Thursday, April 27, 2000

i just got home and started reading my daily obsessions before getting back to work. patti has moved her blog, so update your bookmarks. today's commentary regarding the gentleman at the post office is absolutely beautiful. i came immediately to blogger to urge readers to go on over and partake in a bit of sentimental bliss. i cried.

i am often sad at how easily individuals forget their former nurturers. it is a disgrace really. a friend of mine told me how while working at a local restaurant in our town she seated an elderly gentleman at a table for one. he finished his dinner alone and she stopped by to see if he might like his beverage filled. he asked her in a gentle voice if they had complimentary dessert for a person's birthday. she was ashamed to admit that they didn't when he told her he was celebrating his own.

the slightest amount of kind conversation and a sincere ear can amount to the world for many. my grandmother has never had her license and i know how comforting it is for her to hear my voice on the other end of the phone. she helped raise me and i refuse to forget that. i never end a call without telling her i love her.....and i am glad she knows that.

as a girl scout, junior leader, and 4-h member i spent a very large portion of my childhood at the nursing home in my town. we even had our piano recitals there. i will honestly never forget the enthusiasm with which one of the residents sang along with my interpretation of "pop goes the weasel." there were dances and christmas carols. at age 8 we did an adopt-a-grandparent program. it wasn't anything major, but we were assigned a partner and then spent the better part of 2 meetings carefully painting clay flower pots and planting blooming beauties. i was both nervous and excited to see the reaction my gift would receive.

richard was my grandfather that day. he was a very tall gentleman with protruding ears and a powerful grin. he had been around at other times i had visited. when my little hands handed him the pot he picked me up high into the air and kissed my cheek. my heart swelled with joy. three years later when my sixth grade class went carolling through the nursing home halls, richard was trailing behind us....keeping up every step of the way and singing straight from that big heart.

at age 19 while home from college i made my last trip to the home. i was the reigning president of our junior leaders club and over christmas break from college we spent a meeting making cookie ornaments for the residents. that saturday we were to meet our leader and deliver the ornaments. i was the only club member to show. sharon (our leader) and i went in. i went to the rec room, passing out the tiny stockings and trees along the way. a beautiful lady approxiametly 80 years old sat in a wheel chair in the corner wearing a beautiful black dress with a crocheted lace collar. as i handed the ornament to her she took my hand and pulled me close and whispered in my ear: "i remember you, you're the pretty little girl who played piano for us."

i will never forget the residents of todd-dickey....and i know they will always remember me. take you kids to the nursing home.....even if they're visiting strangers, it's still appreciated.
posted by April Fraze 4/27/2000 07:19:11 PM| link

Wednesday, April 26, 2000

hi terri! thanks for the wonderful e-mail. i promise i'll write back!
posted by April Fraze 4/26/2000 12:41:51 AM| link

i should be happy that people find my little space, but i wonder how this referral came about? apparently if you search for ft. collins +nudes on yahoo my site comes up....sorry folks...no nudes here.
posted by April Fraze 4/26/2000 12:38:09 AM| link

if you have an interest in the writings of daniel quinn, please visit the site. there you will find out how powerful his message has been.
posted by April Fraze 4/26/2000 12:26:15 AM| link

Tuesday, April 25, 2000

i finished ishmael today. wow! i wanted to include particularly powerful paragraphs....and i started out doing so. the problem: the entire book was bookmarked. my wish: everyone is required to read this book in order to graduate. it should be up there with romeo and juliet or grapes of wrath. i won't try to explain the main premise...it wouldn't make sense....mainly because the points are stacked like blocks. the argument is too important to minimilize to a few stanzas. if you have any desire to appease me....please, please, please read this book....i beg everyone read it and share it and give it as a gift....teach 100 people and hopefully they will teach 100 more.

i really don't ask for much, you know...hey, jb, i expect a report from you! :-)
posted by April Fraze 4/25/2000 11:36:19 PM| link

i am quite drained today. for the past 60 hours i've had my character undermined over and over and over again....

i am entirely not used to being attacked....and even though what has been said is completely unfounded and untrue, it hurts. i asked my mom all teary-eyed "how could someone say such mean things about me?" "honey, i don't know."

i've always worn my heart on my sleeve. sometimes it is easier to throw up your hands and quit.....when the slams come fast anf frequent it doesn't help to rationalize....it's obvious that nothing you can say will get through. i've hit a brick wall and even though i have rational, well-strung arguments for my actions these past couple of days, one's that will give me a large clearance over the wall....the energy to put them out is entirely wasted.....don't waste your breath to save your face...it has never been so true.
posted by April Fraze 4/25/2000 11:23:12 PM| link

Monday, April 24, 2000

this weekend i was told that i was about as deep as a piece of paper....the truth is out kids.......

by the way....it was an insult intended to hurt me. but you see, i know better. i've always had a problem with character insults before, but this one slid right off my back.
posted by April Fraze 4/24/2000 09:59:48 PM| link

oh yeah, i am waaaaayyyyyy behind on e-mail...i promise i'll get back to everyone, but first...i need to clear my head and get a few things taken care of......please don't give up on me :-)
posted by April Fraze 4/24/2000 09:47:56 PM| link

ugh!! i got an hour's worth of sleep tonight and i can totally feel it. days like this are tolerated with the help of dr. pepper and cigarettes...lots and lots of dr. pepper and many, many cigarettes....i know, it's a dirty habit.

today i opened my office....the first day, it has finally happened. i narrowly averted traffic tickets on 3 occurrences....that made it a good day. #1 i had to stop by kinko's this morning to print the data (my printer is on the fritz)...i parked in a bus loading zone (by accident)...hey, i paid the meter. those indiana plates got me off with a courtesy warning. #2 i had to park in a metered area this morning due to the fact that i was runnning a bit late and didn't want to push it by walking the 3 blocks from the parking lot to the building carrying "the box" - this box includes all of the junk i've been relaying between my house and the office for the past 4 months. when i came out to leave for lunch my meter was dry. i approached my car just as the parking police drove up. the little guy in the driver seat shouts out the window....."hey, you got to put money in the meter"....me: "i'm leaving"....duh! #3 i tried that parking lot after lunch only to see that it was a quarter only lot.....argh!!!! so, back to my meter with my 50 cents. that bought me an hour. i found a meter with 36 minutes on it, then came back out later when i got a dollar worth of quarters from the convenience stand downstairs. i had until 4:00PM. at 4:00 i decided to suck it up and eat the ticket. i was tired of the great quarter hunt anyway. luckily they missed me. what luck.
posted by April Fraze 4/24/2000 09:45:26 PM| link