HUMOR Digest - 28 Dec 1996 to 29 Dec 1996

Date: Sat, 28 Dec 1996 09:13:24 GMT
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Laws of Love & Dating

1. If you meet a woman, and you like her, then she...
    o has a jealous boyfriend 6'4" 280 pounds
    o is a confirmed lesbian
    o only wants to be friends
    o doesn't notice you're even alive

2. About who tries to pick you up; if you're:
    o heterosexual, then homosexuals will try
    o homosexual, then heterosexuals will try
    o bi-sexual, then, no one will try
    o with someone special, everyone will try

3. About finding love; if you:
    o hope you found it, you'll be disappointed
    o think you found it, you're wrong
    o believe you found it, you're misinformed
    o have found it, you won't know until too late

4. About winning/losing; if you:
    o don't have anything to lose, you won't win
    o have something to lose, you'll lose it
    o do win, it's only so you can lose more later

5. If she appears to be having a good time, it's because:
    o she's fanaticizing, and not of you, either
    o she's been eyeing-up someone else
    o she's trying to make someone jealous

6. About dating, if she:
    o arrives with a man, it's the boyfriend she never told you about,
       and he has a few "questions" for ya
   o arrives with her girlfriend, it's because she wants some protection,
       not for anything kinky
    o comes alone, it's because she looks at you as a friend;
       there isn't a chance you'll ever be more either

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