HUMOR Digest - 12 Jun 1998 to 13 Jun 1998

Date: Fri, 12 Jun 1998 04:15:03 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Vacation Planning

For those of us in the US, it's time to start planning our summer vacations. Although you can't shoot them any more, you can still get a thrill by photographing animals in the wild.

The last time I was in Africa though, I got a double hernia from carrying around the stupid rhino decoys.

Hawaii is also a possibility, assuming one can afford it. The last time I was there, I got a terrific tan. Near as I can figure, it cost me approximately $65 a square inch.

Japan is another spot worth considering. Be careful in the cities though. They all drive sub-compacts. It's been over ten years since any American pedestrian was hit above the waist.

If you can't stand hot dry air, I'd avoid any country that's mostly desert. At most funerals, they have to prime the mourners. They still do baptisms, but have to use a damp cloth.

In India, it's not uncommon to see people praying in the streets. While we have the same thing in the US, it's pedestrians crossing.

Mexico is famous for all its festivals. I went down there once for the annual Kaopectate Festival.

Once in Paris I told Mrs JimJr that I'd been there four days and hadn't been to the Louvre yet.

She replied, "Don't worry, maybe it's just the water."

But if ya can't get away for a vacation, just tip every third person you see.

It'll be about the same.

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