HUMOR Digest - 18 Dec 1996 to 19 Dec 1996

Date: Wed, 18 Dec 1996 08:29:37 GMT
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Corporate Translator

Universal Corporate Translator
           Part 3 of 3

"A HIGHLY VISIBLE POSITION":
     We can't afford any office partitions, let alone offices

"FLEXIBLE HOURS":
     Work 40 hours; plus whatever your supervisor asks you to

"DUTIES WILL VARY":
     Anyone in the office can boss you around

"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL":
     We have no quality control to speak of

"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE":
     We've filled the job; this ad is just a legal formality

"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE":
     You'll need it to replace three people who just left

"SEEKING CANDIDATES WHO REQUIRE LITTLE OR NO SUPERVISION":
     You're on your own here Bunky; sink or swim

"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST":
     This is a company in perpetual chaos and turmoil

"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS":
     You'll have the manager responsibilities, w/o the pay

"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS":
     Brass communicate, you listen, figure out what they want

"ABILITY TO HANDLE A HEAVY WORKLOAD":
     You whine, you're outta here


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