mY sToRiEs!!

I went for an evening stroll late that night. My parents told me to get out of the house, that they didn’t want me there anymore. I was in search of something. Someone. But there was nothing. And no one. I passed thousands of familiar faces, yet I did not recognize anyone. I was in search of someone, anyone at all. I endlessly called out “Sam” as I walked blindly through the streets. “Sam, where are you?” I screamed at the top of my lungs until it hurt to scream anymore.

I looked up and realised that I was in a dark alleyway. This, as I remember people telling me, is not a good place for a female teenager to be, alone. But I didn’t care. I just had to get away from everything for awhile, even if it was going against my parent’s wishes. What did they care anyway? If they gave a shit about me they wouldn’t have booted me out of the house like that. Their words were so harsh, their faces so solemn and serious….. Like I had never seen my parents before. They had hurt me horrifically with their strong, harsh and meaningful words they had said to me, but afterwards I knew they wouldn’t even do so much as mutter a “sorry”. Not my parents, they’re too self obsessed.

I have a boyfriend, his name is Sam. I love him so much and miss him something chronic. Am I all alone in this infatuation? Was there anyone else out there who felt even half of these feelings for someone? I think not. My parents tried and tried to keep me from Sam, they told me he was “filth” and “nothing but trouble”. Just like I hurt when he hurts, I also get really offended if anyone teases, mocks or insults him. It’s like we’re attached in someway. What I feel for him is so indescribable. Anyone else would call it love. But that simple, 4 letter word can mean anything you want it to mean. It simply wasn’t strong enough for the feelings I get for him. No words can describe it. Nothing can. 

I kept walking down the dark alleyway in search of something I would simply never find. I heard a noise and, startled, jumped. The noise had terrified me. I could hear footsteps. They were getting closer and closer, my heartbeat was getting faster and faster as my breath was getting deeper and deeper, louder and louder, within each step came a newly born fear. The noises commenced and I started to walk faster. I could feel my heart beating through my thin blue T-shirt, which displayed the symbol “Nike” on it. I don’t even know why I bother with these lame fashion statements; it’s not like I care what other people think about me. Let them think what they like.

Suddenly I was going through a reminiscing period; it was as if my whole life was flashing before my very own eyes. This made me think of my grandfather, my dad’s dad. He had fallen asleep one day last year infront of his beloved 68cm TV and never woke up to see another day. That arrogant bastard. He always butt in on peoples conversations like they didn’t matter, and treated everyone like dirt. But he had a heart of gold. And he was the sweetest person I have ever had the privilege to stumble upon in my pointless existence, some might call it life.

Within seconds I was back to reality again and the footsteps had miraculously ceased. “Phew” I sighed, relieved. What was that all about? I wondered and then realised that I was thinking out aloud. Thank god I was alone!! What a stupid phrase that is. “Thank god”. It’s pathetic. The whole “God” thing is lame. It’s a load of crap. My theory goes that you are led by your parents to believe that such things as the Easter bunny, the tooth fairy and Santa Clause are infact for real. Then all of the childhood comforts are snatched away from you in an instant. It’s like taking candy from a child to do something like that to them. Anyway, it was the same with “God”. He wasn’t real. How could he be? It just isn’t possible. Think logically and maybe you’ll be able to see what I see. I guess we are all led to believe that there is life after death and I would personally love to believe that but I can’t.

My motto is ”Trust nobody” and I’m doing just that and going okay, so I guess I’m on the right track, eh? I heard a creak to my left and all of a sudden there was a man with a balaclava and a knife in his hand. And this isn’t a kitchen knife I was talking about here. It was simply huge and ever so sharp. It was the most disgusting thing I had ever seen. I guess my parents were right about the dangers in dark alleys as a teenage girl. Oh how I wished I had listened to them. Maybe then I wouldn’t have walked down this alleyway tonight in search of a companion. I was looking into my own death and with a quick stab he plunged the knife into my chest. This was the end.