HUMOR Digest - 25 May 1997 to 26 May 1997

Date: Sun, 25 May 1997 03:54:56 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Dating & Relationships

In her own eyes, Peggy was the most popular girl around. "A lot of men are gonna be totally miserable when I marry."

"Really ?" said her date, "And just how many men are you intending to marry ?"

Talk about mixed signals. Did ya ever date a legal secretary ?
I did one time and she told me, "Stop and/or I'll slap your face !"

Dateless and alone, Al was delighted when a lovely young girl sat down at his table in a restaurant while he was in Rio."

"Do you speak English ?" he asked.

"Si, bot jsu'a leetle beet."

"Just a little bit, huh ? How much ?"

"Fifty-five dollar," was the prompt reply.

The sweet young thang telephoned her best girlfriend to complain bitterly about her latest date. "There we were, in his apartment, making love right on the sofa, and someone knocked on the door. And, he had the nerve to get up and answer it."

"You mean he just left you lying there ?" the astonished girlfriend replied, "That's terrible !"

"Actually, I wish he would have," sobbed the girl, "but he took me with him."

The couple had split-up a few months ago, but still remained good friends, which worked out pretty good, since they lived in the same apartment building.

The man slipped on the ice and broke his arm. He met his ex-girlfriend in the elevator and she asked if there was anything she could do to help.

He said, "Well, if it's not too much trouble, could you help me take a bath ?"

She readily agreed and soon was washing him when she saw a gradual erection begin to appear. "Now isn't that sweet," she cooed. "Look Henry, it still recognizes me."

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