HUMOR Digest - 5 Jun 1998 to 6 Jun 1998

Date: Fri, 5 Jun 1998 03:44:35 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Driving

Mrs JimJr and I pretty much gave up taking weekend drives.
See, I always had to take Mondays off to refold all the road maps.

Not many people in Howard County walk. Just last week in Columbia,
I saw 3 cars chasing one pedestrian.

Mrs JimJr has improved her driving over the years I'll admit.
When she started driving, she was only getting 40 miles to a fender.

During the 70's I tried that gas and alcohol fuel mix.
The Howard County Police kept stopping me & made my car blow up a balloon.

Always watch out for children on the road.
Most of them are terrible drivers.

I'm not saying we have too many cars on the road in Maryland.
But most of the Bluebirds are really Sparrows holding their breath.

Pollution is already starting here, and it's not even summer yet.
The other day I put air in my tires, and they coughed.

Mrs. JimJr has a Saint Christopher medal hanging from the rearview mirror.
Of course, her Saint Christopher is wearing a crash helmet.

I hate to stop at a red light. When people see my car,
they rush over thinking there's been an accident.

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