HUMOR Digest - 28 Apr 1997 to 29 Apr 1997

Date: Mon, 28 Apr 1997 03:58:11 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Welcome to Columbia Maryland...

I guess all organizations have to keep up with the times. I do think though when a troop of Columbia Maryland Girl Scouts sold Girl Scout Croissants this year, that was a bit much.

And where else but Columbia can ya get manicured Lady Fingers ?

They have gone way overboard though with all this stuff about second hand smoke. Columbia Maryland already has the most restrictive laws in the whole Country, I mean seeing as how no one is allowed to smoke within three blocks of an eating establishment.

Now though, most of the restaurants there are adding a non-smoked fish section for diners.

Two Yuppie golfers were making a date to play at one of Columbia's courses. The first said, "I have to warn you though, they don't allow the use of Caddies."

The second said, "No problem. I've always favored the BMW for most course terrains anyway."

Pity the poor sales clerk when the Columbia Yuppette demanded the hard cover edition of "TV Guide".

Two ten year old Columbia boys were arguing as little boys do the world over, each trying to best the other.

The first one said, "My psychiatrist is the strongest man I ever saw. I'll bet he could beat up your dumb psychiatrist with one hand tied behind his back."

"Well maybe," replied the other lil' boy, "But my psychiatrist could cure your psychiatrist of his aggressive behavior in no time; and channel all that energy into productive purposes."

I'm not saying there's an elitist attitude in Columbia or anything. But there are signs on all the roads leading into the city that say:
          "Welcome to Columbia Maryland.
                       Now, go home !"

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