Due to yet another freak coincidence, which this time didn't even concern Akio, the group of Ohtori Academy students who had found themselves in the same World Literature class now gathered around a group of stoves in the Home Economics room. Utena pulled a sheet of chocolate-chip cookies out of one of the ovens and tried to shield her head as the entire class dove for a cookie. They simultaniously jumped back, waving burnt fingers in the air.

"I told you they were going to be hot."

Saionji swore. "Well, I didn't know they were going to be that hot."

They all turned as the door opened and Mikage walked in, reading a book. He looked up when he noticed that they were all staring at him.

"I'm going to be your substitute today."

Wakaba frowned. "What? Another sub?"

Her pink-haired sempai shrugged. "Don't look at me. They tell me there's been a strange shortage of teachers lately and they needed someone to watch the class."

The students turned to glare at Kozue.

"What?!"

Turning back, Utena set down the sheet of cookies and took her oven mitts off. "Why do you get to be our sub, anyway? You haven't even graduated."

"I'm a senior. I'm special."

"Oh."

"At any rate..." Mikage unfolded a piece of paper he had tucked in his breast pocket and handed it to Utena. "We're going on a field trip."

"Another one?!" the entire class said at once.

Utena frowned. "Students older than elementary school don't go on field trips... And we just went on one a couple of weeks ago. This is really strange. And besides, it's last period. We wouldn't get back until tonight."

Mikage shrugged again. "As I said, don't look at me. I only issue the orders." He couldn't believe Ohtori-sama had suckered him into taking care of this class when he could be doing so many more important things, like planning the demise of the Rose Bride.

"Where are we going this time?" Miki asked, wiping floury hands on a towel.

"Tokyo."

* * *
"Usagi-chaaaaan!"

A spray of pebbles clattered against Usagi's window and she bolted upright, gasping.

"Mou! I'm late again!!"

Ten minutes later, the odango-haired schoolgirl stumbled out of her house, ran back to grab her lunchbox from a sleepy-eyed Chibi-Usa, and slid to a stop on the sidewalk between Minako and Makoto. The latter pointed to her wristwatch. "Come on, Usagi-chan! We've only got five minutes until the bell rings!"

"Every day!" Usagi wailed mournfully as they took off towards the school. "I'll have detention again!"

And she did. As usual.

The four other senshi, as well as Chibi-Usa, were waiting for her at the Hikawa Shrine. Usagi slid down onto the steps, panting.

"I got here as fast as I could! Gomen, minna! I had detention again!"

"We know that, Usagi," Rei rolled her eyes. She was dressed in her uniform rather than the usual hakama and keiko-gi she wore at the shrine. Luna was sitting in her lap. She rose when Usagi came and jumped down, padding over to the girl.

"It's such a nice day we thought we should all go down to the park, Usagi-chan," Luna told her.

"You mean I ran all the way from school just so we could go to the park?" Usagi cried, still out of breath. Minako laughed and dragged Usagi to her feet.

"Come on, let's go before it rains or something."

* * *

The bus ride to Tokyo was a considerably long one, and everyone was generally stir-crazy before they arrived at the city park depot. As Utena stepped down from the bus, she turned to glance over her shoulder at Anthy.

"Himemiya, why didn't your nii-san come with us?"

Anthy smiled demurely. "He said he had something important to do."

Meanwhile, all was not well over at the chairman's tower...

"You've been deceiving me the entire time, Akio-san! I know you don't really love me!"

"Kanae, darling, that couldn't be further from the truth."

"You're such a liar!"

"You don't mean that."

"Yes I do!"

Akio sat on one of his white couches, his hands clasped beneath his chin and watching his fiancée across the tea table. Her arms were crossed over her chest sulkily. Her eyes flashed and she unfolded her arms to ball her fists in her skirt.

"You never pay any attention to me! All you ever do is hang around with that stupid pink-haired tomboy and your freaky sister!"

Akio unclasped his hands calmly. "But Anshi is the only family I have. I must spend time with her."

"I'm supposed to be part of your family, too! I swear, the only reason you're marrying me really is for the use of this planetarium."

Akio sat back, looking hurt. Damn. She's getting smarter by the minute. He stood, moving around the table to sit next to her. He took her small hands in his.

"Kanae, I love you. You're the only one."

She snorted, weakening only slightly. "Now you're starting to sound like Touga."

Akio snarled inwardly. She's not buying it. Time for a different approach. He leaned forward, kissing her passionately on the mouth.

For quite a while.

When they finally broke away, Kanae threw her arms around him. "Oh, Akio-san! I'm so sorry! Do you think I'm a terrible person for doubting you?"

"Of course not."

* * *

Usagi and company sat down on the edge of a fountain in the park, opening the lunchboxes they had brought their snacks in. Usagi's eyes shone delightedly as she took a plastic bag of cookies out of her bunny-decorated tin.

"I'm so hungry I could--"

"Usagi-chan!"

From across the park, Naru waved wildly and trotted over.

"Hi Naru-chan! What're you doing here?"

Naru smiled. "It's just such a nice day... Anyway, my mom's taking me out to dinner after she gets finishes work, so I had some time to kill."

"Hey... who're they?"

Usagi and Naru turned to Rei, who was watching a group of kids unload from a school bus across the park.

"They have school uniforms on," Minako observed. "So they must be on a class trip or something."

"This late in the day?" Ami asked, looking up from her book.

No one seemed to hear her. The other five girls, minus Chibi-Usa, were staring at the pair of bright-haired men who had just emerged from the bus.

"Suteki!"

Makoto eyed the green one dreamily. "He looks just like my old sempai when he was in a bad mood..."

Minako grabbed Usagi and Rei by the wrists. "Come on! Let's go meet them!" They took off across the park, with Chibi-Usa on their trail and Ami, Luna, and Artemis trailing behind. The black cat jumped onto Ami's shoulder.

"If only Usagi got this excited about school."

The five middle-schoolers slid to a halt in front of the group from Ohtori, Chibi-Usa shoving through to get a better look.

* * *

Miki blinked at his stopwatch and then glanced at the group of girls in front of them. "Looks like we have a welcoming committee."

"They must have been instantly charmed by my amazing good looks," Touga murmured, tossing his hair over his shoulder.

"Or drawn by your amazing ego," Utena added. Touga smirked at her.

"Hey, it's the Sailor Senshi!"

Rei clamped her hands over Naru's ears just in time, and the Ohtori gang turned to stare at Juri. Usagi gawked for a moment.

"H...how do you know that?! We're in our civilian identities!" she yelled, recovering.

Juri snorted. "You've got to be kidding. Do you actually expect us to believe that there are any other fourteen year old odango-heads running around Tokyo?"

"But... but... we're in our civilian identities!" Usagi repeated lamely.

"Oh, give me a break... None of you even change your hairstyles when you Make Up, and you're senshi costumes are just an elaborate version of your normal uniforms."

Both groups continued to stare at Juri in silence.

She produced a rolled-up magazine from somewhere in her uniform and presented it to them. "I read your manga."

More silence.

Miki was the first one to find his voice. "Juri-san... you read shoujo manga?"

"Yeah. So what? Saionji reads yaoi."

The duelist in question blushed profusely. "I do not!"

Utena snickered. "Saionji, I never knew."

"Rrrrr..."

"I did."

"Touga!"

Meanwhile, Rei had successfully gotten Naru out of the general area by directing her towards the ever-present Umino, who was wandering around the other side of the park. Ami and the cats finally joined them, looking confused.

"Usagi-chan, what's going on?" Luna asked.

"These people know who we are!" Usagi wailed, pointing a finger at Juri.

"This bunch of little girls are supposed to be super heros?" Saionji grumbled and snatched the manga away from Juri, trying to divert the subject from him and his yaoi.

Makoto stepped forward. "Who are you calling little girls?"

"You." He handed the magazine back to its owner.

"Yeah? Well, this little girl could beat you in a fight any day of the week!"

"You think so, do you?"

"I do!"

Luna lept onto Usagi's head. "Minna, don't fight! We don't even know these people, and I don't feel any negative energy from them!"

Saionji, as we all know, was not one to back down from a fight. "What do you say we settle this little argument with a wager?"

"Fine with me!" Makoto retorted.

"I bet you that we can do your job better than you can." Saionji folded his arms.

"Bet me what?"

"Uh..." He faultered. "I don't know, the satisfaction of winning. You're not afraid, are you?"

"Like hell I am! And I bet you we can do better at your job!"

Usagi raised her hand timidly. "Exactly what is it that you guys do, anyway?"

"We're duelists."

Miki nudged the green-haired student in the ribs. "Uh, Sempai..."

"Quiet."

"Hai..."

"So it is agreed. We will stay here in Tokyo and you... six will go back to Ohtori."

Usagi bounced up and down. "Great! We have tomorrow off, so we don't have to worry about school!"

"Here, you'll need a cast list." Makoto and Saionji exchanged pieces of paper.

"I've always wanted to stay in Tokyo," Utena said to Wakaba, who had come to stand beside her.

"Just think of all the great jewelry shops!"

Naru had eventually gotten rid of Umino and wandered back to the group. Usagi grabbed her hands excitedly. "Come with us, Naru-chan! We're going on a trip!"

"But my mother..."

"Oh, she won't mind! Come on!" Usagi and company pushed through the Ohtori students and piled up the steps.

And the bus drove off.

Leaving the gang from Ohtori standing in the middle of the park, alone.

"Great going, Kyouichi," Nanami grumbled. Touga patted her on the head.

"Don't worry, imouto. You can get along without your minions for a few days, anyway."

Utena turned to Juri. "Well, Juri-sempai, you're the only one with any knowledge about these people. Lead away."

Juri took the cast list that Saionji handed to her and thumbed through her manga. "I believe Usagi's house is this way."

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, the cast of Utena gathered in Usagi's bedroom. Utena sat cross-legged on the bed, reading the list of characters. "Why didn't Usagi's parents notice that we aren't... well... Usagi?"

"According to this," Miki, who had been catching up with Juri's collection of manga, explained, "Usagi's parents, as well as a number of her friends, are remarkably succeptable to brainwashing."

"Yeah, but... who would have brainwashed them?"

Utena looked at Anthy, who was sitting quietly beside her, smiling with her eyes shut, and sweatdropped. "Oioi..."

Juri leaned against the desk, crossing her legs casually. "If we're going to take over these girls' job, we'd better get started and assign roles. Obviously, Utena will be Usagi because they're both the heroines. But everyone else has got to find one of the Senshi they can relate to."

"But... some of us are male," Miki objected.

Juri eyed him contemplatively. "You know, you sound an awful lot like that little blue-haired girl with the book."

"What're you talking about? She never even said anything!"

"Don't argue, I know what I'm talking about."

Miki blushed. "I don't know if this is a very good idea..."

* * *

Evening was beginning to fall upon Ohtori Academy as the six Senshi, two cats, and one friend climbed down from the bus and survayed the campus.

"Wow! It's giant!"

Makoto checked her sheet of paper. "It says here which dorms we're in... They're over there." She pointed across the courtyard and the crew wandered in that direction, staring at the flowers and architecture as they went.

* * *

Anthy, dressed in a skin-tight, purple-black catsuit, sat on her knees on the bed, doing Utena's hair. On her head she wore a black headband, complete with large kitty ears, and on her forehead was a glittery gold cresent moon in place of her usual bindi. She took a bobby pin out of her mouth.

"Hold still, Utena-sama."

On the other side of the room, Touga nudged his green-haired friend. "Saionji, you're staring."

Utena fooled with her knee-high red boots. "I don't do dangos."

"If you're going to pass for Sailor Moon, you have to have her signature hairstyle," Anthy told her.

"It's bad enough I have to wear this," Utena said, pulling at the sleeveless, mini-skirted, bicycle-shortsed cross between her uniform and Sailor Moon's fuku. "My hair isn't nearly long enough anyway."

Anthy pushed the last bobby pin into her finacée's hair. "It's finished, Utena-sama." Utena stood and went to the mirror, making a face.

"The hair in the pigtails aren't the same length..."

"Well, your hair isn't all the same length."

"Mmm..." Utena plucked at the red bow on her chest and glared at Saionji. "This is all your fault."

Just then the door opened and Juri appeared, dragging a sailor-suited and bright pink Miki by the arm. "Why do I have to dress up like a girl? None of the other guys do!"

"I think it's very cute," Anthy said quietly, smiling. Miki blushed deeper.

"Look, Miki, you're just like Ami. Same blue hair, same voice, and you're both shy geniuses."

Miki looked angry. "Same voice? I'm a boy!"

Juri smiled a bit. "I just relay the facts."

"But doesn't she ever wear pants?"

"Come on, Mickey," Utena said. "You look good in a skirt." She snickered.

"It isn't funny!" He looked incriminatingly at Saionji and Touga. "They get to wear normal clothes."

Touga smirked. "It isn't my fault that my most compatable character wears a traditional kendo outfit." He smoothed the bright red hakama. "It even matches my hair."

Saionji folded his arms over Makoto's white canvas apron, grumbling. "I like my apron better."

Moments later, Nanami returned from the bathroom dressed in a grey uniform, her hair in oddly floppy pointed buns. "I can't believe you guys are making me be Chibi-Usa! She's an annoying little bitch!"

Juri shrugged. "A lot of people think she's really cute."

Utena sat back down on the bed next to Anthy. "What about you, Sempai? You don't have a costume on yet..." She picked up the cast list. "Let's see. We've got Usagi, Rei, Makoto, Ami, Luna, and Chibi-Usa... Wakaba's going to be Naru-chan... who else is there?"

Saionji finished tying his hair in a ponytail. "Looks like you're Sailor Venus."

"No way! Minako's boy crazy. And she wants to be an idol singer. I'm nothing like her."

"But she's the only one left..."

Touga chuckled. "I guess we'll finally get to see you in a dress, Arisugawa."

Utena was about to say something when Juri interrupted. "Damned if you will..." She pulled out her manga and flipped through it. "I want to be Michiru. Or Haruka."

Miki had finished the entire series already. "Michiru would probably be more fitting, Juri-san. After all, she's good at everything too."

"All right. I'll be Sailor Neptune. I suppose I will have to wear a skirt, though... oh well." She left the room for a moment and came back wearing a stylish mauve skirt-and-jacket outfit. Everyone generally stared.

"Wow, Sempai... you're pretty."

"Thank you. Now then... who are we missing?" She looked around the room and spotted Mikage, who was sitting in the corner and trying his hardest to turn invisible. "You. You've got to be someone... but there aren't any guys left. There's the Outer Senshi, but..." She paused, pondering. "Oh, wait, you can be Artemis!" Juri fished another cat-ear headband, this one white, out of a drawer and threw it to him.

"I'm not putting this on."

"If Miki can wear a skirt and Saionji can wear an apron, you can wear cat ears."

"But Saionji wears an apron sometimes anyway..."

"Just shut up and put them on."

* * *

The Sailor Senshi and friends gathered on the Seitokai's meeting balcony, trying to get used to their new uniforms. Minako was warming up the curling iron and had high hopes of imitating Juri's hairstile, and Makoto had her wavy hair down and wore a female-tailored green duelists uniform. The four Inner Senshi were glad that their fukus all matched their preferences in color. Naru, dressed in a puffy-sleeved Ohtori uniform, was busy taking Usagi's hair down.

"But I don't want to cut my hair!"

"Usagi-chan, Utena's hair is layered. You're supposed to look like her."

"But I spent my whole life growing my hair out! I'm not going to cut it now!"

Rei wandered over. "She probably could just wear it down. I doubt Utena is doing anything drastic to her hair."

"Yes, that is true..."

Usagi stood, twisting around to get a good look at her black and red outfit, complete with red bow in the back and knee socks with their red stripe at the top. "She sure has strange fashion taste."

"You talk about strange taste..." Chibi-Usa muttered, walking over in her skin-tight yellow and black duelists uniform. "I think I'm too young for this."

Luna padded over with a rose in her mouth. She set it down on the ground so she could speak. "I've found a big garden full of these flowers, ones in all different colors. One for each of you. But I think I'll do something a little different with them..." She took the white rose back in her mouth and tossed it into the air. It clattered to the floor as a larger, gaudier rose-shaped wand, complete with beautiful shiney petals and jeweled droplets of water. Usagi bent to pick it up.

"It's beautiful! Thanks, Luna. So..." Usagi looked at the other Senshi, who had gathered around. Artemis was sulking in a corner on account of having to pretend to hate Luna. "What do we do now?"

Makoto took the note Saionji had given her out of her pocket. "It says here that we should go to the dueling arena."

"What's that?"

Ami, who had installed some episodes into her little hand-held computer and had been watching them, looked up. "It's an architecturally impossible platform that one enters from the Dueling Forest, which is at one end of the campus. Apparently it's the place where most of the action takes place. That and something called 'the Akio-Car'."

Usagi blinked. "What's an Akio?"

Minako shrugged. "Beats me."

There was a pause in the action the author took a moment to laugh herself silly.

* * *

Meanwhile, in a considerably safer environment...

"What do you mean you forgot to tell them about Akio?!"

"Oops."

"This situation goes far beyond 'oops', Saionji."

The green-haired duelist shrugged. "It isn't my fault that they were so eager to hop on the bus and ride off to Ohtori. I'm sure I would have remembered eventually."

Touga sighed. "Those poor girls, walking straight into Akio's hands without anyone to protect them."

Utena smacked him on the back of the head. "Chauvinist!"

"Ow! I'm not!"

* * *

Usagi was out of breath and ready to bawl by the time they got to the top of the stairs.

"This is stupid! Why do they have to have so many freakin' stairs?!"

Ami shrugged. "Utena never looks tired by the time she gets up here. I think they even put an elevator-like thing in later."

"Elevator?! They have an elevator in this thing and you didn't tell me?!"

"Gomen... I thought you wanted to do it exactly like Utena."

"Yeah, well..."

Luna jumped off of her perch with Artemis on Minako's shoulder. "Stop fighting, you two... let's get this started."

"I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing..."

Minako had been watching episodes on Ami's computer. "Well, the first person Utena fights is Saionji. So I guess that would be you, Mako-chan."

"Mmm... okay." Makoto positioned herself about fifty feet away from Usagi, on the other side of the arena. "Now what?"

"Um..." Minako poked a button on the computer. "Do you know how to use a kendo sword?"

"No..."

"Hrm. Well, then... I guess you'll just have to slap her."

Makoto blinked. "Slap her?"

"Yeah. When Saionji's not using his sword, he slaps people... apparently..."

"But Usagi-chan's my friend..."

Luna sighed. "This is supposed to be a duel! Go after the Rose Wand... try to knock it away from her!"

"Uh... all right." Makoto ran at Usagi, jumping in the air and spinning, with the intention of kicking the wand out of her hand. Usagi cringed, throwing her arms up in front of her. The Rose Wand glowed suddenly, and Usagi thrust it into the air. A beam of white-pink light shot from the uppermost turret of the castle that spun above the arena and hit the wand like a lightning rod, sending a burst of energy towards Makoto and throwing her to the ground. Usagi stared at the wand.

Apparently Dios had a sense of humor.

* * * Akio, on the other hand, certainly did not. He glowered at the arena from his tower, his arms folded across his chest. He sensed some disturbance in Dios' power, one that wasn't anything like the power his former self lent to Utena. It was... empty, as if Dios was only showing off. And Akio did not like that one little bit. The shutters slammed and Akio stalked into the elevator.

Moments later, after Usagi had helped Makoto up and carefully given the Rose Wand back to Luna to take care of, a tall figure appeared at the end of the arena in a wrought-iron gondola. He strode out, the light revealing his dark skin and pale hair.

The Senshi ceased their talking and stared in complete silence. There were no comments about old sempai or how kakkoi this man was. They just stared.

"Konban wa," Akio said in his remarkably deep voice, trying to sound menacing and obviously succeeding.

They still just stared. Now, a few of the more practical-minded of the group (namely, Ami, Luna, and Artemis) were beginning to get a bit nervous of how this person was going to take their little cast-switching game.

"Who are you and what have you done with my pawns-- er... duelists?"

"Anou..." Usagi stammered, scared out of her wits. "We switched places for a day..."

Akio quirked an eyebrow. "You... Senshi? Is that what you are? Switched places with my duelists?"

"Yep."

A smile spread across the Dean's face. "Fascinating. Forgive me for not introducing myself. Ohtori Akio, the academy's chairman."

* * * Unaware of the... erm, interesting confrontation going on at Ohtori, the cast of Utena had assembled fully-costumed in Usagi's room, trying to decide what to do next. Utena fooling with her hair.

"This is pretty boring. Don't the Senshi get any action at all?"

"If you play with your hair, Utena-sama, you'll make the buns fall out," Anthy repromanded her sweetly.

Juri stacked her manga on the dresser. "They hang out at the video arcade a lot... but usually, the danger comes to them."

Wakaba bounced on the bed next to Utena. "Let's go down there! We can go to the soda shop, and maybe Mamoru will be there! He's so hot!"

Everyone, except Juri, stared at her blankly. She rolled her eyes. "Have you people been living in a cave? Sailor Moon was the hottest thing since sliced bread! I can't believe none of you ever watched the show or anything."

So, for lack of anything more interesting to do, the gang headed down to the arcade.

When they arrived (in much less than normal attire) Mamoru was in fact there. He sat alone at a booth, studying. When the crowd of students approached his table, he almost fell out of his seat in a very un-Mamoru-like display of surprise. He clambered up, still staring at them, well aware that the entire soda shop was doing the exact same thing, and quickly ushered them outside.

Suitably confused, the Utena-turned-Sailor-Moon cast allowed themselves to be herded across the street into the park where they had first arrived. As soon as they had gotten out of anyone's earshot, Mamoru confronted them.

"What are you people doing? You can't just go around dressed as the Sailor Senshi, you'll attract attention!"

Utena attempted to give an explaination. "We switched places with Usagi and company for a couple of days... they went back to our school, and we stayed here."

Mamoru eyed them in silence for a moment, then finally came up with a suitable responce. "Are you insane?!"

Utena looked around at her assembled companions. "Some of us are."

"Hey!" Nanami yelled indignantly, unaware that no one had actually mentioned her name.

And seeing as Mamoru really didn't have much more of an argument ("are you insane" went pretty far into describing the group's situation as it was), the author decided to move things along a bit and suddenly the wind began to pick up, accompanied by definately-out-of-season cherry blossoms, which collected at the top of a high wall in front of them. Two men (one considerably less so) materialized at on the wall, because villains always have to appear in high places.

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