Maybe I didn't hold you all those lonely, lonely times.
And I guess I never told you, I'm so happy that you're mine.
If I made you feel second best, I'm so sorry, I was blind.
You were always on my mind.
You were always on my mind.
Fenus-- Always On My Mind
~~Mimi~~
She looked at herself in the mirror, and saw an angel looking back. Full, tempting lips painted a shocking crimson in a backdrop of porcelain smooth skin.
Long lashes sweeping down to veil honey-gold eyes, a startling gaze that held the certain jaded look all models perfected over time. And framing it all, masses of golden-brown hair teased into a glamorous up-do, leaving the pale skin of her neck seductively bare.
But it was the eyes that demanded her attention. Cold and devoid of any laughter, like jeweled ice. Eyes that had shed too many tears, and spoke volumes about unimaginable loss.
She paused from combing tendrils of her hair and lifted a delicate eyebrow at her mirror image. "Since when have you become so introspective?" she asked
herself mockingly.
Shrugging lightly, she set the comb down and picked up the crystalline glass on top of the dresser. Pinot Noir, 1903, and an unremembered gift from one of her modeling shoots.
'Only the best,' she thought dryly, holding up the wineglass and watching the golden light hit the crystal and fracture into tiny, dancing sparks. Her lips curved up in an ironic smile as she toasted herself and took a delicate sip, swishing the warm liquid around in her mouth and enjoying its dry, musky taste.
"Oh, damn," she cursed as she caught a glance of smudged lipstick in the ornate mirror. Krista, her makeup expert of the day, was going to have an apoplectic fit at her ruined handiwork. She could almost picture the woman's screaming hysterics and laughed a little at the image.
Well, she could fix it soon enough. She knew she had a similar shade of lipstick hidden somewhere in her purse.
Mimi sighed and rummaged around in her purse, swearing she was going to clean it out someday. According to Mike, she could hide a baby elephant in it, and that only in the side pocket.
A panicked glance at the clock told her she had only five minutes before the arrival of the photographer so she started unceremoniously dumping the contents of her purse onto the dresser.
A scrap piece of paper fell out, fluttering onto the ground like a broken butterfly. With a vague sense of curiosity, Mimi leaned down and picked it up. Its edges were curled and yellowing from age, and there were smudges from fingerprints on the glossy back. As if she had picked it up many times before.
'Must be one of my old modeling photos,' she thought absently as she turned it around.
And then all her breath left her body in a strangled gasp as her knees gave way, and she sank into her chair, fingers white-knuckled as they gripped the edge of the dresser for support.
And no matter what, she couldn't tear her gaze away from the photo. Her eyes traced his every feature hungrily, everything about him intimately familiar even after ten years.
The disheveled brown hair falling rakishly into his eyes, the wide grin on his face as he smiled for the camera. All of it was so achingly familiar, down to the beautiful chocolate-brown eyes that had always had a special way of warming her heart and making her knees weak with longing.
Mimi squeezed her eyes shut, feeling the warmth of tears tracing a path down her face as all the memories came back in one aching rush. She had been so happy back then.
Everything had seemed so beautiful, so perfect, their love for each other so strong that it had been almost painful. And even after everything that had happened with Matt and their parents, even after the whole world had seemed to be sinking into madness around them, he had been the only bright spot, the only thing she needed to live for.
'Were we so young back then?' she wondered hopelessly. 'So innocent, thinking our love could overcome anything and everything?' And just then, she swore she could hear his voice in her mind, the day she had left him forever.
His beautiful voice, choked with tears and desperate pain, pleading with her to stay, to give their love the chance it deserved.
"Mimi, in 10 years, I plan on looking back with you. Living a life without you, is worse than anything I can imagine"
There was a sharp pain in her hands, and she realized she had been unconsciously digging her nails into her palms. With an almost eerie fascination, she held up one slender, red-nailed hand to the light, watching a drop of blood blossom from her skin like some crimson flower.
"Well, we were wrong," she whispered, saying the words out loud as if to brand them into her mind. "Damn, wrong, because look at me now. I don't even know where you are, if you've fallen in love and forgotten me, burned away our memories together so they're only cold ashes. But Tai," she choked out, all her composure suddenly deserting her as her lips uttered the beautiful sound of his name for the first time in so many years, "I've never forgotten you. Never. And God help me, I still love you."
"Hey sweetheart," the masculine voice at her door jerked her roughly out of her past with aching suddenness.
'Damn,' she thought, panicked. It was her fiancée, Mike, which meant that the photographer must have arrived. "Hold on," she called out.
She quickly grabbed a tissue and tried to dab the tears and smeared makeup from her face, annoyed that her hands were trembling.
"The shoot's all set up," Mike said loudly. He opened the door and Mimi struggled to put on a calm expression.
"How do I look?" she asked coyly, tilting her head up to look at him.
Mike was giving her an openly admiring look, grinning widely. "Beautiful, as always. But you know that already."
"I know," she replied easily, "but I just like to hear you say it."
"You know I'll say anything you want," her fiancée said in a husky voice, coming over to where she was sitting and gently brushing a tendril of hair away from her neck. Then his stormy grey eyes met hers in the mirror and he frowned. "Mimi, honey, is something wrong?" he asked, voice shaded with concern.
"No, of course not," she replied quickly, reaching up and taking his hand in her own. "What makes you say that?"
He shook his head, the light picking out golden highlights in his dirty blonde hair. "Oh, nothing. You just look, I don't knowsad?"
'Get a hold of yourself,' Mimi commanded herself harshly. Tai was the past, this was now. They were two completely different people who had shared some childhood love. Nothing more.
"I'm just a little tired," she said, summoning up a cheerful smile. "I mean, we've been to, what? Four photo shoots in that many days, not to mention the fact that right now I look like some heroine from a bad romance novel. I swear, if Krista even thinks of coming near me with so much as an eyelash curler, I'll throw my glass at her."
Mike laughed openly. "A glass, Mimi? That's all? You never were good at the spoiled model tantrum." He squeezed her hand, his smile widening. "But I completely understand. You're tired, you're stressed. I am too. It's not easy being the manager for the most beautiful woman in the world, y'know."
Mimi rolled her eyes at him, his words provoking a delighted giggle from her. "Oh, so now it's blatant flattery, hmm? But seriously, sweetheart, if you would just let some other company lackey finalize the layout instead of you doing every single one of mine, you would have so much more time. That's what you pay them for, remember?"
"Yeah, right," he answered, giving her an exaggeratedly haughty look. "And let any of them fall even more in love with you? I don't think so!"
"Oh, just what I need," she said wryly. "More lunatic stalkers."
He smiled, caressing the back of her neck so lightly it made her shiver. "Let them try," he murmured. "The lady's already said 'yes.' " He held up his left hand, the light winking off the blazingly white diamond ring on his fourth finger.
"Exactly," she replied, returning his smile. "And this lady's going to get seriously yelled at if she doesn't go to her modeling shoot now."
"Oh, right," Mike said, grinning. "Completely forgot. But one more thing, Mimi."
"Yes?"
"Guess where I booked your next modeling shoot?" His voice was gleeful as he gave her a challenging look.
She couldn't help smiling. "My head hurts, sweetie. Just tell me."
"Japan!" he crowed enthusiastically, grin widening.
"Japan?" she echoed, breaking out into excited laughter. "Oh my God, Mike. You're the best. I haven't been there in ages. Wait until I tell my parents!"
"Anyone alive in here?" the angry voice of the photographer boomed down the hallway and the couple gave each other guilty looks.
"Oops, we'd better get going before Brendan has an aneurysm," Mike said.
They exited the room, laughing, and Mimi gently closed the door behind her. Inside, a stray breeze whispered into the room, caressing the old photo on the dresser with invisible fingers.
Slivers of sunlight from the window gently glinted on the faded colors, illuminating it in a brief flash to a dusky gold so that it became something more beautiful and radiant.
It was a picture of a boy, a boy on the cusp of manhood, who had found something so precious in life that sacrifice meant nothing. A boy madly in love, the dark brown eyes shining with a joy that knew no limits, that still believed in such a thing as true love and happily ever after.
A light breeze stroked the curtains, and the sunlight stole away like a repentant child. Already, the picture was fading.
~~Tai~~
He rubbed his tired eyes and barely suppressed a huge yawn. With an annoyed sigh, he glanced at his watch, more out of having nothing to do than because he really didn't know the time.
Still forty-nine minutes after midnight; she definitely had crossed the line between fashionably late and just damn obnoxious late.
Tai exhaled deeply, absently swirling the milky contents of his glass. 'Sex on the Beach,' the drink was called.
He had only ordered it for the liberal dose of caffeine, and because the name amused him for some reason. Sure, he had work bright and early the next morning and he probably was gonna pay like hell for the alcohol and the caffeine combined. But he didn't really care.
Chemicals in his bloodstream had never stopped him from being the best damn photographer in the world.
"Cheer up, Kamiya," he whispered to himself. He should be happy, celebrating or something. Just this morning, he had gotten a phone call from Joe, telling him that he was getting married.
A shock, definitely. But what had surprised him the most had been the fact that Joe had bothered to call him. After all, all of them had lost touch so many years ago, a little after Matt had taken his own life. After Mimi had moved to America.
Even now, he wasn't sure how to feel about hearing from one of his old friends again. It was almost exquisitely painful, really, kind of like a sore tooth. You couldn't stop probing the wound, even though it brought on more pain.
In the smoky atmosphere of the bar, Tai almost wished for those long ago days again. When everything had seemed so innocent, when "friends forever" really
meant forever.
A self-deprecating smile tugged at the corners of his lips. Life certainly had a way of turning out unexpectedly.
Ten years ago, he had thought he had all his plans laid out for him on a golden platter. Marry Mimi Tachikawa, have the white picket fence, 2.5 kids, the whole deal.
"Getting drunk without me, Tai?" a sweet, feminine voice whispered in his ear. "Not so gentlemanly after all."
Tai's head snapped up, eyes wide with surprise. He had been so lost in his haunted thoughts that he hadn't heard his girlfriend approach. "Hey, Cathy," he managed, summoning up a feeble grin.
His girlfriend stood watching him, hands on hips in an unconsciously flirtatious pose. She was stunning, in a model's way, with waves of auburn hair framing a heart-shaped, girlish face. Her green eyes sparkled mischievously.
"Sorry I'm late, sweetheart. Karla wouldn't let me leave until she told me the news."
"News?" Tai asked curiously, pulling out a chair for her. He was about to signal the bartender to get a drink for Cathy but she waved it away.
"No thanks, love. I'm way too excited." She smiled happily and took his hands in her own slender ones. "Guess what, Tai? Xyla modeling agency's hired me as their spokesperson." She shook her head, bemused. "Their spokesperson, dammit! Can you believe that? I just about fainted from the shock!"
Tai laughed, her joy infectious. "Congratulations, Cathy. That's wonderful. There's no one better for the job."
"I'd like to think so," she replied, her tone suddenly serious. "But you know what that means, don't you Tai? I have to move to Los Angeles."
"I know" he began, but she cut him off.
He had never seen his girlfriend this serious, and it unnerved him. She nervously tucked a strand of hair behind her ear.
"Tai, I know it's asking for a lot. But I want you to move to America with me. Just think about it. You wouldn't have to work for that son of a bitch Oogami anymore. Any company in LA would snatch you up in a heartbeat. And then we could be together." And then she leaned in closer, green eyes intense.
"I know when we started dating, we promised we would keep it from getting serious. Just dating for fun, and all that. But now, I realized something. I love you, Tai. I'm truly in love with you, and II just can't lose you."
She trailed off, her hands trembling as they gripped his tightly. And for that one moment, Tai felt like he was that eighteen year old boy again, and Cathy wasn't
Cathy, but Mimi.
But he had been the one doing the begging. Pouring out his heart to his soul mate, believing naively that maybe if he told her how much he loved her enough times, she would change her mind.
"II can't," he muttered through lips gone numb, "I'm sorry, Cathy. I just can't," he repeated lamely, heart clenching painfully inside him as his girlfriend stared at him in shock.
"But don't you love me?" she implored, tears sliding down her face. Tai willed himself to say something comforting, something that would mend the rift between them, but he found his lips wouldn't move.
Cathy stared at him for a moment, before abruptly jerking her hands out of his grasp and stumbling backwards.
"You cold son of a bitch," she said in a low, despairing voice. "You don't love me, do you? All this time I should have known better. I'm sorry I ever met you, Tai Kamiya. I should have realized you don't have a heart." She grabbed her purse and stumbled out blindly, not bothering to wipe away her tears.
Tai found he could only watch her leave, helpless to stop her, to call out the words that would bring her back. Because saying 'I love you' would only be a hateful lie.
Because ever since Mimi had left him, he had pushed love away, a defense mechanism to spare him from any more emotional trauma.
A bitter expression crossed his handsome features as he let the waters of the past drown him again.
'God, Mimi, I was willing to lay everything on the line for you, everything. My family, my friends, hell, even my own life. All to hear you say you loved me, that you would give us a chance. But it wasn't enough, was it?"
He closed his eyes, resting his head wearily on his hand and letting the bittersweet past burn his tortured mind. That one day, so beautiful and so bittersweet. When he and Mimi had both grown up so much, and left childhood behind.
Images danced across his closed eyelids. Soft, dew-laden grass underneath his trembling hands. The tender caress of her breath against his neck. The touch of her skin like tendrils of fire as his fingers traced her body. The salty taste of his own tears, mingled with hers, as he entrusted his heart to the woman he loved more than anything.
And then Cathy's words echoing in his mind like physical blows. "I'm sorry I ever met you, Tai Kamiya. I should have realized you don't have a heart."
"I'm sorry, Cathy," Tai whispered, alone again in the present. "But my heart was never mine to give."
"Where the hell is Tai?" fumed Patrick, Tai's personal assistant, as he paced around the small room. "He was supposed to be here an hour ago!"
"Calm down honey." smiled Nancy, a rather large woman, that was the secretary for the Zochi modeling firm.
She passed her small, thick fingers through her enormous head of dyed red hair, and began primping it, so it stayed in it's 'fluffy' looking style. Her fake red nails tapped on her desk, as she then took out a magazine, and began rifling through articles.
"This is a disaster!" Patrick bellowed throwing his hands in the air. Beads of sweat began forming over his brow, and he carelessly wiped them away, drying his bald head, with his long sleeve black shirt.
"Hello everybody!" Tai said chipperly, as he walked into the studio with a cup of coffee in hand.
"Where the hell have you been?" Patrick snapped, as he walked over to Tai pointing his finger threateningly.
"I was getting coffee." he said simply, as he walked over to Nancy. "And how is my favorite secretary doing?" he said as he kissed her cheek.
"A lot better now that you're here." she said returning his peck. "Is it just me, or are you getting more handsome every day?" she said smiling wide.
Tai blushed, as he passed his hand nervously through his tangled hair. Over the years, his hair had stayed the same. It had only gotten a little shorter. Now it was only 2 inches off his head, but was still a giant mop."I don't think so." he muttered.
Nancy laughed. "Go figure. A modest model. And I thought I saw everything!" she said through chuckles. Tai continued to turn even redder, and Patrick was fuming.
"You are late! We have models waiting!" he said as he balled his fists. His stern face was as red as Tai's, but he wasn't embarrassed. He was pissed.
"Don't worry." said Tai lightening up. "Man. They're probably discussing wether they should eat only two peas instead of three."
Nancy gasped. "Two whole peas. My, they certainly aren't watching themselves any more." she said in a concerned voice, but soon after broke out into a fit of giggles with Tai.
"Don't you just love this woman?" Tai said hugging her tightly. Patrick didn't answer him. He just leered evilly. "Oh, I forgot. You don't like women anymore do you?" he said sweetly. He loved getting Patrick mad. It was one of his favorite pastime!
"Stop making fun of me Kamiya!" Patrick hissed. "I swear, make fun of me one more time, I'll report you to Mr. Oogami!"
"Idle threats gay man." Tai said, as he threw down his bag, and grabbed the portfolio. "The pictures for editing." he smirked, as he threw it at him.
"Thank you." he said maliciously, as he stomped away.
Tai sighed again. "Out of all the gay assistants in Japan, I get the one with the biggest stick shoved up his... hello Mr. Oogami." he quickly covered, as he placed a large smile on his face.
"Kamiya!" he shouted fiercely. "My office! Right now!"
"Yes Mr. Oogami." Tai sighed, as he placed his coffee cup on top of the large stack of beauty magazines Nancy bought.
She smiled at him cautiously, as she thumbed through the latest issue of Vogue with one of her bright red nails.
"Ms. Craig, shouldn't you be doing something?" Mr. Oogami asked, as he turned to his secretary.
"Yes sir!" she said happily, as she shut the thick book, and began to finish up the reports that were on her desk.
As he was walking away, he noticed the pretty model on the cover. "Nancy, who is that girl?" he asked, as he picked it up, and began examining the cover.
"Well, from what I've heard, her name is Candy. She's new in the industry, but she's picking up jobs like they're flowers!"
"Call up her agent." Mr. Oogami said, as he placed the magazine in its original position. "Whoever photographed her, did a poor job. Hell, Kamiya could have done better!"
"Tai's the best sir." she hissed. Her chubby fingers were balled together tightly.
"I bet he is." he said rolling his eyes, and walking away from her. He stepped into his office, slamming the door shut.
Nancy sighed. 'Tai's in for it now.' she thought sadly, as she typed up a memo to Candy's agent.
"What's up sir?" Tai said immaturely, as he squirmed in his seat. He hated being called into this office. Every time he was here, he would always get in trouble.
"Our profits! That's what!" he said turning to him, smiling his head off. To Tai, his smiles were just as evil as he snarls, but at least he wasn't in trouble.
"What do you mean sir?" he asked blankly.
"Kamiya!" he said happily, as he sat on the edge of his desk. "Ever since we invested in you, our companies profits have raised 42 percent! You're a magnet for the crowds! They love you!"
"Thank you sir." Tai replied, feeling very proud of himself.
"And when you modeled for us, the crowds ate it up with a spoon! Kamiya, Zochi owes you big time. You made this company what it is today! The top leading modeling agency in Asia!"
"But sir." Tai said.
"No but's Kamiya!" he growled. "Did you read this week's edition of Forbes?"
"No, I was about too though." he said, showing him the stack of magazines he had stuffed into his briefcase.
"Page 70 to 75." he said throwing him the book. "It's all about you."
Tai quickly flipped to page 70, and read the first line. His eyes popped out of his head, as he continued. "It say here, I'm the highest paid photographer in all the world." he said continuing. "And that, anybody whose anybody wants me to take their picture!"
"It's all true. Companies have been ringing off the hook for you. Elle. In Style. Vogue even. And they have their own team of photographers!" Mr. Oogami said cheerfully. "You've been offered 25 thousand a roll."
"25 thousand..." Tai stated blankly.
"Yes my boy! For 24 iity-bitty pictures, you get 25 thousand dollars."
"I don't believe this." he said letting his head flop over the back of the chair. He stared at the ceiling, for a while, not know wether to shout out happily or, well, shout out even happier.
"This is a great day!" Mr. Oogami said, as he practically picked up the shocked Tai, and slapped him on the back. "And you deserve it! Now, get out of here, and make me proud!" he said, as he open the door, and threw him and his belongings out.
"What happened Tai?" Nancy asked curiously, as she twisted her frizzy red hair around one of her fingers.
"You wouldn't believe it, even if I told you." he said forcing a smile, as he dropped his bag, and grabbed his coffee. "But if anyone asks, I'm busy."
"What? Dentist appointment? Check up at the doctor's? Family emergency?" she said listing off the possible lies.
"How about, ready to self combust?" he said blowing her a kiss, and grabbing a camera that was hanging on a long pegged row.
"Gucci shoot!" she yelled, as Tai walked into a room, winking at her.
"What would I do without you Nancy?" he joked, as he opened the door, and stepped in.
"Probably not half as bad as I'd do without you." she whispered, as she sighed heavily, and continued to type.
"So Tai?" a model wearing a long black dress asked. "What are you doing tonight?"
"Nothing Clair. Why do you ask?" he said snapping another picture. He let the camera on the tripod, and walked over to her. A smile lingering o his handsome face.
"Well, a bunch of my friends and I were throwing a party, and wanted to know if you could come." she gazed up at him with her long eyelashes, and batted them a few times. "It would be no fun without you." she added playfully, as she touched his shoulder.
"Is it like your last party where I was the only guy, surrounded by drop dead gorgeous women?" he smiled, as he brushed aside a piece of her hair, and positioned her arm and inch higher.
"No. But I can arrange it so it's that way if you want." she said smirking.
"Sorry. I'd love to go, but I already have other plans." Tai said shrugging his shoulders, with a happy-go-lucky smile on his face.
"So, who the lucky girl?" Clair asked disappointed as she pouted.
"Now, keep that beautiful face of yours smiling!" he said smirking. "And that's none of your busyness."
"Since when?" she said smiling again. "And I want to know who the name of the girl that's taking you away from me!"
"Not telling." he said snapping a photo of her looking at him disapprovingly.
"I'll make you tell me!" she said running over to him, almost tripping on her long gown.
Tai caught her in his arms, before she hit the ground. Her arms flew up, wrapping around his neck.
"Thanks." she said smiling slightly embarrassed.
"It's okay. I master in Catching Clumsy Models 101." Tai joked as Clair slapped his arm lightly.
"You know, a year ago you wouldn't be talking to me that way!" she said knowingly, as he let her go.
"A year ago, we wouldn't exactly be speaking if I caught you like that, now would we?" he said as he placed his precious camera in its case.
"Ah. The good old days." she said as she walking to him from the back. "Don't you miss them?"
"You mean, do I miss us?" Tai corrected her.
"Yeah." she said spinning around, and sitting on the desk she was modeling on.
"To tell you the truth, I do miss you sometimes, late at night when I'm all alone. You always seemed to know just what to say to me, to make me feel better. Now, nothing." Tai admitted truthfully, as he placed the flash back in its rightful case.
"We could be like that again you know." she said sitting up, and walking over to him seductively. "We can go right back to being happy." she approached him, and wrapped her arm around his shoulders. "I can make you happy again. Just give me one night."
She leaned up, to kiss his lips, but Tai pulled away. "Sorry Clair." he said backing away from her. "I can't do that again. I'm sorry, but we can only be friends."
"Oh well." she sighed. "But you remember Tai Kamiya. You ever need anybody, you come to me. I'll be waiting." she said, winking at him, the way he used to wink at her, and walked out the door. An endless black dress followed her out.
As soon as she was out of an earshot, he dropped down on the desk, wiping his forehead. "God that was close." he said, as there was a knock on the frame. "Yeah. The doors wide open."
"Tai dear," Nancy said. "I have to go home, and freshen up before tonight, so I'll be back."
"But I like what you're wearing!" he moped, as his long brown hair fell carelessly on his attractive face.
"Don't you look at me like that!" she said averting her eyes.
"Please." Tai said getting up and walking over to her, still pouting. "Pretty please, just come with me like this!"
"Stop it Tai!" Nancy said swatting at his arm weakly. "I look horrible!"
"You look great!" he said spinning her around. "I fact, I think I'm going to put you on the cover of every magazine and newspaper in the world!"
"Shut up!" she said laughing. "But you win. I'll go get my coat."
"I never lose do I?" she said smiling triumphantly.
"That's only because you know my one weakness!" she said smiling back at him.
"And what would that be?" he said cutely, as they walked over to her desk.
"You, silly." she said clutching his arm.
"I can't believe you did that!" Nancy said clutching at her side, laughing hardly.
"What! Was it my fault I had no clue escargot were snails?"
"I can't believe you thought they were still alive. You almost gave the waiter a heart attack when you screamed!"
"Is it my fault I'm also petrified of anything that crawls?" he muttered shuddering.
"You're so much fun to be around Tai." she said looking at him, as he guided her up the stairs to her house.
"Only when I'm with people I like." he said looking down at her.
"Flatterer." she smiled, as she pulled out her house key, and placed it in the keyhole. Her door clicked open, and she walked in.
"What!" Tai said in a hurt voice. "No goodnight kiss?"
"Goodbye Tai." she said kissing his cheek.
"Bye Nancy." he said happily, as he walked away, off to his apartment for the night.
The air had suddenly gone freezing cold, and Tai began to shiver. He pulled his coat tighter on his shaking body, and shuddered slightly, at the sudden plunge in temperature.
And to his luck, he had a long way to finally hit home. He sighed, letting the ice laced air carry his warn breath away.
'What a beautiful night.' he thought, as he looked at his watch. 'It's only 10 o'clock. 'Too early to go home.' he thought, as he racked his brain for things to do.
'Clair's party.' he decided, as he turned the corner, and glanced up at the large Hotel.
Her penthouse had the lights blazing, and he could hear the music from where he was standing. He smiled, happy that Clair hadn't lost her party spirits.
The walk over to her place, seemed only like seconds, and the elevator ride to the top floor or the 47 story building was nothing.
He approached the door, and knocked loudly, hoping someone heard him, so he just didn't stand outside the whole night like a huge fool.
His prayers were answered, as Clair opened the door, and smiled happily.
"Well, what brings you to the neighborhood stranger?" she joked, as she let the door swing open, revealing the numerous people that were inside, dancing and having a great time.
"My date got tired, and I took her home." Tai said as he threw his jacket over the pile on the sturdy coat rack.
"Nancy." she guessed, as she handed him an oddly shaped glass, filled to the brim with champagne.
"How'd you know?" he asked seriously, as he took a sip.
"You care about her don't you."
"I consider her part of my family." he said quickly finishing off the cup, and placing it back on the table, covered with untouched food. "A model party." he said grabbing a handful of carrots. "This isn't food Clair. It's rabbit chow."
"Well we rabbits enjoy it." she said pulling him to the dance floor.
"Oh no!" Tai said laughing. "I know the way you dance! My feet still haven't recovered!"
"Shut up!" she smiled, as she snapped her fingers. Like magic, the fast beat music turned into a sappy romance song. The people around them instantly gathered in pairs, and began dancing.
"Still got everything wrapped around your finger?" he said chuckling, as he looked into her pale brown eyes. Her gorgeous face was brushed lightly with sparkles, and her hair shimmered over her slender shoulders.
"Not everything." she said gazing into his massive brown eyes. She always felt at ease with him. She could act like herself. And that's why she cared about him the way she did. Never in a million years would she ever find another man like him.
Tai was one of a kind, and Clair knew that any girl foolish enough to give him up, needed some type of psychological help. Namely her.
"You know Tai, breaking up with you, was the worst mistake of my life." she said placing her head over his heart. She adored listening to his strong beat. It always reassured her, that someone out there loved her.
"I know." he whispered. "Letting you leave was a big mistake on my part too." he said placing his head onto of her head, inhaling the sweet smell of her hair.
"Then why can't we get back together?" she asked him, not moving her head.
"You know why." he sighed.
"I guess I'm still no competition." she said sadly.
"Don't say that Clair." Tai said tilting her head up to meet his once again. "You are a very beautiful, and sexy woman. You could have absolutely any guy you want."
"But I want to be with you." she whispered. "Tai..."
"Clair. We're friends." he said. "We can only be friends."
"I know." she moaned. "I just wish I had met you earlier. Maybe we would still be together."
"Clair, I can guarantee, that if I had met you 10 years ago, I would not have let you out of my arms." Tai said smiling.
"God how can you still do this to me?" she said exasperated.
"Do what?" he questioned.
"Still make me feel as if I'm to only one that matters in the world." she said smirking.
"Well you are, and you deserve to be treated that way." he said lightly kissing her forehead. "Now. I think you've let this song play long enough. Maybe something a little faster?"
"Done." she smiled. She looked over at the DJ, who instantly changed the song.
"Still got it!" she said swaying her body to the music.
"You never lost it." Tai shouted at her over the blaring music. He accidentally bumped into a man in a grey suit, and the man turned to face him.
Tai stopped moving. He almost froze. The man looked almost identical to Matt.
"Sorry." he apologized quickly.
"No problem!" the man said happily, as he returned to his conversation. Tai recognized a few of the people the man was talking to. One included Mr. Oogami, who looked particularly thrilled.
'I'm gonna hear about this tomorrow.' he thought, as he yawned subconsciously.
He turned his attention back to the girl he was dancing with. A thick layer of purple smoke irrupted from the fog machine Clair had hidden under a table.
Tai remembered the time she bought it. To give her parties a more, sophisticated look. Like the ones they always attended when they were in Paris or Rome.
She soon started to pass out drinks, and herself and Tai ended up laughing over old times at her indoor bar.
"How about the time we got trapped in that Prince's room in Africa? That was probably the most fun I've ever had with you!" Clair laughed, as she took an elegant sip of her champagne.
"No way! It was when we were supposed to be in France, and the pilot of the Zochi jet though we were supposed to be in Australia. Then we find out the guy is deaf!" Tai laughed loudly. "Remember the custom's guy there? G'day mates! Glad you flew here, no we have to strip search your friend!"
"Don't remind me." Clair shuddered. "And after all that, he just wanted an autograph."
"But it was funny." Tai insisted.
"Coming from the guy who had to just watch!" she challenged, as she lightly hit his shoulder.
"And watch I did." he grinned, as he took her hand in his. "We always had fun together. Always."
"You can say that again." she whispered under the chaotic music. Lights had began swirling around the room, as the foggy mist pulled Tai deeper and deeper into the carefreeness of Clair's world.
He was trapped in a purple haze of nonstop exhilaration and insanity. People everywhere were drinking, partying, and pure, uncut fun.
Clair seductively crawled over onto Tai's lap, and rang her arms around his neck, pulling his face close into hers.
Tai gazed at her lips. The yearning to kiss them again passed over his whole body, crippling his mind beyond comprehension. Not being able to resist it much longer, he leaned over and kissed her lightly.
The warmth of her embrace brought back memories, Tai though he had suppressed. He lightly passed his hands through her soft hair, pulling her body closer to his.
Without warning, Clair pulled away, staring dreamily into his eyes. She took her hand, and shakingly stroked his cheek. She bit down on her bottom lip to keep it from quivering so much, because she was sure she would melt any second now.
"Why?" she breathed.
"Because I wanted to." he replied, kissing her again. "Because I want to."
The next morning, Tai got up early. Well, for him it was way too early, considering he barely got any sleep the night before.
He glanced at Clair's thin frame through the silk sheets of her king size bed, and smiled. Before he left, he wrapped his arms around her slender waist, and lightly pulled her sleeping form into his arms.
He cradled her for as long as he could stand. He wanted to just kiss her so badly, but he contained himself, and walked out the door.
He wrote a small, almost legible note on her kitchen table, and placed it in plain view. She was sure to see it.
But he had to go. Nancy had told him that Oogami had a project for him. And if Mr. Oogami had a project for him, it usually meant 78 hours of straight work, and enough coffee to kill a horse.
Mourning smiles like the face of a new born child.
Innocent. Unknowing. Winter's end.
Promises of a long lost friend.
Speaks to me of comfort.
But I fear.
I have nothing to give.
Sarah McLachlan-- Fear
~~Mimi~~
Mimi shifted uncomfortably in her seat. She hated sitting still, but that was one of the qualifications for being a model. Sit still, and smile. Job done. Then you get payed. But she didn't really mind this time.
She was finally back in her hometown! She was back in Japan after ten long years!
But for once she wished she met a photographer that didn't go, "Be naturel" and then after everything, scrap all the photo's because they looked queer.
But right now, she was praying that this god-awful photo shoot would end. As a change of pace, she had a girl photographer, and she think she was the bosses daughter or something. She barely knew how to take a picture, let alone one made for a magazine!
"Mimi! Mimi!" Anya, one of her good friends cried. Like Mimi, she was a freelance model. Over the past few months, they had grown really close, and Mimi considered her part of her family. Practically a surrogate sister.
They told each other almost everything. Anya was so open, and unafraid to express what she was really feeling. And Mimi envied her for that.
"Yeah!" she called, turning around. She was developing a cramp in her neck, and just had to move. "What's up?"
"Oh my God! Did you hear the news!? It's like, colossal huge!" she panted, as she flipped a piece of her hair in back of the hat she was wearing.
"No." Mimi chuckled softly. "What is it?"
"Oh my God, Oh my God, Oh my God!" she panicked. "I have no clue how to say this! It's so big!"
"Just say it!" Mimi rambled, getting quite excited herself.
"Zochi modeling agency wants me to be on their next cover! Zochi! Can you believe it?!" she yelled, almost passing out.
"Oh! I'm so happy for you!" she cried, flinging her arms around her neck. For most people, getting asked by Zochi is a great honor. But to Anya, it was her dream. Ever since she picked up Zochi's magazine, she vied to get asked.
And now her dream was a reality but Mimi always knew she's get it. She had this aura surrounding her, that enabled her to get whatever she wanted.
Of course. She never used this for personal gain. She was just very persuading. Hell, she could get Mimi's stubborn fiancee to roll over and do back flips if she wanted!
"But that's not all the news!" she said hyperly, as tried to catch her breath. "You're coming with me!"
"What?" Mimi muttered incoherently.
"Mike called me, and said that your Japan photo shoot, is taking place at none other than Zochi Modeling Agency. This is so unreal!"
"You're telling me!" she gasped. "This is incredible!"
"And we're on the same cover as Clair Butler. You know, their model. The one that's in every edition! She's my idol Mimi!" Anya gasped. "She has all this grace, and the hottest boyfriend I've ever seen! He's a model himself you know! Totally gorgeous!"
"Seems to me that you idolize what she has." Mimi joked, as she brushed a stray piece of hair away from her eyes. For some reason, her palm ached.
She subconsciously lifted her hand, turning it over slowly. A drop of scarlet blood dripped to the floor, dirtying the sterilized whiteness of the ground.
"Shit!" she curse, as she quickly grabbed a towel and wrapped it around her fist.
"What happened? How did you hurt yourself?" Anya asked panicking. She hated the sight of blood, and had a tendency to faint at the sight.
"I don't know..." I muttered baffled. It truly was odd, and I had no clue how the slight wounds reopened.
"I'll get the nurse or something." Anya promised, as she turned around, and dashed off, as fast as her thin legs could take her.
Mimi gazed down, transfixed by her palm. The four, identical red lines had somehow began to bleed again.
But this time, she hadn't been digging her nails into it. She was just talking about Clair Butler's boyfriend.
Nothing that would concern her in the least.
Driven by the strange desire.
I want, what I need.
Laughing as the sex takes hold.
I've, lost all control.
Temptation.
Tea Party -- Temptation
~~Tai~~
"Hey Tai." Nancy smirked.
"What? What I do?" he asked bewildered as he looked around puzzled.
"Rumor has it, that you and Clair are back together."
"Don't believe everything you hear Nancy. You know better than that!"
"Yeah, but a girl can't help hoping! Tai, you and Clair are meant for each other! Everybody sees that but you! And I don't know how you can keep denying it!"
"Listen, don't get me wrong. I do care about Clair. Very much. And my feelings for her are way past those of just friends, but I can't love her. Not fully anyway."
"Tai, is there something you're not telling me here? You know you can trust me right?"
"Oh God Nancy! I know I can trust you! And I do! With all my soul! But this is just something I don't want to discuss with anyone. But believe me. If I ever tell anyone, you'll be the first."
"Damn it Tai!" Nancy cursed, as she stomped her foot down. "Look at you. And I mean really look at yourself. You're a dream darling! Any girl's dream! You're smart, charismatic, funny, and you're a dish! You're the whole package, and yet, your still single."
"But it's not that easy Nancy! I just can't go out and pick anyone off the streets! Out of the blue! I want to settle down with someone, that understands me. That's been through what I've gone through. That sees me for me, and not the dolled up fake they see in pictures."
"And that's why Clair is perfect for you! She gets it all the time! She knows what it's like! And she loves you Tai, she really, really loves you!"
"And that's why I can't be with her! I know I'll end up hurting her! History will repeat itself, and my heart will get ripped out of my chest again. And I can't go through, or put anyone in that type of pain again!"
"And you're a noble heart." Nancy smiled. "Listen to me. Not as your friend, but as someone who knows the pain. I lost Kevin six years ago. I still haven't gotten over it. But the pain lessens gradually, and you move on. And I know it's time that you move on."
"I wish it were that simple." Tai sighed. "If only."
"Yeah." Nancy murmured. "Well, onto work! Shoot in five minutes, and you have a meeting with Oogami and his crew of lackeys at two. And after that, a shoot at four, and you're off for the day. But tomorrow you have a packed day. If you manage to breathe, I'll congratulate you."
"Yeah." he cheered sarcastically, waving his index finger lamely.
"Yeah. I pity you sometimes. But not all the time." she chuckled, as she walked off to go back to do her job.
"Me too." he sighed, as he pulled out the roll of negatives he was keeping in his briefcase.
"Hello. Excuse me." a pretty voice spoke. Tai turned around, almost dropping the roll.
"Why hello." he smiled flirtily. "Are you looking for someone?"
"Actually, I am." she said, riffling through the small backpack she had. After a minute, she emerged with a slip of folded white paper. "My agent said that Zochi wanted me to model for them!"
"Then you must be Candy. Am I right?" Tai guessed, looking at her delicate face.
"That's right!" she smiled joyfully. "And just let me say, that it's been a dream of mine to get my picture taken here!"
"Well then." Tai grinned quirkily. "Lets make your dream come true." he said happily, as he took her gracefully by the hand, and lead her into the photo shoot room.
"I'm Anya. But I go by the name Candy." she said shyly.
"And I'm Tai." he commented, as he shut he door safely.
Somewhere. Somehow.
We've been denied.
Hand in hand.
We walk behind.
Our Lady Peace -- Denied
~~Mimi~~
"Where are we going Mike?" Mimi asked carelessly, as they pushed open the large doors to an ancient looking building. But inside, it was nothing less of amazing.
The floors were a green marble, than shone brightly under the multicolored lights that would flash on and off every few seconds.
The walls were littered with posters and blown-up magazine covers. Another section held a case, filled to the brim with awards and trophies. People were moving around like busy bees, and not once did any of them stop.
"Michael!" Mr. Oogami cheered, as he stepped out from a door, to their left. "So good to see you!"
"Same here Li." he smiled, as he shook his hand. "And this is my lovely fiancee Mimi. She'll be working with the best photographer this building has to offer!"
"And that we have my boy! In fact, he should be joining us soon! Has to get off from a shoot! He's the best! Never stops working!"
Mike laughed. "You don't have to sell him to me! I believe you! And with the work portfolio you've shown me, I can honestly say, I don't want another man doing the job!"
"Yes. Very good. But he never is punctual. He would be late for his own funeral if it weren't for my secretary."
"How drole. Very humourous." Mike said bitterly, as he helped himself to a seat.
Mimi followed obediently, but instead of sitting down, she walked over to where there was a large article clipping. The picture was in black and white, but the headline caught her attention.
Once again she felt faint. Very, very faint. Her head started to swim, and she could feel all her strength leave her.
"No..." she whispered, stepping back. "It can't be..."
"What darling?" Mike said, as he went over to her, examining the photo that was having such an effect on her.
Just then, the door clicked shut, and both of them spun around to meet who had just entered.
"Hi! Sorry I'm late." Tai apologized, as he walked over to his boss. He didn't seem to notice the two people, slightly hidden in the corner.
'No... not Tai. It can't be!' Mimi thought frantically. But one look at the man confirmed her thoughts.
It was him, and he looked even more desirable than before she left him. He had a carefree, almost jovial look on his face as Li Oogami pointed to Mike and herself.
His head turned slightly, as his eyes widened.
"Meet your new model Tai! Mimi Tachikawa." Oogami chuckled, as he slapped him on the back.
It didn't seem to even faze Tai, because of the state of shock he was in. After ten long years of waiting, and fantasizing, she was finally back. She was finally back with him.
"And hello! I'm her fiancee. Michael." the man next to her smiled, extending his hand.
[ part two ] .
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