Friday, April 14, 2000

tomorrow is the annual le center yard sale. it's apparently a big deal....i hope so cause i want to make some cash. tonight...if you're near town you can stop on over at the american legion for a community fish fry.......gotta love these small towns. i spent some time in the yard cleaning up and ended up talking to 3 little kids that have taken a liking to kyra bell. got all the dirt on the zoo and the amusement part up by the cities. apparently we have the 2nd tallest roller coaster, it's inferioir only to one in florida, but apparently (according to the little boy) they "cheated" by building their's so it goes underground.
posted by April Fraze 4/14/2000 05:46:59 PM| link

governor ventura vetoes a bill that would establish a 24 hour waiting period for women seeking an abortion. this very bill spurred a flood of over 11,000 calls to the governor's office. they actually had to stop keeping count.

"I have decided it is wrong for the government to assume a role in a decision that is between a woman, her family, her doctor and, if she chooses, her clergy," Ventura said
posted by April Fraze 4/14/2000 05:06:06 PM| link

this could very well be the coolest thing i have ever seen on the web.....the ultimate in entertainment.....check it out. you will not be sorry. i got the link from patti who operates a very insightful and sincere weblog. i must encourage you to read about emma.
posted by April Fraze 4/14/2000 03:11:36 PM| link

all of the news about the ben and jerry's deal made me curious, so i decided to check out their website. i really dig the banner. "if you love something. get it free."

the slogan is in honor of their april 18th, free cone day. it's a nice concept.
posted by April Fraze 4/14/2000 02:24:04 PM| link

Thursday, April 13, 2000

i've had a rather productive evening...the housework is shrinking and i'm fixing to get into an organizational frenzy with my tape collection. putting them in order is a never-ending task...at least when you are actively trading. i, have been a bit behind in my taping for others. luckily i should be getting several new things in the mail soon.....it's like christmas when they come, and my motivation peaks with new music.

i've been trying to finish up a few shows for cameron and skye, but in order to finish up you have to get started and it just hasn't happened yet....maybe tonight i can get my head clear enough to decide what i want to give them.....it's the decision-making that gives me problems.......i can never make decisions. that's the problem with a quasi-critical thinker....you can argue both sides of any equation.

i've been thinking a lot about moving. i think it would suit me to pack my bags and move on down, move on down the road.....

brad is checking to see if he can go...if he gives the word i imagine it will happen.....i've waited so long to get to the mountains...there are no more excuses...and the roadblocks i've fretted over...they're all in my mind.

posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 09:48:51 PM| link

"whenever a state or individual cited 'insufficient funds' as an excuse for neglecting this important thing or that, it was indicative of the extent to which reality had been distorted by the abstract lens of wealth. during periods of so-called economic depression, for example, societies suffered for want of all manner of essential goods, yet investigation almost invariably disclosed that there were plenty of goods available. plenty of coal in the ground, corn in the fields, wool on the sheep. what was missing was not materials but an abstract unit of measurement called 'money'. it was akin to a starving woman with a sweet tooth lamenting that she couldn't bake a cake because she didn't have any ounces. she had butter, flour, eggs, milk, and sugar, she just didn't have any ounces, any pinches, any pints. the loony legacy of money was that the arithmetic by which things were measured had become more valuable than the things themselves."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 07:45:21 PM| link

ok...i'm in blogging mode.....i finished reading skinny legs and all last night, so i have lots of tidbits i want to post....bear with me...i'll be on to something new soon.....can you dig it?
posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 07:33:34 PM| link

"religion was an attempt to pin down the divine. the divine was eternally in flux, forever moving, shifting shape. that was its nature. it was absolute, true enough: absolutely mobile. absolutely transcendent. absolutely flexible. absolutely impersonal. it had its god and goddess aspects, but it was ultimately no more male or female than it was star or screwdriver. it was the sum of all those things, but that sum could never be chalked on a slate. the divine was beyond description, beyond knowing, beyond comprehension. to say that the divine was creation divided by destruction was as close as one could come to definition. but the puny of soul, the dull of wit, weren't content with that. they wanted to hang a face on the divine. they went so far as to attribute petty human emotions (anger, jealousy, etc.) to it, not stopping to realize that if god were a being, even a supreme being, our prayers would have bored him to death long ago.

the divine was expansive, but religion was reductive. religion attempted to reduce the divine to a knowable quantity with which mortals might efficiently deal, to pigeonhole it once and for all so that we never had to reevaluate it. with hammers of cant and spikes of dogma, we crucified and crucified again, trying to nail to our stationary altars the migratory light of the world."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

yes! yes! YES! that's EXACTLY the way i feel....only i didn't say it....i wish i had.....
posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 07:27:50 PM| link

kyra and i just took our afternoon walk through the neighborhood. you would never know that it snowed yesterday. birds are out in full force and i noticed my feeder was completely empty. one house had daffodils in bloom. yet another had those small purple flowers that grow as groundcover. as i made my circles around my own home i was a bit sad that my grass wasn't as green as the ones that had been treated and fertilized by the lawn guy, but i did have dandelions glowing yellow....and that cheered me.
posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 06:56:44 PM| link

"of course, as long as there were willing followers, there would be exploitive leaders. and there would be willing followers until humanity reached that philosophical plateau where it recognized that its great mission in life had nothing to do with any struggle between classes, races, nations, or ideologies, but was, rather, a personal quest to enlarge the soul, liberate the spirit, and light up the brain. on that quest, politics was simply a roadblock of stentorian baboons."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins
posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 06:15:07 PM| link

i just found a sunbeam!!! the smoke from my cigarette makes the neatest swirls. i wonder if there is a way to capture the image.....a new form of art? who knows......
posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 06:11:20 PM| link

"she understood suddenly, and for no particular reason of which she was aware, that it was futile to work for political solutions to humanity's problems because humanity's problems were not political. political problems did exist, all right, but they were entirely secondary. the primary problems were philosophical, and until the philosophical problems were solved, the political problems would have to be solved over and over and over again. the phrase "vicious circle" was coined to describe the ephemeral effectiveness of almost all political activity."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 06:05:03 PM| link

yesterday it snowed......i mean it really snowed! if it were november it would have been beautiful. the snowflakes were the big fluffy kind that tend to stick to each other on the way down making a super flake about the size of a quarter. i watched it out the window and admired the thickness of snow in the air. it wasn't so bad.

the weather continued for approximately two hours and in the end we had a fairly nice dusting. then the sun came out about 6:30 and it all melted away more quickly that it had come. currently it's somewhere around 57 degrees. i believe yesterday's display was our final fairwell to my first winter in minneapolis. i'll kind of miss it.

i am looking forward to spring though. today i ran a small trip to the local library to get a card....then discovered there were no interesting fiction works for me to become enthralled with.....the sad fact of a small town. the one place a person can go to seek out culture and it's poorly funded, pitifully overlooked. not one single book by robbins, kerouac or abbey. i ended up spending a long time looking over the non-fiction. when i left i had a book on tracing your minnesota genealogy for bradley, the natural house book, and the better homes and gardens complete guide to gardening. not bad finds, but less than what i was searching for.......whatever that was.

i swung by the grocery to pick up milk and eggs then ventured home. as i was approaching the driveway entrance i looked at the yard. there i saw the first robin of spring....tittering his way across the lawn. yes, friends, i believe it is spring time in minnesota...finally, but for all i know it could snow tomorrow.
posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 05:37:02 PM| link

"human beings did not have dominion over the plants and animals. every daisy in the field, every anchovy in the bay had an identity just as strong as her own, and a station in life as valuable as hers. to disrupt the daily lives of trees and beasts, to take the lives of trees and beasts (except when necessary for basic shelter and sustenance), to drive a whole species of tree and beast to extinction was arrogant, profane, and ultimately a boomerang honed for suicide.

plants and animals-perhaps even minerals and inanimate objects-were in partnership with humans. moreover, they, not us, were the senior partners, as a result of their experience and their perfection. plants, especially the psychoactive vines and fungi, had a great deal to teach humanity; in fact, if humanity hoped to evolve rapidly enough to keep philosophically apace with its technological advances, the expeditious and postverbal insights provided by psychotropic vegetation might well be its only salvation. in any case, the welfare and wishes of the inhuman must be taken into consideration by any civilization with legitimate chances for survival, although the issue was not merely pragmatic, but moral and aesthetic. humanity was a function of nature. it could not, therefore, live seperately from nature except in a self-deceiving masquerade. it could not live in opposition to nature except in a schizophrenic crime. and it could not blind itself to the wonders of nature without mutating into something too monstrous to love."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

posted by April Fraze 4/13/2000 02:24:08 PM| link

Wednesday, April 12, 2000

i awoke this morning feeling all achy and sore. maybe it's from sitting in this uncomfortable chair...perhaps it's the mashed down futon i sleep on. all i know is i've been hurting. it's times like these i really, really wish i had a masseuse.
posted by April Fraze 4/12/2000 08:21:55 PM| link

thanks to patti for the link to the pollit.com site. i want to come up with a really cool poll, but i have no idea what question to ask. in the meantime i thought i'd check to see how many hopeless romantics there are out there.

Hopeless Romantic Poll

Do you believe in love at first site? yes no Current Results

posted by April Fraze 4/12/2000 08:15:03 PM| link

man, my mom kept asking me if i had heard that dixie chicks song about a guy named earl who had to die. from our conversation i found out that apparently earl had been an abusive husband, blew off the restraining order and put the lady who was trying to leave him in the hospital. mom thought it was a hoot.

i just went to the laundry mat to switch my bedding from the washer to the dryer. it's only a couple of small blocks away and it kind of gives me the creeps sitting there (i've had strange men come in and read the magazines and just sit there when i was in there alone on two seperate occasions) so i usually commute back and forth. no big deal. i decided to thumb through the old issues of farmer magazines and american legion literature before coming home when the infamous earl song came on. it's absolutely hilarious! i highly recommend you listen to it. and i, like my mom, can hardly believe it gets played, especially with the bitterly sang line: "earl had to die".
posted by April Fraze 4/12/2000 04:21:35 PM| link

Tuesday, April 11, 2000

"as long as a population can be induced to believe in a supernatural hereafter, it can be oppressed and controlled. people will put up with all sorts of tyranny, poverty, and painful treatment if they're convinced that they'll eventually escape to some resort in the sky where lifeguards are superfluous and the pool never closes. moreover, the faithful are usually willing to risk their skins in whatever military adventure their government may be promoting. when the sixth veil drops, there will be a definite shortage of cannon fodder.

those in high places are not immune. while the afterlife concept renders the masses manageable, it renders their masters destructive. a world leader who's convinced that life is merely a trial for the more valuable and authentic afterlife is less hesitant to risk starting a nuclear holocaust. a politician or corporate executive who's expecting the rapture to arrive on the next flight from jerusalem is not going to worry much about polluting oceans or destroying forests. why should he?

thus, to emphasize the afterlife is to deny life. to concentrate on heaven is to create hell."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

hmmmm.....not sure how i feel about that. i'm inclined to believe it, but i still have a grain of hope for many. i don't believe this is all inclusive, but it is certainly worth consideration.
posted by April Fraze 4/11/2000 10:15:15 PM| link

Monday, April 10, 2000

i was beginning to feel like a stalker....every day i go to the weblogs i love over and over...craving new updates. now i have a way to avoid being so scary....i just signed up for spyonit.com. now i will get an e-mail when my favorite pages change. pretty groovy, eh?
posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 04:03:52 PM| link

everyone, go on over and tell rick to keep his facial hair. beards rule! he's such a nice fellow and i appreciate the wonderful things he says about this site.....me, wise? hmmmm.....more like idealistic. i'm still working on my guru status :-)

oh yeah, don't you think we need to send some of jonathan's pix over to gq? maybe they need a new cover model......lookin' good jb!!
posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 03:21:32 PM| link

i went to bed early last night and had a very strange dream that woke me up soon after. i wish i could remember it all. the main jist of it involved my mother. i came home and was having a weird sort of acid flashback that i couldn't get out of....my mom asked me what was wrong. i told her nothing trying to avoid the truth until i could straighten myself out. i wasn't on anything, but my eyes were playing tricks on me. mom said i was lying....she could see spots on my hands. i didn't see them, but she seemed to be insinuating that i had been doing something i shouldn't be doing. i looked at her and her face morphed into a contorted mess. i felt my eyes cloud over....i just wanted her to leave so i could pull myself back together, but she wouldn't. then i woke up.

posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 12:45:12 PM| link

april's profound thought:

if i had my way every flower would have 5 petals. that way he'd always love me.

posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 12:25:04 PM| link

yes, i watch friends. i'm not ashamed to admit it. i think one of my favorite lines from the show came about when ben had a barbie and daddy ross was trying to get him to play with a g.i. joe:

"look, ben, a toy that protects u.s. oil interests overseas!"

i nearly died laughing. well, now mother jones is digging up the dirt on the real reason why we're giving aid to colombia.
posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 11:57:33 AM| link

"one thing that she was reasonably certain, however, was that buddy winkler's insensitivity to the beauty in life, per se, was connected somehow to his ironclad conviction that human beings, unlike god, tended to color outside of the lines-and therefore the coloring book ought to be soaked in gasoline and burned. time, in his view, was a short, sloppy path from eve's crayon box to the messiah's fire box."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

just so people know: i am not against god.....i merely question what humans have made religion out to be. to think, i was just discussing "coloring outside of the lines" a few days ago. this part of the book struck me like a ton of bricks. i will never claim to know the bible....but isn't there a line somewhere that calls life the "greatest gift"? maybe that's something i read on a t-shirt, but i have to wonder how that part gets lost in some interpretations. religion for me is seeing a wildflower in bloom. the forces at work on earth are magical and beautiful and undeniably come from a higher power. what the higher power is...that is the mystery. many aspects of religion put forth grand ideas for the betterment of our situation here on earth...honor thy mother and father, love thy neighbor, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. these ideas make perfect sense. harmony is essential if we're going to keep life on earth as great a gift as it can be. i would add: be kind to helpless animals, clean up after yourself, plant a tree and have a garden. many religions lose track of the idea that human life is not the only life....we are not here alone, we are very much a part of an intricate system.

"the smallest sprout shows there really is no death,
and if ever there was it led forward life, and does not wait at the end to arrest it,
and ceas'd the moment life appear'd.

all goes onward and outward, nothing collapses,
and to die is different from what any one supposed, and luckier."

--from song of myself, walt whitman

but please don't take my word for it:

"blow up your tv
throw away your papers
move to the country
build you a home
plant a little garden
eat a lot of peaches
try to find jesus
on your own."

--spanish pipedream, john prine
posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 11:29:29 AM| link

" 'anyone who maintains absolute standards of good and evil is dangerous. as dangerous as a maniac with a loaded revolver. in fact, the person who maintains absolute standards of good and evil usually is the maniac with the revolver.' "

words spoken to ellen cherry by abu.

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

i never thought about it before, but it is certainly true from any stance. gangs use it, religions, politicians (to a lesser degree), even everyday people. abu was talking about religion. i think the pull towards violence over good and evil is stronger in the religious realm..consider jerusalem....
posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 10:59:23 AM| link

hoping to be a better informed voter....i just got my harry browne for president pack. a video, a bumper sticker, a pin, and a newsletter....i haven't decided yet, but i did watch last election when he was chosen as the libertarian candidate. i like the libertarian stance. everyone taking responsibility for themselves. sure, it might cause less goverment support on environmental and welfare issues, but i think we could still find support from caring individuals. if i had anything extra i would donate, but with taxes now, i barely survive. the release of non-violent offenders from prison also make sooooo much sense.
posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 10:46:16 AM| link

i had a wonderful weekend in winona! brad and i went to dinner with his family for his parents' anniversary, and i found that i could totally be myself with them. they are really down to earth people. what a load off my back....and they seem to like me.

that night we went to rascal's and saw tad's band play. i've met the entire band now and this was the first time i had seen them. one word: incredible!!! it was sort of a reunion show since julie and kyle had just gotten back from jackson hole, where they had spent the winter working on dog sled tours. jamie, another friend (and incredibly gutarist), was also sitting in. they are super funky and play a lot of fun stuff. i thought i was going to die laughing when they busted out a rap melody: o.p.p into humpty dance into bust a move. there were probably other songs I'm not remembering in there. in the middle the singer (what was his name?) introduced the band...jamie stepped up to the microphone "i've never heard this song in my life."

good answer!! :-)

posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 10:37:59 AM| link

"spike had spent a quarter hour sweetly assuring her that there was a rational, simple explanation for the spoon's appearance and disappearance, and that someday that which had seemed mysterious would wax mundane. now, it occurred to her, in that event, she would feel cheated. wasn't there a surplus in life of the boring, the repetitive, the mediocre, and the tame? shouldn't she be glad, grateful for this intrusion of the unexpected and unexplained? and if she never understood it, why, so much the better. the surprise and shock of the extraordinary, even when embodied in so small a happening as the riddle around the spoon, could be a tonic, a syrup of wahoo, and she found herself wishing a dose-dangerous side effects be damned-for everyone she knew."

--skinny legs and all, tom robbins

we all need a little mystery in life. we are happiest when looking out trying to find ourselves, religion, true love, a better way. when we find what we are looking for we only need to remember to keep the mystery and magic alive. that's the hardest part.
posted by April Fraze 4/10/2000 10:27:12 AM| link