HUMOR Digest - 28 May 1997 to 29 May 1997

Date: Wed, 28 May 1997 04:17:13 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Politics

Like a lot of County Councils, ours here in Howard County is filled with rivalries. At one meeting, the old time Republican (Charlie) and the liberal Democrat (Vernon) couldn't agree on anything at all.

The County Executive suggested a cooling off period and a working dinner. Once cocktails were served, Charlie lifted his glass and said, "Vernon, here's wishing to you what you're wishing for me.

Vernon stood up, knocking his chair over in the progress, and shouted, "See everybody, he's starting in again already !!!"

My Grandfather had his own version of most fairy tales. One of my all time favorites starts out "Now the first little pig was a fuzzy-thinking liberal who built his house of straw supplied by the Federal Gov't.

Did y'all ever notice that President Clinton actually gives four totally different speeches each and every time he talks:
     1) What he has written down
     2) What he actually sez
     3) What he wishes he would have said
     4) What he says he meant

Speaking of Clinton, he loves to come off as "one of the guys." The other day he was preparing for one of his famous "chats" and he said to co-President Hillary, "Where's that list of people I call by their first names ?"

And when ole Clinton described himself as "Arkansas' Favorite Son", I wish to assure y'all that that's one of the greatest unfinished sentences of all time !

And ole Hillary's so supportive too. After the last press conference where ole Bill got bombarded with questions about Watergate, she told him that she loved the straight-forward way he dodged all the issues.

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