Monday, May 29, 2000

i love those people who defy the stereotypes.

last week i stopped at a fast food restaurant for lunch while i was away from the office....just my way of prolonging my absence...it's a legitimate excuse. as i stood in line a long string of people sauntered in...the forgotten people. those instintutionalized older civilians who are unable to look after themselves and "too much trouble" for their busy families. i smiled and found myself happy to be in their presence. it was an opportunity for me. i guess in a selfish way i expect to learn from them. to gain an ounce of respect for their trials and a great deal of joy from their smiles.

i found myself unable to pass up the chance to make small talk with a rather short older gentleman who was obviously the buddy. he was a leader in his mind and conversation for those present....he was a helper and a gentle heart. he spoke with the bus driver and myself and took a seat at the tables with the others. the bus driver stood behind me in line and i turned around to smile. i was overwhelmed with happiness. this young man stood behind me: ponytail down his back, salmon colored pants and a white high-collar soccer t-shirt with long sleeves...."rocker" i thought....he had on shades and a stocking cap and if he weren't there behind me you might picture his presence at a mosh pit at an alice in chains concert.....a regular rough kid. he was cordial and polite as he ordered 8 small sodas for his posse.

i situated myself in a booth facing the crowd so i could watch...it's what i do. the dynamics of social relationships alter so much of my emotion that i couldn't resist. a really good interaction can have me soaring for days.....the young man took a seat right in the midst of his charges. he made sure everyone had their choice in drink and if they were able, they poured it themselves. no one had narrowed options. they chatted a bit about the cleanliness of the bathrooms and how someone had put papertowels in the urinal and i smiled to myself.

then the driver asked everyone if they needed a refill or to stop by the restroom...because "well, we're going to be late if we don't get going."

so often you see people in these types of jobs who situate themselves on a plane rising above those they "care for" (for lack of a better phrase). it's in all interactions....the corporate ceo who doesn't hear the idea of the new guy because he's just out of college and still green...or the doctor who doesn't hear your complaint of pain because he looks at this stuff everyday and after all, even though it's your own body, it's only one body, or the probation officer who assumes your as rotten as any rapist for getting busted with pot even though it was only an eighth and it was for personal use.....or the social worker who assigns each case a number, then grows hardened to their contents...referring to clients as "these people."

i prefer the people who get in the mix.....who interact and listen to their clients/co-workers.....who know them intimately and understand their different "up tos"...we all have the "up tos" ....what we were doing befor we got "up to" this point in our life....and without a small amount of this knowledge you're blind to what you have in front of you....sometimes it's difficult to keep that in mind...so, when i saw the young man, who possibly was into rock, i was happy to see that somewhere back in his "up tos" he was taught love...and respect...and how to learn from those he was with....and his difference might possible be the exception to the rule for many people he encounters in his career....and it could very possibly be the world to one person....and that's all that matters really, isn't it?

"we've all seen a man at the liquor store beggin' for your change the hair on his face is dirty, dread-locked, and full of mange he asks a man for what he could spare, with shame in his eyes 'get a job you fucking slob,' is all he replies god forbid you ever had to walk a mile in his shoes 'cause then you really might know what it's like to sing the blues ."

--what it's like, everlast
posted by April Fraze 5/29/2000 11:14:16 AM| link