HUMOR Digest - 25 Apr 1997 to 26 Apr 1997
Date: Fri, 25 Apr 1997 03:44:13 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Some Sex Jokes
The young widow was kneeling at her husband's grave tending to the weeds, when she felt the grass rustle beneath her skirt.
She smiled and said "Easy sweetheart, you're dead now ya know."
This winter I came to the conclusion that my sex drive is definitely too high. I'd look at a pretty woman and think that: under her coat, sweater, dress, slip, pantyhose and underwear, she was stark naked.
Those of us from my generation often speak of the "good old days". Well, oddly enuff, if the truth be known, we weren't all that good, we weren't old at all, and we're actually talking about the nights.
I can't help but wonder sometimes though why lovemaking is almost always referred to in theatrical terms. For example, surely you've heard men refer to their "performance".
Well, even these days I don't have a lot of trouble with that. But... since I'm now past fifty, the "encores" are getting tuffer and tuffer.
And parents these days seem to want to educate their children to the "facts of life" at a younger and younger age.
I do think however the sex manual that comes with a box of crayons is a bit much.
I'm not saying that my wife was naive when we got married, but...
she thought "kinky sex" involved her wearing hair curlers to bed.
Baltimore City is moving towards licensing all massage pallors. I've already got my application in to be on the Examining Board. And if they follow thru on the plan to also license all the "Strippers" on the world famous "Baltimore's Block", uh, don't wait dinner -- hear ?
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