HUMOR Digest - 20 Aug 1998 to 21 Aug 1998

Date: Thu, 20 Aug 1998 03:27:48 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Not so Blissful

She: "Before we were married, you told me you were 'well off'".

He: "Actually, I was. I just didn't know it at the time."

Since I've retired, I take Mrs JimJr with me everywhere I go.

I figure that's better than having to kiss her "good-bye".

Also being retired, I have more time to help out in the kitchen;

like putting all the fires out for one thing.

Around my house no one ever sez, "Guess who's coming to dinner";

because nine times out of ten, it's the paramedics.

Tip for young husbands: I don't care what the commercials say.

Trust me, there's lots of things you can't say with flowers.

I remember some years ago, the Lutheran Church reworded the Marriage Ceremony & among other things, removed the word "obey" from the Bride's vows.

Mrs JimJr, like a lot of women, was happy to see that promise deleted.

Well... I was OK with it, but only after I'd found out for sure that they weren't gonna make it retroactive.

One of the mysteries of the Bible is God's testing of Job. He took everything away from the poor guy but his wife. For years, scholars have debated why.

Seems to me it's rather simple actually. After God finished the testing of Job, He returned twice what He had taken away.

If He had taken Job's wife, that means God would've had to give him back two wives. Not even God would have inflicted such a severe penalty on Job after all he'd been through.

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