***

Hamburgers and beer
with a side of onion rings
Weekend breaks like wind

***

Deb is ravishing
Melissa is gorgeous, too
Impartial judges

***

My haiku does not
have the right number of beats.
Disqualified.

***

Disconnected.... Nooo!
"TSO ID in use"
Help desk laughs at you

***

Mother Nature's law
Big job due, blue screen of death
Need a martini

***

Haiku overload
Poems making judges ga-ga
Friday come quickly

***

Yes, Yes Virginia
There is a haiku contest
Get with the program

***

The moon pulls the tide
The waves overflow the beach
This chair hurts my ass

***

What's for lunch today?
Superosa once again
Doug's smile says it all

***

Entrust my haikus
Not to MathGirl's secure care
But to Douglas Reed

***

m and ms yummy
when they sit in my tummy
me eat them all day

***

chocolate cookies
i love to smell them bake
please, i need some milk

***

How my life has changed
Mouse pad; keyboard; monitor
I miss my crayons

***

Snack shop here we come
Wendi sighs; our faces glum
break time is done now...

***

A hot summer's night
She whispered, "Passion consumes.
Transform me, N. Dean!"

***

Construction worker.
Cop. Indian. The Cowboy.
Y.M.C.A. full

***

I like June Cleaver
Son Wally and Friend Eddie
And Nerd Boy Beaver

***

T. Beaver Cleaver
4 8 5 Mapleton Drive
Mayfield, USA

***

Ward is very stern
The rodent must be punished
June enjoys a bath

***

New Jersey Turnpike
Thousands killed by a large dash
The Hyphen has struck

***

Happy Hour fond thoughts
Light glinting off frosted mugs
Hops growing in fields

***

under chestnut tree
the village smithy drinking
amid computers

***

The Lady in White
Mysterious to behold
Flits through the garden

***

Have a great weekend!
Go for a drive in the snow!
Relax and Refresh.

***

To haiku or not
That is the question pondered
'Tis nobler to STOP

***

Fresh new buds of life
Golden yellow daffodils
My favorite season

***

Ghastly grim haikus.
Quoth the judges, 'Nevermore!
Block the e-mail door!'

***

It's Wendi's birthday
Let's celebrate together
Group lunch pizza hut

***

on wisconsin on
green hills filled with big brown cows
fight right through that line

***

like wheat in the field
Gently waving "Hello there"
The want ads beckon

***

one two three four five
one two three four five six sev
Arithmetic hard

***

what is a rock like
a rock is extremely hard
such is its nature

***

the Botswanan disk
Like a cow chip on the ice
Hello minus ten

***

anti Botswanan
the poet deeply offends me
has this person no shame?

***

Procrastination
Tax man calls, Smooth Dave must file
Else, state pen and fine

***

silver hunk of junk
hello, little green jetta
no more sable woes

***

Fully kraeusened brew
pure artesian spring water
Old Style in a can

***

Corner of your eye
sends a shiver up your spine
spider on the wall

***

Why won't it compile
damn this program, damn it all
it is not my fault

***

Cheap drinks, free nachos
Thursday happy hour calls
Pedros here we come

***

Golden Arches shine
Have you had your break today?
A cow is slaughtered

***

the sliding black disk
like dark moon eclipsing sun
ten points botswana

***

small tan cubicle
sparse fluorescent shanty town
never see the sun

***

monday tuesday crap
wednesday thursday friday crap
sunshine then monday

***

Warm banana nut muffin
Extra large latte
Crack of dawn necessities

***

Gail force winds, flying insects.
After lunch pond walk
Are we hampsters in a wheel?

***

Absolutely not
do you intend to offend?
you tread on thin ice....

***

Feeling free to try,
You invite the judges wrath
Oh silly poet.

***

Pizza by the pond
Convenience store and pod squad
I regret absence

***

Stress ball world and brain
Transformation map
Mouse runs wild on it

***

These haiku are bad
If you don't delete my name
You're dead Nature said

[home]
[judges choice]

-------------------------------------------------------
important note: these poems were submitted anonymously by their authors.  
no division of smooth dave enterprises nor any employee of said 
organization can be held responsible or accountable for their content.
-------------------------------------------------------