ALL THE REST –    May 2
  

 

Today's Quotations – More Last Words

 

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Have you brought the  cheque-book, Alfred?

– Samuel Butlser
1902 English writer

 

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Beautiful.

–   Elizabeth Barrett Browning
After being asked how she was feeling 1861

 

 
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Adiose, compadre!

–  Kit Carson 1868

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Oh, I am not going to die, am I? He will not separate us, we have been so happy!

– Charlotte Bronte
English novelist 1855

 

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France! Army! Head of the Army! Josephine!

–  Napoleon Bonaparte 1821

 

Today's Short Words of  Wisdom



Beware of little expenses; a small leak will sink a great ship.

Benjamin Franklin

 

word puzzle
  Today's Word – INNOCUOUS 
   

 


in·noc·u·ous adjective. 1. Having no adverse effect; harmless. 2. Not likely to offend or provoke to strong emotion; insipid.

It had been a long time since Buck had been in a church. This one seemed innocuous enough, fairly new and modern, neat and efficient.

Left Behind
Tim LaHaye and Jerry B. Jenkins

Definitions from American Heritage Dictionary

 

Today's Fact

 May is frog Month on the Daily Miscellany - I hope you enjoy these facts about amphibians. God is a marvelous architect and his sense of humor and creativity is expressed in these interesting creations.

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Amphibians and FROGS

frogs.wmf (17124 bytes) Amphibians 2

Amphibians are rather widespread on the earth. Only Antarctica, extreme northern Europe, Asia, and North America, and most oceanic islands do not have amphibians. The greatest diversity of frogs is found in the tropics. Although it may not seem so to those living in North America, relatively few amphibians are aquatic as adults. Most salamanders and caecilians are terrestrial. Most of the caecilians spend much of their time below ground, while many frogs and a few salamanders are arboreal.

There are about 4,950 species of amphibians living on the earth at present. The number of species may actually be greater. Many kinds of amphibians are small and secretive. They also occur very locally, or live in unexplored regions of the Earth. During the last decade 80 new species of amphibians were discovered. It is likely that new species of amphibians will be discovered in the future.

It is known that 110 species of vertebrate species have become extinct in the 20th century. It is impossible to know of all contemporary extinctions. Some species have certainly disappeared without ever having been discovered by scientists. According to the 1996 ICUN Red list of of threatened animals: 88 species of frogs and toads are threatened, 15 are critically endangered and 23 species are endangered. The same ICUN list finds that: 36 species of salamanders and newts are threatened and 3 are critically endangered and 8 are endangered. It is impossible to assess just how many species are threatened at a global level. One can only deal with species that are actually known about.

Extinction is a natural occurrence. One species will out-compete another for limited resources. The fear is that extinction is at a higher level now than at any other time in the history of the earth. The most common and pervasive cause of population decline and eventual extinction is habitat loss. Direct exploitation by man is also a cause for extinction. It is a rare cause, but its effects are generally more rapid than habitat depletion.

Let every created thing give praise to the Lord,
for he issued his command, and they came into being.
Psalm 148:5 (NLT)

 

 

clown
Today's SMILE

 

A cheerful heart is good medicine,
but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.
Proverbs 17:22 (NIV)

 
   

 

 

"What sunshine is to flowers, smiles are to humanity. These are but trifles, to be sure; but, scattered along life's pathway, the good they do is inconceivable."

Joseph Addison

 

A FEW SMILES   


Hello Doctor 

The patient shook his doctor's hand in gratitude and said: "Since we are the best of friends, I would not want to insult you by offering payment. But I would like for you to know that I had mentioned you in my will."

"That is very kind of you," said the doctor emotionally, and then added, "Can I see that prescription I just gave you? I'd like to
make a little change" 


A patient in a psychiatric hospital spent all day with his ear to the wall, listening. The doctor watched this person do this day after day. The doctor finally decided to see what he was listening to, so he put his ear up to the wall and listened. He heard nothing. So he turned to the patient and said, "I don't hear anything." The patient replied, "Yeah, I know. It's been like that for months!"


Einstein's Lecture

There's a story about how Albert Einstein was traveling to Universities in a chauffeur driven car, delivering lectures on his theory of relativity. 

One day, while in transit, the chauffeur remarked, "Dr. Einstein, I've heard you deliver that lecture about 30 times.  I know it by heart, and bet I could give it myself."

"Well, I'll give you the chance," Einstein said.  They don't know me at this next school, so when we get there I'll put on your cap, and you introduce yourself as me and give the lecture."

The chauffeur delivered Einstein's lecture flawlessly.  When he finished , he started to leave, but one of the Professors stopped him and asked a complex question filled with mathematical equations and formulas.

The chauffeur thought fast.  "The solution to that problem is so simple, he said, I'm surprised you have to ask me.  In fact, to show you just how simple it is, I'm going to ask my chauffeur to come up here and answer your question." 


A Kiss is just a Kiss

There was a married couple who were in a terrible accident.  The woman's face was burned severely. The doctor told the husband they couldn't graft any skin from her body because she was so skinny.  The husband then donated some of his skin...however, the only place suitable to the doctor was from his buttocks.  The husband requested that no one be told of this, because after all this was a very delicate matter!

After the surgery was completed, everyone was astounded at the woman's new beauty.  She looked more beautiful than she ever did before!  All her friends and relatives just ranted and raved at her youthful beauty! She was alone with her husband one day & she wanted to thank him for what he did.  She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me!  There is no way I could ever repay you!!!

He replied, "Oh don't worry, Honey, I get plenty thanks enough every time your mother comes over and kisses you on your cheek!!





Sometimes it's better if you CAN'T get online!

 


Daily Miscellany Comics

 

Have A Great Day

Phillip Bower

 

Send Mail to pbower@neo.rr.com


Copyright Information: Phillip Bower is not the author of the humor, and does not claim to own any copyright privileges to the jokes. Sources of jokes are listed when known. Birthday's and Happenings for the date, and quotations are public knowledge and collected from numerous sources. Quotations are public knowledge and sources are listed when known. Weekendspirations are written by Tim Knappenberger who has copyright privileges. Cathy Vinson authors Whispers from the Wilderness and owns copyright privileges. Weekendspirations and Whispers from the Wilderness are used with permission by the respective authors. Other devotions are written by Phillip Bower unless otherwise stated. In all cases credit is given when known. The Daily Miscellany is nonprofit. Submissions by readers is welcome.