HUMOR Digest - 7 Sep 1997 to 8 Sep 1997

Date: Sun, 7 Sep 1997 06:08:00 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Money Matters

One of life's greatest disappointments is discovering the friendly type guy who appears in the commercials on TV for all of the money lending institutions is not a loan officer at any one of them.

Internal Revenue agent to worried taxpayer being audited: "Yes, Mr. Smith, I'm afraid we do want to make a federal case out of it."

Towards the end of the fiscal year at the Maryland State Highway Administration, budget meetings are held with the various departments quite often.

Sitting in on one such meeting, the Director of Finance asked my boss where he would make his cuts if his remaining budget for the Office of Maintenance were slashed by 20 %.

Without batting an eye, he calmly replied, "Across my throat."

I was trying to help one young woman at work with her income taxes and briefly explained how to complete the forms.

She was totally aghast and said, "They can't tax me on money I've already spent, can they ?"

Man returning home from work to wife: "The good news is that I'm in the vanguard of the fight against inflation. The bad news is that I've been fired in the latest round of downsizing."

Mrs. JimJr and I were dining out at a nice restaurant. I overheard the couple at the next table discussing their bill.

"Well Mary," said the man, "Near as I can figure, based of the price of the ham dinner you just ate, we got a hog back on the farm worth at least $ 137,000."

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