Received 2.9.2000

Dear Closet Atheist, I agree with you about how the modern Atheist is an oppressed group, despite the fact that we are, more likely, a silent majority.  Perhaps your idea about going door-to-door would work.  I mean, when I'm at home in the evening watching porn and drinking beer, the last thing I want is for some Aryan to ring my doorbell and tell me that Jesus Lives and I'm going to Hell if I think otherwise.   I'd be much more obliged to invite the guy in, give him a beer and replay some of my favorites scenes on the VCR for him if he just came by and said "God is Dead...let's party." I'm not implying, of course, that we Atheists have no morals. How untrue. We have much less guilt and a much larger capacity for enjoying this life in the here and now.  Did I say THIS life?  I mean LIFE, baby, cause you only get one.  No one's been able to prove otherwise, I don't care what it says in the Bible.  Give me some FACTS to the contrary and then we'll talk.  Give me that jive about "it says so in the Bible" and I may have to put the hurt on you.   So shut yer pie-hole and stop feeling guilty about all those things that make us human and make life fun.  Dig?

Perhaps we need a parade.  Like gay people have.   Have a big national coming out day for Atheists throughout the world.  Perhaps this site of yours is the first step.  Maybe to ease the minds of those feeling tinges of residual Catholicism, we can offer absolution over the Internet.  Send us a list of your sins, and I'll send you a list of things you can do for me if it'll make you feel better. As far as you boss goes, perhaps a psychiatrist and some good anti-delusional drugs are in order.  And perhaps HIS boss would be interested in knowing that your boss is channeling spirits and spending company time and resources sharing these experiences. Sorry.  I feel like I'm rambling here, but these were some random thoughts that struck me as I perused your site.

Peace Out.

A Fan

My Reply:

Thanks for your note.  If I'm ever in your part of the country I'll stop by to catch some porn, maybe share a bag of Cheetos, and commiserate about the encroachment of conservative Christianity.

C.A.