Don's Spanking Pages

Paddles are a Dom's Best Friend
by Don A. Landhill
Copyright (c) 2000
(based on DIAMONDS ARE A GIRL'S BEST FRIEND by J. Styne)

A crop in the hand may be quite continental,
but paddles are a Dom's best friend
your hand may be grand but when she's tempermental
you'd better lay her flat, upon the bed or mat

Butts grow cold as marks grow old
and a switch will only break and bend
but oblong or pear-shaped,
these tools don't lose their shape--
paddles are a Dom's best friend.

There may come a time when a sub neeeds a soaping
but paddles are a Dom's best friend...
there may come a time when her bratting or mopeing
must be stopped in a trice
then paddle twice, that's my advice

She may cry while paddle's high
But beware when it starts to descend...
It is then that she listens to what she's been missin'
paddles are a Dom's best friend.

We heard of affairs that are strictly platonic,
but paddles are a Dom's best friend...
and I think affairs that you must get with sonnets,
are better bets if little pets get hot brickettes.
time rolls on, her fear is gone
and she won't straighten up once she bends...

But red butt or red eyes
you stand straight from your thighs
Cause paddles are a Dom's best friend!

-D.A.L. May 2000

Not long after I posted this, Bird <bird4444@hotmail.com> re-posted a parody of his on the same song, which he first wrote a couple of years before the above. I liked it very much, and so, with his permission, here is Bird's version...

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