HUMOR Digest - 24 Aug 1998 to 25 Aug 1998

Date: Mon, 24 Aug 1998 03:40:22 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Columbia Maryland

People keep telling me that I exaggerate about the Yuppies in Columbia.

Oh Yeah ? Well, where else would you find people who think filet mingnon is "soul food" ?

And when I mention the BMW's running around in Columbia,

I don't think most of you realize that they're split levels or better.

Even the youngest kids are affected.

The other kids snub anyone who doesn't have at least 2 vice-presidents for their piggy banks.

The two new stores scheduled to open in the Columbia Mall will have elevator music.

No big deal ? Yes, but it's live music !

Columbia also has more "au pairs" per square foot than anywhere else. That in itself is unusual enuff it seems to me.

But when you consider all the au pairs have maids...

Returning home from a month in Europe a Yuppette was asked by a friend how she enjoyed her trip.

"Oh, it was just terrible !" she replied. "The whole place is full of foreigners."

I got lost one time in Columbia and asked a lil' Yuppette for some directions.

She said, "I'm very sorry Sir, I'm unable to assist you. I'm afraid I'd have to point."

Shopping is the town sport for most women in Columbia. One lil' Yuppette was in an "upscale" dress shop and was debating about a rather fancy evening gown.

The salesgirl came over and asked if she could help.

The Yuppette said, "I'm just not sure about this dress, it's attractive, but it's so much less than I want to spend."

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