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HUMOR Digest - 18 Feb 1999 to 19 Feb 1999
Date: Thu, 18 Feb 1999 03:06:43 -0500
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Babies
Pity the poor couple out for the first time since the baby was born and the baby-sitter calls them at the party asking where they keep their fire extinguisher.
Doctors are attributing the record number of multiple births to fertility drugs. I think the problem's because the babies are afraid to enter the world alone -- with the shape it's in.
A man and a pregnant woman get into a cab. The man tells the cabbie, "City Hall, the Wedding Chapel, then General Hospital, and go like Hell, hear ?"
The pregnant woman, tired of all the comments concerning her condition, even from strangers, paused as the salesgirl said, "I see you're expecting."
"Actually, no." replied the woman. "I'm pretty damn sure."
The first-time Father was taking a turn at feeding the baby some strained peas. Naturally, there were traces of the food everywhere, especially on the infant.
His wife comes in, looks at the infant, then at her husband staring into space & sez, "What in the world are you doing ?"
He replied, "I'm waiting for the first coat to dry, so I can put on another."
The woman, already a Mother of four boys, turned pale when the doctor confirmed she was pregnant.
"What's wrong ?" he asked. "Does the idea of having another child bother you ?"
"It's not that doctor." she responded. "I'm thinking of all the soccer, football, basketball and baseball practices as well as the games; the PTA meetings; the clutter of toys; the ..."
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