HUMOR Digest - 18 Dec 1996 to 19 Dec 1996
Date: Wed, 18 Dec 1996 08:29:37 GMT
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Corporate Translator
Universal Corporate Translator
Part 3 of 3
"A HIGHLY VISIBLE POSITION":
We can't afford any office partitions, let alone offices
"FLEXIBLE HOURS":
Work 40 hours; plus whatever your supervisor asks you to
"DUTIES WILL VARY":
Anyone in the office can boss you around
"MUST HAVE AN EYE FOR DETAIL":
We have no quality control to speak of
"NO PHONE CALLS PLEASE":
We've filled the job; this ad is just a legal formality
"SEEKING CANDIDATES WITH A WIDE VARIETY OF EXPERIENCE":
You'll need it to replace three people who just left
"SEEKING CANDIDATES WHO REQUIRE LITTLE OR NO SUPERVISION":
You're on your own here Bunky; sink or swim
"PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS A MUST":
This is a company in perpetual chaos and turmoil
"REQUIRES TEAM LEADERSHIP SKILLS":
You'll have the manager responsibilities, w/o the pay
"GOOD COMMUNICATION SKILLS":
Brass communicate, you listen, figure out what they want
"ABILITY TO HANDLE A HEAVY WORKLOAD":
You whine, you're outta here
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