HUMOR Digest - 2 Aug 1998 to 3 Aug 1998

Date: Sun, 2 Aug 1998 03:38:03 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Football

Believe it or not, even though it's still 90-100 degrees in the US, football teams are gearing up to start the season.

This year, the Univ of Maryland is adding another squad to resolve some of the problems they had last year. In addition to offense, defense, and special teams, there will be a squad to attend classes.

Football is supposed to build bodies. HAH ! I never miss a Dallas CowBoy game on TV, and yet I'm still overweight.

Some of the biggest players in pro football are the linemen.

In fact, they're so big, it only takes 3 of them to make a dozen.

At some of the colleges this year, they're trying very hard to come up with an institution of which the football team can be proud.

For those of you who've never seen a football game, eleven men on opposing sides try to move a small object a hundred yards. It's about the same as the US Post Office.

Football, unlike most other sports, is played regardless of the weather.

During one game where it was raining sideways, the team that won the toss said they would "Kick off with the tide."

During a Southern Methodist-Notre Dame football game last year, the SMU people in Dallas yelled their lungs out. Nobody rooted harder than a Priest.

During a break in the action, a fan seated next to him said, "Pardon me Father, but why aren't you cheering for Notre Dame, being a Catholic and all."

"Son !" replied the Priest, "I'm first and foremost a Texan !"

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