HUMOR Digest - 10 Apr 1998 to 11 Apr 1998

Date: Fri, 10 Apr 1998 03:18:35 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Baseball

Baseball season is underway in the US now. I've never seen such salaries for the players.

The other day the Baltimore Orioles manager called the bullpen for a relief pitcher and he got an answering service.

Spring training is always important for all of the players. A rookie was asked the size cap he wore. He replied, "I don't know, I'm not in shape yet."

Early in the season like this players are still not assured they'll remain on the team. One of our pitchers after a really bad inning came into the dugout and kicked the bat rack.

The manager looked over at him and said, "Be careful, you'll break your foot; then we'll never be able to trade ya."

That reminds me of a story when I was a Little League Coach. Parents take the game far more seriously than their kids. I had one boy who was a terrible hitter; no amount of coaching or extra practice seemed to help.

One day he got 3 hits in a row and I asked him what he had done to improve so much so fast.

"Nothing much Coach." he answered. "The other night after I struck out 3 times my Father threatened to trade me."

One vendor was fired at the ballpark already too.

They caught him warming the hot dogs and chilling the beer.

There for a while this year the Orioles looked so good on paper, serious consideration was given to take the grass out of the ballpark and replacing it with Astro-Paper.

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