HUMOR Digest - 2 Jul 1998 to 3 Jul 1998

Date: Thu, 2 Jul 1998 03:33:22 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Ego

I guess one of my biggest pet peeves is people who think they know everything.

If they only knew how much they bug those of us who really do.


Seriously though, even the best of us have some imperfections.

For example, God only granted me average looks; to compensate, He gave me near perfection in brains, talent, wit and charm.


There ! See how irritating that can be ?

Trust me on this one, the thing that increases in size the most on any man when you stroke it, is his ego.


Males don't corner the market on ego either.

I know a Yuppette whose idea of being unfaithful is turning away from the mirror.


What exactly is an egotist ?

Easy -- it's a person who thinks they're everything you already are.


Senior Managers at the Maryland State Highway had some of the biggest egos I've ever seen. Once during a road opening, a bad thunderstorm started to roll in.

At the first loud boom of thunder, five of them stood up and bowed.


The Government is the loser on ego-maniacs though.

Just imagine if they had to pay taxes on what they think they're worth.


But I guess overall, egotists aren't all that bad.

How else could they have a special place in their hearts for themselves.


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