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HUMOR Digest - 21 Apr 1999 to 22 Apr 1999
Date: Wed, 21 Apr 1999 04:40:27 -0400
From: Jim Moore Jr
Subject: Baseball
The baseball stadium in Baltimore can boast of serving the purest water there is -- an Orioles Ballpark Coke.
Recently a major league player was negotiating a multi-million dollar contract full of annuities, bonuses and incentives. The deal fell thru however when he also demanded $20,000 in cash.
Waiting for her appearance on the Oprah Winfrey show, Pamela Anderson was watching a baseball game on TV in her dressing room. Oprah poked her head in and said, "You're up next Pamela. I had no idea you were interested in our 'National Pastime'.
"Oprah dear." grinned Pamela. "I AM the national pastime."
The Baltimore Orioles with the 2nd highest payroll in all of baseball acquired a well known hitter this year. The man, not known for "getting along" with anyone had a few run-in's with the manager.
The manager complained to the owner who is supposed to have said, "I don't know Ray... seems to me it'd be a lot cheaper and easier to replace you instead of him."
The umpire crew for a baseball game consists of four men. While games have been played with only 3, some crews take an extra man along in the event of injury/sickness/etc. To keep from being bored, sometimes this extra man wanders around the stadium to enjoy the game from different vantage points.
One night, the extra umpire tripped & fell from the second tier of a grandstand. An article in the paper reported on his demise: "The Decline & Fall of the Roaming Umpire."
Indexed UGA Humor Digests 1996-1999:
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