January 27 & 28

The Blizzard is about to begin. Quotations, facts and words will all pertain to snow over the next week or so!

Today's Quotations — SNOW

Advice is like snow – the softer it falls, the longer it dwells upon, and the deeper in sinks into the mind.

— Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.

— Jeff Valdez

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.

— Doug Larson

At Christmas I no more desire a rose
Than wish a snow in May's new-fangled mirth; But like of each thing that in season grows.

— Shakespeare

I bet when the Neanderthal kids would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick, heavy brows." Then they would all get embarrassed because they remembered they had the big hunky brows too, and they'd get mad and eat the snowman.

— Jack Handey

Today's Word – ALPENGLOW

al·pen·glow :
noun A rosy glow that suffuses snow-covered mountain peaks at dawn or dusk on a clear day

Definitions from American Heritage Dictionary

Today's Fact



Snowflakes

How full of the creative genius is the air in which these are generated! I should hardly admire them more if real stars fell and lodged on my coat.
Henry David Thoreau

The Blizzard Begins -
two weeks of Daily Miscellany SNOW facts.

Snowflakes 1 - No two alike?

It has often been said that no two snowflakes are ever alike. This statement is possibly true, although there is some disagreement on this matter now. At this time the fact is unverifiable, as no one has observed two identical snowflakes (one man claims to have discovered 2 identical flakes, but lacks documented evidence - perhaps it melted).

All snowflakes begin as snow crystals with six sides at the microscopic level. Partially melted crystals unite with other crystals to form a snowflake. The size of the snowflake depends on how many crystals hook together. When it's very cold and snowing, generally the flakes are small, and when it's closer to 32 F. the flakes are often larger. There are myriad's of combinations of this microscopic pattern that are available. Combinations of these variations can make for a nearly unlimited number of snowflake patterns.

What snowflakes actually looked like was not widely known until the middle of the nineteenth century, when the book Cloud Crystals, with sketches by "A Lady," was published in the United States. The lady had caught snowflakes on a black surface and then observed them with a magnifying glass. The uniqueness of each snowflake was first demonstrated by by W. A. Bentley. Mr. Bently was a farmer and an amateur meteorologist. In 1885 Wilson Alwyn ("Snowflake") Bentley, of Jericho, Vermont, began taking photographs of snowflakes through a microscope. He spent nearly 50 years of his life making microphotographs of thousands of individual snowflakes. Thousands of Bentley's photomicrographs were eventually collected in his book Snow Crystals (1931), published by the American Meteorological Society.

A few of the beautiful microphotographs of Mr. Bently can be found at this site.

More about the beauty of the snow crystal tomorrow...

Sources Include: The Handy Weather Answer Book - Walter A. Lyons -Visible Ink Press

You are worthy, O Lord our God,
to receive glory and honor and power.
For you created everything,
and it is for your pleasure that they exist and were created."

Rev. 4:11

Today's SMILE

A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 17:22 (NIV)



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          incredibly simple way to do it, and there is nothing to buy,
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          Follow this simple procedure:

          1) Hold down the shift key.
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A girl went to the doctor's office and said, "Doc, I hurt all over -- whats wrong??

He said "Where does it hurt exactly?

Well it hurts here (points to her forehead with her "pointer finger". And here (points to her chest), Here (points to her side), and here (points to her knee).

The Dr. said "You're a natural blonde aren't you"?

She said "Why yes, how did you know"? It was easy, your finger is broken!!

The town spinster finally died. The whole town knew she hated men with a passion reserved for great causes. It was decided that her will should be read right away just in case of special instructions. Imagine the surprise of her lawyer when he read that she wanted only FEMALE pallbearers! She was adamant about it. "Men did not take me out when I was alive and they for sure aren't gonna take me out when I'm dead!"

From Pat Nordman

A minister was asked to dinner by one of his parishioners who he knew as being an unkempt housekeeper. When he sat down at the table, he noticed that the dishes were the dirtiest that he had ever seen in his life.

"Were these dishes ever washed?" he asked his hostess, running his fingers over the grit and grime.

She replied, "They're as clean as soap and water could get them".

He felt a bit apprehensive, but blessed the food anyway and started eating. It was really delicious and he said so, despite the dirty dishes.

When dinner was over, the hostess took the dishes outside and yelled, "Here Soap! Here Water!"

Gag-O-Mactic Joke Server 3.0

Did you hear about the disaster at a major U.S. University? The scientists were cloning monkeys and one of them blew up. The scientist are trying to determine what went wrong by sifting through the Reeses pieces."

Gag-O-Mactic Joke Server 3.0

A football coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said, "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play."

The player agreed, and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks, "Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this. What is two plus two?" The player thought for a moment and then he answered, "4?"

"Did you say 4?" the coach exclaimed, excited that he got it right.

At that, all the other players on the team began screaming,..."Come on coach, give him another chance!"

A pregnant woman from Washington, D.C. gets in a car accident and falls into a deep coma. Asleep for nearly 6 months, when she wakes up she sees that she is no longer pregnant and frantically asks the doctor about her baby.

The doctor replies, "Ma'am you had twins! a boy and a girl.   Your brother from Maryland came in and named them."

The woman thinks to herself, "No, not my brother... he's an idiot!" She asks the doctor, "Well, what's the girl's name?"

"Denise."

"Wow, that's not a bad name, I like it! What's the boy's name?"

"Denephew. "

TRUE FACT ...

Humans begin laughing at two to three months of age. Six year olds laugh about 300 times per day, while adults laugh from 15 to 100 times per day.

SOURCE: NYT, Dr. William F. Fry, Stanford University

If you wish to make a *real* sponge cake,
BORROW all the ingredients.

Daily Miscellany Comics

Have A Great Day

Phillip Bower

Soul Food January 27 & 28

Today in History January 27
Today in History January 28

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Copyright Information: Phillip Bower is not the author of the humor, and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to the jokes. Sources of jokes are listed when known. Birthday's and Happenings for the date, and quotations are public knowledge and collected from numerous sources. Quotations are public knowledge and sources are listed when known. Weekendspirations are written by Tim Knappenberger who has copyright privileges. Cathy Vinson authors Whispers from the Wilderness and owns copyright privileges. Weekendspirations and Whispers from the Wilderness are used with permission by the respective authors. Other devotions are written by Phillip Bower unless otherwise stated. In all cases credit is given when known. The Daily Miscellany is nonprofit. Submissions by readers is welcome.