HUMOR Digest - 13 Aug 1998 to 14 Aug 1998

Date: Thu, 13 Aug 1998 04:18:06 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: What's in a Name

A Howard County Traffic Policemen recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name.

She said, "I'm Mrs Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan visiting my daughter in Columbia."

The cop put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well... OK... but don't let me catch you speeding again."

On opening day, the teacher was trying to acquaint herself with her new charges. She asked a boy his name, and he replied, "My name is Juley."

She told him, "Please use your formal name until I learn who you all are better. Next time 'Juley', please say, 'My name is Julius'."

The teacher then turned to the next boy and asked him his name. He responded, "My name is Bilious."

At the Cripple Creek Country Club, a steward is going thru the club house area paging a Mrs Zamradoskiovic.

Calling him over to where she was seated, a woman asked, "What's the first initial ?"

During the baptism of a baby, the Minister asked, "And what is the child's name please."

The Father proudly said, "Walter Steven Alfred Nathan Thomas Parker IV."

The Minister leaned over to his acolyte and said, "Uh... go get a little more water please."

The passenger noticed by the license that his cab driver's name was Winston Churchill. Trying to make conversation, he said, "I see your name is Winston Churchill."

The driver simply said, "Yep. That's my moniker."

The passenger, not willing to give up yet on some banter said, "That's a pretty famous name."

The driver responded with: "As well it should be too. I've a-been driving a cab here for over forty years."

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