HUMOR Digest - 10 Oct 1997 to 11 Oct 1997

Date: Fri, 10 Oct 1997 03:42:13 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Moore Unexpected Answers

Two drunks were well into their cups at their favorite watering hole, when one spotted movement along the top of the bar.

"Whazz that ?" he asked. "A bug ?"

"Izz a Ladybug." his friend replied.

"Damn," the first man gushed, "you have good eyesight !"

"Wanna buy a ticket for the Warden's Ball ?" one prisoner asked another.

"Sure !" the second replied. "Are there gonna be babes and all at this affair ?"

"It ain't no dance idiot ! It's a raffle."

Billy Joe Jim Bob needed help on the farm, so he hired a young, big, strapling local boy to tend to the chores. Alex John Roy wasn't much of a talker, but he was strong and reliable.

Several weeks after getting familiar with the job, Billy Joe Jim Bob found his new farmhand lazing about the barn at eleven o'clock in the morning. "What the hell are you doin' on your ass this early boy ?"

"Cows milked. Chickens fed. Hogs slopped. Alfalfa gathered. Both your daughters fucked." Alex John Roy drawled. "Nothing else to do."'

During a neighborhood party here, I got into an argument with my neighbor, Van, about presidential politics. Finally, he asked me why I was such a dedicated Republican.

I told him that my Father and GrandFather were Republicans before me and that I was carrying on the family tradition.

"That's it ?" said my exasperated neighbor. "What if your Father and GrandFather had been horse thieves ?"

"Well..." I replied, "I suppose then I'd be a Democrat like you."

  Return to JimJr's Postings Page

This page hosted by Get your own Free Home Page