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HUMOR Digest - 28 Dec 1998 to 29 Dec 1998
Date: Mon, 28 Dec 1998 03:52:10 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: The Human Animal
Dating rule to remember: Nothing can vex like the opposite sex.
In the majority of instances, an argument proves that two or more people are present.
The biggest problem I see with leisure time is to somehow keep other people from using it.
If ya think about it, no one really agrees with other people's opinions unless it's their own expressed in different terms.
Going to a Holiday party with your mate or significant other is much like going hunting with the Game Warden.
Wife berating husband reading paper: "Lee !!! Would you please stop saying 'uh-huh'... I stopped talking ten minutes ago."
Two Yuppettes met for lunch and one was admiring the other's new diamond tennis bracelet. "Anniversary ?" she asked.
"No... fight." the second responded.
A man returning home unusually late was tip-toeing into the bedroom when his wife awoke and said, "Is that you Paul ?"
"Well..." he replied, "It damn sight better be."
For those with young kids, the biggest thrills in vacationing without the kids are: you can eat whatever you want, watch adult TV shows, sleep soundly, and talk in complete sentences.
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