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HUMOR Digest - 30 Dec 1998 to 31 Dec 1998
Date: Wed, 30 Dec 1998 03:37:50 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Happy New Year
About the only thing more depressing than staying home on New Year's Eve is going out.
Wouldn't be neat if in the New Year, all of your troubles last only as long as all of your resolutions usually do.
You can tell if you were at a wild New Year's Eve party if you wake up the next morning with tinsel in your underwear.
Being older, I take New Year's with a grain of salt now -- and 6 aspirin, 4 Maalox tablets, half bottle of Pepto-Bismol...
Being past 50 I often misplace things even on New Year's Eve -- like the last 4-5 hours of New Year's Eve and most of New Year's Day for example.
Mrs JimJr is always after me about being somewhat of a habitual procrastinator. This year, I'm going to surprise her. When it's time to get dressed to go out to a New Year's Eve party, I'm going to stop thinking about what to get her for Christmas.
The wild 60's New Year's Eve party was in full swing. The host told the couples to form two lines; one male, one female. He turned off the lights and told them all to mix-up the order, then get undressed. Then he said, "Find a partner."
On the way home, Sylvia said to Fred, "That was interesting. Odd you should end-up with me though. Did you know ?"
Her husband sighed, and replied, "Yeah ! Of all the rotten damn luck !!!"
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