What Your Car Says About You






Acura Integra- I have always wanted to own the 
Buick of sports cars   
  
Acura Legend- I'm too bland for German cars      

Acura NSX- I am impotent      

Audi 90- I enjoy putting out engine fires      

Buick Park Avenue- I am older than 34 of 
the 50 states     

Cadillac Eldorado- I am a very good Mary 
Kay salesman     

Cadillac Seville- I am a pimp  

Chevrolet Camaro- I enjoy beating up people     

Chevrolet Chevette- I like seeing people's 
reactions when I tell them I have a 'Vette 

Chevrolet Corvette- I'm in a mid-life crisis     
------------------------------------------------
Chevrolet El Camino- I am leading a militia to 
overthrow the government.     
-------------------------------------------------*LOL*
Chrysler Cordoba- I dig the rich Corinthian leather    

Datsun 280Z- I have a kilo of cocaine in my 
wheel well     

Dodge Dart-I teach third grade special education and 
I voted for Eisenhower     

Dodge Daytona- I delivered pizza for four years 
to get this car     

Ford Escort - I'm a red-headed nanny

Ford Fairmont- (See Dodge Dart)      

Ford Mustang- I slow down to 85 in school zones      

Ford Crown Victoria- I enjoy having people slow to 
55mph & change lanes when I pull up behind them      

Geo Storm- I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.     

Geo Tracker- I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.     

Honda del Sol- I have always said, half a convertible 
is better than no convertible at all      

Honda Civic- I have just graduated and have no credit     

Honda Accord- I lack any originality and am 
basically a lemming.      

Infiniti Q45- I am a physician with 17 malpractice 
suits pending.     

Isuzu Impulse-I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or 
his reports.   

Jaguar XJ6-I am so rich I will pay 60K for a car that 
is in the shop 280 days per year.      

Kia Sephia- I learned nothing from the failure of 
Diahatsu Corp.      

Lincoln Town Car- I live for bingo and covered dish 
suppers     

Mercury Grand Marquis- (See above)     

Mercedes 500SL- I will beat you up if you ask me 
for an autograph.    

Mercedes 560SEL- I have a daughter named Bitsy and a 
son named Cole.      

Mazda Miata- I do not fear being decapitated by an 
18- wheeler      

MGB- I am dating a mechanic      

Mitsubishi Diamante- I don't know what it means either    

Nissan 300ZX- I have yet to complete my divorce 
proceedings.    

Oldsmobile Cutlass- I just stole this car and I'm going 
to make a.... 

Peugeot 505 Diesel- I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List     

Plymouth Neon- I sincerely enjoy doing the Macarena     

Pontiac Trans AM- I have a switchblade in my sock      

Porsche 944- I am dating big haired women that otherwise 
would be inaccessible to me 

Rolls Royce Silver Shadow- I think Pat Buchannon is a 
tad bit too liberal

Saturn SC2- (See Honda Civic)      

Subaru Legacy- I have always wanted a Japanese car 
even more     

Toyota Camry- I am still in the closet      

Volkswagon Beetle- I still watch Partridge Family reruns     

Volkswagon Cabriolet- I am out of the closet      

Volkswagon Microbus- I am tripping right now     

Volvo 740 Wagon- I am frightened of my wife 
  



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