HUMOR Digest - 23 Jul 1997 to 24 Jul 1997

Date: Wed, 23 Jul 1997 02:36:17 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Real Men !

Did ya ever meet a real Texan who didn't brag ? I was in the DFW terminal and heard a cowboy on the phone. He was obviously there to meet someone and apparently was talking to them direct while they were still in the air: "Ah'll be easy to recognize darlin'. Ah'm tall and lean and tanned -- and besides, Ah'll have a ten gallon hard on."

"Do you have a weapon on you ?" asked the rookie female cop as she searched her first suspect.

"No." he answered. "But if you keep on frisking me like that, I will."

There had been a bumper crop in the county so the rural madam told her girls to get ready for a lot of sex starved, cash heavy farmers to begin arriving that week.

"Oh that's Great !" said one of the girls. It's time for the harvest boon maul again."

"That's certainly an odd statement, Chet." was the comment at a college bull session. "How do you mean girls are like rocks ?"

"The flat ones are better to skip."

As he listened to the troubled young lady lying on the couch, the psychiatrist realized with a start that he had the same urge she did -- to tear all her clothes off.

The high school football star had finally gotten his favorite lil' cheerleader in bed. She couldn't resist looking though...

"Wait !" she said. "What are all those marks on your penis ?"

"Notches." he said smiling.

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