HUMOR Digest - 23 Dec 1997 to 24 Dec 1997

Date: Tue, 23 Dec 1997 03:46:30 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Men at Work

The efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You might not want to try these techniques at home."

"Why not ?" asked someone from the back of the room.

"Well... I watched my wife's routine at breakfast for years. She made lots of trips between the refrigerator, stove, table & cabinets, often carrying a single item." the expert explained. "I suggested how she might improve the quality of service."

"And did it work ?" the audience member persisted.

"Well... actually yes. It used to take her 25 minutes to fix me breakfast. Now, I do it in eighteen."

Man to auto salesman" "My trade-in is the '95 you went into such ecstasies about when you were selling it to me."

Responding to an ad for Bible salesmen, a man arrived for his interview and said "I w-w-want to s-s-sell B-B-Bibles."

Naturally, the interviewer was doubtful, but hired the man based on his references.

To everyone's astonishment, the fellow shortly had the best sales record in the office. A meeting was called of all of the salesmen where he was to explain his technique.

"It's easy. I just go to the d-d-door and say 'W-w-would you like to b-b-buy a B-B-B-Bible, or I c-c-could c-c-c-come in and read it t-t-t-to you."

Jake and Mike, two second story men, were comparing notes on their recent success of burglaries in Columbia Maryland.

"Didja get anything good on that last heist ?" Jake asked.

"Nuttin' at all." Mike admitted. "Turns out the guy was a Yuppie lawyer."

"Jeez ! Of all the breaks." Jake replied. "Didja lose much ?"

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