HUMOR Digest - 6 Apr 1997 to 7 Apr 1997

Date: Sun, 6 Apr 1997 03:59:55 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Moore on Mrs. Moore

I'm proud to say that my wife lets me run some things around the house:

errands, the lawn mower, the dishwasher...

I guess I never thought of myself as being a "trained husband" before until I heard my wife refer to me on the phone as "spouse-broken".

A few years ago my wife started to wear tight jeans.
I went out and bought a convertible.

Then she bleached her hair.
I took a lot of multiple vitamin shots.

Just a few months ago, she had a face lift and a "tummy tuck."
I got an implant.

And that's the way its been for the two of us -- side by side -- growing young together.

My wife and I were watching some TV show the other nite where the wife hired a private detective to follow her husband to see if he were in fact "cheating" on her. I asked my wife if she would ever do that.

She said, "Well not so much to find out who the other woman was, but to see if I could find out what she saw in ya."

My wife is what's generally known as a "Strawberry Blonde", which is of course, half blonde/half redhead. Every once in a while though the blonde part gains the upper hand.

On a recent trip to New York, there was a one of those small info signs on the check-in desk. It said: Breakfast 6-10; Lunch 11-3; Dinner 4-11.

She took one look at that and said "How in the world are we gonna do any sight-seeing ? We'll be so busy eating, we won't have time for anything else."

One morning following a tiff, I put my pants on too roughly & ripped the seam along the fly. I looked at my wife and said "I'll wear these today so everyone in the Office will know what I have to put up with."

She said, "No, I'll repair them. I don't want them to know what I have to put up with."

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