|
Scene 5 The Jail VELMA: Hey. Hey! Hey you! ROXIE: What what what? VELMA: Get out of my chair! ROXIE: Who the hell do you think you are…? MATRON: (warningly) Roxie, Roxie, this here is Velma Kelly. ROXIE: Velma Kelly? THE Velma Kelly? Oh, gosh, I read about you in the papers all the time. Miss Kelly, could I ask you somethin’? VELMA: (suspiciously) What? ROXIE: The Assistant District Attorney, Mr. Harrison, said what I done is a hangin case and he’s prepared to ask maximum penalty. I sure’d appreciate some advice. VELMA: (to ROXIE) Look, I don’t give no advice and I don’t take no advice. You’re a perfect stranger to me and let’s keep it that way. ROXIE: Thanks a lot. VELMA: You’re welcome. MATRON: Roxie, relax. In this town, murder is a form of entertainment. Besides, in forty-seven years, Cook County ain’t never hung a woman yet. So it’s forty-seven to one, they won’t hang you. VELMA: There’s always a first. MATRON: (to ROXIE) Tell me Roxie, what do you figure on using for grounds? What are you gonna tell the Jury? ROXIE: Well I guess… I’ll just tell them the truth. VELMA: Tellin’ the Jury the truth? That’s really stupid. ROXIE: Jesus, Maria and Joseph, what I’m gonna do? VELMA: Baby, you’re talking to the wrong people. MATRON: You see, dearie, it’s this way. Murder is like divorce. The reasons don’t count. It’s the grounds. Temporary insanity… self-defense… ROXIE: (to VELMA) Yeah, what’s your grounds? VELMA: My ground‘s that I didn’t do it. ROXIE: So who did? VELMA: Well, I’m sure I don’t know. I passed out completely. I can’t remember a thing. Only I’m sure I didn’t do it. I’ve the tenderest heart in the world. Haven’t I, Mama? MATRON: You bet your ass you have, Velma. ROXIE: Is being drunk grounds? VELMA: Just ask your lawyer. ROXIE: I ain’t got a lawyer. VELMA: Well, as they say on Park Avenue… you‘re shit out of luck, my dear. (she exits) ROXIE: That’s Velma Kelly, huh? MATRON: Ain’t she somethin’? She wears nothin’ but Black Narcissus Perfume and never makes her own bed. I take care of that for her. ROXIE: You make her bed? MATRON: Well, not exactly. You see, Velma gives me five bucks a week and I give the Hungarian fifty cents and she does it. Hey, Katalin Hunyak, szeretnem ha megismerned Roxie Hart ot. HUNYAK: Not guilty. MATRON: That’s all she ever says. Anyway, you know who’s defending Velma, don’t ya? ROXIE: Who? MATRON: Mr. Billy Flynn! Best criminal lawyer in all Chicago, that’s all. ROXIE: How do you get Billy Flynn? MATRON: First you give me a hundred dollars, then I make a phone call. ROXIE: I see, and how much does he get? MATRON: Five thousand dollars. ROXIE: Five thousand dollars! MATRON: I’ll be happy to make that phone call for you, dearie. ROXIE: Five thousand dollars! Now, where in hell am I gonna get five thousand dollars?! |