Received 4.13.2001

I am an atheist, and I have been one for about two years now. I have been attending a weekly Bible school at our local Catholic church for the past two years. Sounds a little strange, no? Now, I am an Italian-American, and the generalization of my race is viewed as being a strict Catholic, as my parents are. My parents have apparently known about my realist views for my length of being a non-Believer, and have been using a strict regiment 
of church and school, as well as a Bible camp every summer when school is off.  Being as respectful as I am, I never really complained or spoke up. But this year I got into an argument with my parents over religion. I wanted to go see a movie with my friends and girlfriend on Good Friday, but my parents would not let me because it was a Holy Day of Obligation (AKA a reason to expect more donations to the church) and they said I had to go to pay my respects to our savior, despite myself having already attended Bible 
school the previous Wednesday and on Palm Sunday. It ended up with me going, but I
refused to enter the church in protest of the way I was being treated. That night I revealed that I was an atheist to my parents and even after they knew, they treated it as though I was just being relentless to win our argument, even after I called them racist many times. That night I got  a huge lecture on being saved by the Lord and on the Ten Commandments (specifically respecting your parents, which I quickly pointed out was
loving your parents), and on being a good Christian. I was being converted in exactly the matter you wrote about in your You will be assimilated! article, and by my own parents.

Later I got an Easter gift basket as a taunt from my parents about being an atheist, and I refused to accept it as a part of my protest. They quickly unwrapped a book titled, "Straight Talk for Young Adults - About Faith & Values" and we all read through the entire 25-some chapter together, all of which was meant to completely brainwash the reader in the usual Christian fashion - as though atheists don't understand it and as though they 
have their own divinity while praying to their God, whom is constantly said to be
all-powerful. They also made me feel as though I was a two-year-old who needed to be monitored and as though I was a simple retarded child who threw fits every five seconds and was not loved by God. I quickly went into my own lecture on that point, quoting various excerpts from your own articles to prove my point. As I finished, I instantly knew I was ignored as they just clucked and said, "you just don't get it." I quickly bombarded them 
with a series of questions that they had serious trouble answering and which I soon
contradicted with passages from the Bible, and then came the big one.

"God loves you no matter what, and he loves all things. He is kind, gentle, good and great." This was a statement as though my eyes were to suddenly open and a halo would appear above my head, and I could almost hear the gates of heaven opening, St. Peter making up my bed for me. I used Noah's Ark as a point of succinctness as I lectured them all on the references to killing in the Bible.

I was again treated in a condescending manner and they said, "I give up." Well, I counted that as one for atheism, but now a page printed from the Internet adorns our refrigerator door. It is shown below. And if you get one thing from this, I want it to be that people are arrogant and ignorant to no end, believing that their own beliefs are correct just because it's what they believe. And now, the supposed coup on my atheistic/"rebellious" "teenage"
ways:

THE ROAD TO SUCCESS IS NOT STRAIGHT
THERE IS A CURVE CALLED FAILURE..
A LOOP CALLED CONFUSION..
SPEED BUMPS CALLED ENEMIES..
CAUTION LIGHTS CALLED FAMILY..
YOU WILL HAVE FLATS CALLED JOBS BUT..
IF YOU HAVE A SPARE CALLED DETERMINATION..
AN ENGINE CALLED PERSEVERANCE..
INSURANCE CALLED FAITH..
A DRIVER CALLED JESUS..
YOU WILL MAKE IT TO A PLACE CALLED SUCCESS!

MAKE IT STOP, MAKE IT STOP!!! Analyze that in great detail to find an relevance to Christian teachings, specifically how Faith "insures" you. I would pay to read that, then I'm going to show my parents just how well thought out atheism can be.

My Reply:

You are at a tough age to realize you're an atheist.  Your parents feel like they are still raising you, but you are old enough to think for yourself.  In a few years you will probably be living on your own and have enough privacy that being an atheist won't create such upheaval.

It might help to try and see things from your parents point of view.  They grew up with Christianity playing a major role in their lives.  They believe it is the source of their values and a crucial part of the foundation that makes them who they are.  Then, their child, the person they feel it is their responsibility to impart those beliefs upon, dismisses all of it.  They are probably panicked, feeling like they have failed.  In addition, they might believe that you will no longer share eternal life with them.  The Christian god is vain and punishes people not only for their actions, but also for their thoughts.  You are going to Hell for changing your mind about His existence.  Your parents are going to Heaven and will spend eternity without you.  This serves as the ultimate justification to do whatever it takes to win you back.  You may protest now, but they feel their actions will be justified in the afterlife.  In Heaven you will thank them for their tenacity.

But there is no afterlife, and the life we have is too short to have our most important relationships burdened by ulterior motives and conversion attempts.

I think the best approach is to work toward mutual respect in the least confrontational manner possible.  Make it clear to your parents that you only want them to respect your beliefs and in turn you will respect theirs.  Debates on the nature of God will only increase everyone's resolve.  I doubt if any true believer in history has ever been convinced that God did not exist through debate.  Most importantly, make sure your parents understand what it means to be an atheist.  You still have the values that they have worked hard to teach you.  You are the exact same person you were before except that you have made up your own mind about God's existence.  Tell your parents that the reason you are not going to go to Church or bible study anymore is because it makes you feel like a hypocrite.

As for faith being insurance, there are a lot of people throughout history who subscribed to that belief too strongly.  They are called martyrs.